(Scene 1-the setting: the ELQ jet. Both Brenda and Jason have been doing business, and are on their way home. Jason is getting comfortable in his chair when Brenda enters the cabin. Jason rolls his eyes, as Brenda turns to the pilot)
Brenda: "Great. Nobody told me that Son...oops, I mean Jason, would be here."
Jason: "Get used to it."
Brenda: "Shut up! Don't give me orders!"
Jason: "Chill out already! Geez!"
(Jason begins to look around the cabin, and Brenda glares at him)
Brenda: "What are you looking for?"
Jason: "A tripod....I want to ensure my safety....."
Brenda: "Oh, very funny! You're lucky that I don't just....."
Jason: "What?"
Brenda (grits her teeth): "Argh!!! Nothing, ok? Nothing."
Jason: "Why don't you just sit down? We need to get going, or I'll be late."
Brenda: "Late for what? You're so-called business? Or are you meeting Sonny? Is that it? Huh?"
(Jason stares blankly away from her, saying nothing as the pilot exits the scene)
Brenda: "Say something dammit! Don't just sit there like a zombie!"
Jason: "Dammit? You sound like that speedo-wearing freak Jaxman. Anyway, my business is none of yours. And if I told you once, I told you a million times. I don't know where Sonny is..."
Brenda: "Yeah right."
Jason: "Listen, are we going to take off or not?"
Brenda: "Fine! Just don't talk to me. Don't even look at me!"
Jason: "No problem."
(Jason begins to read a book. Brenda sits in her seat and fastens her seat belt. The plane begins to take off and the scene ends)
*******************
(Scene 2-the setting: The Outback. Jaxman, clad in his speedos, and Robin, wearing her halter top and leather pants, are at a table discussing business)
Jaxman: "I'm so glad that I solved that last case of ours...."
Robin: "What about me?"
Jaxman: "Yes, you were there too Row-bin, way to go."
(Robin shakes her head and chuckles)
Jaxman: "So, are there any other cases that need our attention?"
Robin: "Not that I know of....Although that Alan Quartermaine has been acting pretty wacky lately..."
Jaxman: "Tell me about it. He asked me out the other day..."
Robin (surprised): "What?"
Jaxman (emphatically): "He did! And why wouldn't he? I mean, look at me! I am perfect!" (Robin shakes her head) "But when I hesitated he started screaming at me...telling me my speedos were ugly."
Robin (chuckles): "Well..."
Jaxman: "Shut up Row-bin! If it weren't for your boyfriend and his so-called associates, I wouldn't have needed to buy this new pair..."
Robin: "Jason means well..."
Jaxman: "What, and giving me a wedgie is meaning well?"
Robin (chuckles): "Well, you have to admit it was kinda funny...."
Jaxman: "I don't have to admit anything dammit! I am Jaxman and Jason will pay for what he did to me and my beautiful speedos....Those were Brender's favorite pair..."
Robin: "You still love her, don't you?"
Jaxman: "I would, but quite frankly she scares me. I can't forget about the time she beat me with that tripod of hers. It's good that I'm so rich and powerful. I was able to get all tripods banned from Port Charles."
Robin: "I wouldn't be so sure about that...."
(Jaxman gets a worried look on his face, and the scene ends)
***************
(Scene 3-the setting: the ELQ jet. Jason and Brenda are relaxing on their flight back to Port Charles)
Brenda: "You know, you better stay away from Robin. Everyone knows that mobsters aren't capable of love...."
Jason: "Don't talk about Robin. Don't ever say anything bad about her. Actually, just don't even say her name."
Brenda: "Why not, you claim to love her, but you chose your business instead of her..."
Jason: "That's not what happened." (under his breath) "Although I can see why Sonny left you...."
Brenda: "What was that?"
(Jason sits silently)
Brenda: "Answer me! What about Sonny?"
Jason: "Nothing.....Hey, do you happen to have a pair of scissors on you?"
Brenda: "Let me check...."
(Brenda begins searching in her purse, but finds nothing)
Brenda: "Nope, no scissors."
Jason: "Thank God..." (Jason chuckles)
Brenda: "Oh, you think you're funny? Think you're the next Seinfeld? Huh? Well, you're not. You're not even funny so stop trying to be!"
Jason: "The next who?"
Brenda: "Seinfeld!"
(Jason has a blank look on his face, confused)
Brenda: "Oh never mind...."
Jason: "Fine." (pauses) "I'm starving. Do you know if the pilot has any s'mores?"
(Brenda looks at Jason angrily and the scene ends)
*****************
(Scene 4-the setting: The Outback. Jaxman and Robin are having dinner)
Robin: "So, when do you expect Brenda back?"
Jaxman: "Who?"
Robin: "Brenda?" (Jaxman looks confused) "Oh, sorry. When do you expect Brender home?"
Jaxman: "Oh! I think tomorrow morning. I cannot wait until she sees my new speedos..."
Robin (rolls her eyes): "I'm sure she'll love them...."
(The Jaxphone begins to ring, and Jaxman retrieves his phone from his speedos)
Jaxman: "Hello?....Oh, hi Jerry.....What? How?....Oh dammit!......Dammit dammit!....Thanks for telling me Jerry....Bye."
Robin: "What was THAT about? You seem upset."
Jaxman: "I am dammit! That was Jerry. He just found out that the ELQ jet is carrying both Jason AND Brenda. I don't want her alone with that common criminal!"
Robin: "That's great! Now they'll both have someone else to talk to....They won't be bored on their flight home..."
Jaxman: "What? They hate each other's guts!"
Robin: "Well, I believe that everyone can overcome their negative feelings toward one another....Everyone should. The world would be a much better place if we all just got along...."
Jaxman: "Row-bin, are you nuts? Brender can't stand Jason for good reason!"
Robin: "Jason isn't Sonny...."
Jaxman: "I wonder....Has anyone actually SEEN Sonny in the past few months?"
Robin: "Very funny Jaxman. Jason is a good person. So what if he kills people occasionally? That doesn't mean he's a horrible human being...."
(Jaxman shakes his head, and the scene ends)
*****************
(Scene 5-the setting: the ELQ jet. Brenda is glaring at Jason)
Jason: "What?"
Brenda: "How did you know about those?"
Jason (confused): "Huh? About what?"
Brenda: "S'mores! How did you know about them?"
Jason: "I don't know, I just do. They taste good, I just wanted one. That's all...."
Brenda: "Yeah right! You were spying on me and Jax that night, weren't you?"
Jason: "You're paranoid Brenda. I have better things to do with my time than spy on you and that Aussie freak...."
Brenda: "Then your men were watching. Jax and I had s'mores on Valentine's day, you wouldn't know that unless you saw us...."
Jason: "Geez, I just like s'mores...."
Brenda: "So, you didn't watch us?"
Jason: "No."
Brenda (matter-of-factly): "You're telling me the truth, aren't you."
Jason: "Yes, that's what I said a million times..."
Brenda (pauses, then smiles): "Jax was so romantic that night. He renamed 's'mores' 'Brenders'."
Jason (confused): "Why."
Brenda: "Cause....I don't know, he was just being sweet...."
Jason: "Naming food after someone...that's sweet?"
Brenda: "Yes....Oh, forget it. You'll never understand...."
Jason: "I hope not."
(Jason and Brenda look at each other, and the scene ends)
*************
(Scene 6-the setting: The Jaxcave. Jaxman and Robin are waiting for their next job call)
Jaxman: "So, you really believe that Jason is a good person Row-bin? Need I remind you that he KILLS people for a living?"
Robin: "He means well....I mean, he DID pay for your new speedos after he accidentally ruined your last pair...."
Jaxman: "Accidentally? He gave me a wedgie dammit! And it hurt!"
Robin: "Quit whining Jaxman. You're alive, all the people you've loved are alive, unlike me..."
Jaxman: "Yes, I know Row-bin....."
(The Jaxphone begins to ring)
Robin: "Hey! Maybe that's a job for us!"
Jaxman (picks up the phone): "Hello?"
Stefan (on the other end): "Yes, Jaxman?"
Jaxman: "This is Jaxman...."
Stefan: "Jaxman, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles...I was envisioning that you would be willing to assist me in reacquiring them at your earliest convenience....."
Jaxman (confused): "Is this a prank call?"
Stefan: "A 'prank' call? I do not know the meaning of that term....Is that another one of your 'Americanisms'?"
Jaxman: "Huh?"
Stefan: "What I require from you is the circumspect return of my spectacles....They are a necessity for myself because Katherine really fancies them...."
Jaxman: "Listen, we do not have time for these prank calls. We are very busy! If you call back again, I'll come after you....I am Jaxman dammit!"
(Jaxman slams the phone down and turns to Robin, shaking his head)
Robin: "Who was that?"
Jaxman: "Damn prank caller....Wanted to know if we would find his spect..." (Jaxman looks confused) "I don't know WHAT he was saying...."
(Robin and Jaxman look at each other, and the scene ends)
****************
(Scene 7-the setting: the ELQ jet. Jason and Brenda continue their bickering)
Brenda: "Listen, sorry about the s'mores thing...."
Jason: "I don't care."
Brenda: "Do you care about anything?"
Jason: "Here we go again..."
Brenda: "What's THAT supposed to mean?"
Jason: "Why can't you just leave me alone for any more than ten minutes?"
Brenda: "Because you're Sonny's flunky, that's why."
Jason: "Sonny's gone. Why do you continue to bring it up?"
Brenda: "Because you're a spy for him, I know you are!"
Jason (shakes his head): "Oh geez...."
Brenda: "What. I'm right, I just know it!"
Jason: "Yeah, remember when you accused Robin of being a spy?"
Brenda (embarassed): "I was going through some rough times when I did that."
Jason: "Well, I guess you still are, because I'm not a spy for Sonny."
Brenda: "Was that an insult?"
(Jason just sits, silent. Brenda is beginning to boil)
Brenda: "Huh? Answer me!" (Jason stays silent) "ARGH!!!"
(Brenda begins to hit Jason with her bag. Suddenly, the plane starts to shake, and begins descending)
Brenda: "Oh my God, we're gonna die! And I haven't even put on my make-up yet!"
(The plane continues its free fall, and the scene ends)
*************
(Scene 8-the setting: the Jaxcave. Jaxman and Robin are trying to pass the time while they wait for their next assignment)
Robin: "Jaxman, I'm bored...."
Jaxman: "Me too Row-bin....What can we do to pass the time?"
Robin: "I don't know...."
(Jaxman and Robin sit in silence for a few minutes. Jaxman then perks up)
Jaxman (excitedly): "Hey! I have an idea!"
Robin: "What?"
Jaxman: "I used to love this game, actually I still do....wanna play it with me?"
Robin: "I'd be willing to play anything....."
Jaxman: "It's called Pat-A-Cake..."
Robin: "Except that...."
Jaxman: "Come on Row-bin, please???"
Robin: "Ok, fine...Anything is better than listening to you pout. Let's play." (Robin rolls her eyes)
Jaxman: "Yay! I want to sing though...."
Robin: "Be my guest..."
(Jaxman and Robin are playing Pat-A-Cake, and Jaxman has a huge smile on his face)
Jaxman: "Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake, bakers man. Bake me a cake as fast as you can. Roll it, pat it, and mark it with a 'R'. Put it in the oven for Row-bin and me!" (Jaxman starts to clap) "Yay! I love this game!!!!!"
Robin: "That didn't rhyme Jaxman...."
Jaxman: "I don't care dammit! I won't let you ruin my fun game. Let's play again...."
(The Jaxphone begins to ring, and Jaxman retrieves the phone from his speedos. Robin breathes a sigh of relief)
Jaxman: "Hello?.....What?.....Dammit! Dammit! Ok, we'll be right there. Bye."
Robin: "What was that about?"
Jaxman: "I have some bad news. Jason and Brender's plane went down....And I bet it's Morgan's fault dammit!"
Robin: "Why would Jason try to hurt himself?"
Jaxman: "Because I said he would! We must get to the airport and find out more!"
(Jaxman grabs his coat and rushes out of the Jaxcave. Robin follows and the scene ends)
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