"There's that little part of your brain that tries to bugger it up for you. You could be walking down the street with your girlfriend, everything's fine, your really happy, then suddenly you see all these attractive women on the other side of the street. And that little part of your brain goes 'Oh mate, if you were single, you could just have sex with all of them.' but your brain blocks out bits of information, like the fact they'd have to let you"
It's like when one a spunky celebrity like Pamela Anderson gets married, you know that bit of your brain that just goes 'Oh bugger!' like as if you had a chance. Then six months later you find they've broken up and your like 'I'm back!'"
"IF anyone's drinking tonight, you think you might be over the limit, there's someone else in the car and you get pulled over, just say this. Just say 'Look mate if it's so random how come you always pick the driver?'"
"I'm sueing my priest, not because he molested me but because he didn't. Everyone else in the class was, what am I ugly or something?"
"There was someone who moved from New York to Canberra and he just died. His brain imploded from lack of interest."
"The people I felt sorry for were the people on the boarder, because they had to boil they're water, but had no way of doing it."
"I used to tell people that I was bisexual just so they'd think I'd had sex twice"
Wanna add something? email me at unfrufru@excite.com
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