Chapter 49

"Oh sweetheart ... its beautiful ... you look beautiful," exclaimed Michaela, as she and Colleen watched an excited Kathleen twirl around the room in her newly collected wedding-gown. The young woman had returned from her final trip to Denver before the wedding and hadn't been able to resist trying on her dress. It swirled around her, a billowing cloud of ivory satin, its soft colour giving a creaminess to her fair skin and a gloss to her curly, dark hair.

"It *is* beautiful isn't it?" she agreed with sheer delight. "Just as I pictured it." She stopped her twirling and stood before the full length mirror in Michaela and Sully's bedroom. Michaela stood behind one shoulder and Colleen behind the other, gazing at her entrancing image. The wide, but discreet neckline finished on the point of her shoulders, the luxurious fabric was then cut sleekly over her breasts and cinched in at the waist, accentuating the neatness of her figure. The sleeves ended just below the elbow and were edged with heavy, but narrow lace. The very full skirt, with the benefit of a great number of stiffened petticoats, fell almost seamlessly to just brush the floor. Down the back of the gown was a long line of tiny, pearl buttons, then a bustle of ruched satin sat above a six foot long, lace edged train.

"Ooh ... you're gonna be the prettiest bride," Colleen enthused.

Kathleen met the sparkling eyes of her companions and with a smile, shook her head. "Oh no," she said. "I've seen your wedding photographs ... remember ..."

Michaela and Colleen exchanged understanding and then somewhat secretive looks before Michaela said quietly, "Colleen's right .... You *are* going to be a truly beautiful bride. I can't wait to see Matthew's face."

Kathleen blushed. "You think he'll like it?" she asked longingly.

"I *know* he will," replied Michaela sincerely. "Though I believe you could turn up to your wedding in sack cloth and he'd still be happy."

Again Kathleen reddened and then turned back to the mirror. "I suppose I should take it off," she said, regarding the fairy tale gown wistfully. "Before I do something to it ..." She grasped the skirt in each hand and excitedly swished it around her legs so that it rustled. "Two days to go," she said softly. "Just two days to go ..."

Michaela clasped her shoulders and squeezed sympathetically. "The time will pass quickly enough," she said reassuringly and with a generous smile.

Kathleen spun around to face her. "Won't you reconsider standing up with me Michaela?" she asked earnestly. "I'd love both you and Colleen to take part ..."

"Oh I'll be a part of it," rejoined Michaela. "But no ... this is your moment ... let Sully and I watch on indulgently while Colleen and Brian stand up there beside you both ..."

"Are you sure?" wheedled Kathleen.

"Positive ...," replied Michaela. "Besides ... I'll have two small, excited children to look after ... imagine how'd they'd be if I was standing up there with you ..." She raised her eyebrows in bemusement and they all giggled.

"Did Katie like her new dress?" asked Kathleen genuinely. "She's going to look so pretty walking up the aisle with her basket of rose petals ..."

Michaela laughed. "I had some difficulty persuading her to let me remove it," she rejoined. "She's going to be counting down the hours until the wedding ... Now come on ... take off your dress ... the men downstairs will be wondering where we've got to ..."

Kathleen nodded and turned so Colleen could unfasten the line of pearl buttons down the back of her gown. She stood for a moment lost in thought and then asked pensively, "Do you think the men wonder and worry about wedding things as much as we do?"

Again Colleen and Michaela exchanged glances, before Michaela replied, "Oh they worry alright ... perhaps not about the same things ... but ..."

"And do they get excited? My stomach's fluttering like there are a hundred butterflies flying around in it ... and my heart's pounding ... Do you think Sully got excited about your wedding Michaela ... and what about Andrew Colleen?"

Michaela smiled at the memory. "In his own way ... I think Sully was excited ... we'd waited a long time ...," she replied softly.

"Whereas me an' Andrew got married real quick ... thinkin' we were going off to Philadelphia ... everything had ta be done in a hurry ... so maybe the excitement an' worrying were different," added Colleen.

Kathleen lowered her eyes for a moment and asked self-consciously, "Were ... were you ... I mean ... were you nervous? And I don't mean just about the wedding ...."

Michaela waited to hear if Colleen would reply, and when she didn't, offered, "I think every woman is nervous about it all Kathleen ... its only natural ... I know *I* was ..."

The young woman's eyes flew to meet Michaela's. "You were? ... but you were so much ol ..." She stopped and swallowed.

Michaela chuckled. "Older?" she asked wryly. "Yes ... But wiser? No." She reached out to clasp Kathleen's hands in her own. "Matthew loves you dearly ... you only have to see the way he looks at you to know that ... He's a gentle man ... I know you'll be fine ..."

Kathleen bit her lip and nodded. "I want so much for him to be happy ....," she murmured.

"And he wants exactly the same for you," rejoined Michaela. "Sharing your life with a man ... with all it brings ... can be truly wonderful ... The key is the sharing ...."

"Like you do with Sully ..."

"We try ... you have to work at it ... its doesn't always come easy ... especially at first ..."

"But you and Sully are so close ..."

Michaela nodded and smiled, her eyes sparkling. "Yes ... we are," she agreed softly. "Very," she added, her skin flushing slightly.

As if on cue there was a sudden knock on the bedroom door and Sully called, "Michaela?"

Kathleen quickly moved across so she wouldn't be seen, and Michaela pulled the door open.

"Ah Michaela ... Dorothy's downstairs ... with a Mr Finnegan ... She says you asked her to bring him out here when he arrived on the train?" Sully informed her, his look quizzical.

Michaela smiled broadly. "Ah ... good... he's here," she rejoined delightedly. She turned back to the two girls. "I'll go downstairs with Sully," she said. "You two come down as soon as you're ready ..." She stepped out onto the landing and pulled the door closed behind her.

She started towards the stairs only to be halted by Sully's hand on her arm. "What're ya up to Michaela?" he asked, obviously baffled. "Who's this Finnegan fella?"

Michaela raised her eyebrows and smiled secretively. "You'll soon find out," she said softly, standing on her tiptoes to give him a quick kiss. She tugged him toward the stairs. "Come on ... we shouldn't leave our guests waiting ..."

As they entered the living-room, a plump, ruddy-faced man clambered up from the wingback chair in which he'd been sitting. He took a step towards them and held out his hand, "Ah Dr Quinn," he said. "A pleasure to meet you again ..."

Michaela smiled and returned his handshake. "I'm so grateful you could come on such short notice Mr Finnegan," she rejoined. She turned to Sully, "This is my husband Byron Sully ... Sully ... Mr Finnegan is the photographer from Denver we engaged for Matthew and Kathleen's wedding ..."

Sully shook the smiling man's hand and then said, "Aint ya here a little early Mr Finnegan? ... weddin' aint until the day after tomorra ...."

The photographer raised his eyebrows and with a smile, explained, "Your wife wired me ... asking if I could come today ... I believe she has another job for me ..."

Sully turned to Michaela and eyed her curiously. She clasped his hand and implored softly, "I thought ... well ... while we had the opportunity ... we could have some photographs taken ... of the family ... With Colleen and Andrew leaving for Philadelphia in a couple of months ... and Matthew and Kathleen getting married ...."

Sully smiled and then turned back to the rotund, little man. "Sounds like a good idea ta me ... When would ya like ta start? ... We're all here I reckon ..." He glanced across to where Andrew, Matthew and Brian were entertaining Katie and William by the fireplace.

Michaela interjected, "I suggest we offer Mr Finnegan some refreshment and then we can move outside for the photographs ... in front of the house ... How does that sound? Mr Finnegan ... please sit down and make yourself comfortable ..." There were general nods of approval and after seeing that their visitor was settled, she repaired to the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee.

Sully nodded at the man and then followed her out to the kitchen, walking up behind her to rest his hands lightly at her waist. "Nice idea," he said softly against her ear, as she momentarily leaned back against his warmth. "You aint still worried about that weddin' picture Tilson stole ... are ya?" he asked with concern.

She turned to peer up into his eyes. "I can't forget it Sully," she whispered. "I .. I ... thought perhaps ... taking some *new* photographs ..." She trailed off.

He lovingly kissed her forehead and then her nose. "Like I said ... its alright with me ... but I want ya ta put the other picture outta your mind ... it don' matter ...," he adjured quietly.

She sighed, nodded and lowered her eyes before turning back to the coffee pot.

******************
"Now ... Dr Quinn ... Mr Sully ... perhaps if you stand in the middle of the bottom step," Mr Finnegan instructed, as he contemplated the task of staging the photograph of this rather large family outside their home. "That's it ... now you young man," pointing to Brian. "Beside your mother." Brian sidled up to stand shoulder to shoulder with Michaela. She turned to look at him for a moment, marvelling at the fact that he was now just a little taller than she, had finished school and was setting out to make his own way in the world.

Mr Finnegan regarded Katie whose mutinous expression was a little daunting. She'd been most unhappy when her mother wouldn't allow her to don her new dress for the photographs. "Ah .. perhaps you'd like to be with your father?" he suggested. The little one's eyes narrowed and her lips pursed.

"Hey Kates ... won't ya come up here with me?" enticed Sully. She spun around, hands on hips, to face him. "I'd kinda like ta be holdin' my Kates in the picture," he cajoled. She seemed to regard him with some suspicion for a moment and then suddenly capitulated, running into his open arms. He swept her up high off the ground and as she settled into his embrace, lovingly kissed her cheek. Michaela, her arms full with a lively William, watched on indulgently. It seemed that Katie would always be her father's girl.

"Now ... you miss ... sir," said Mr Finnegan pointing to Colleen and Andrew. "Next to the young man I think ... perhaps you could stand behind him a little sir ..." The young couple stood proudly close to Brian and Michaela and she gulped. Only a couple of months and they would be heading off to Philadelphia. It could be a year before she saw them again! She fought the sudden urge to cry. A gentle hand at her waist told her Sully knew what she was thinking and she gave him a wan smile.

"Now you sir ... and the young lady ... next to Mr Sully," the photographer ordered. Kathleen moved to stand next to the much taller Sully, and Matthew settled a little behind her left shoulder, his hand at her waist. They both leant forward a little to give Michaela warm smiles. She returned their warmth with a smile of her own. Two more days and another of her children would be married. It seemed only yesterday that Matthew had brought his younger siblings to the old homestead and rebelliously declared that they were only there because they had to be. Now Matthew was more her friend than her son and she was thrilled to think that he would be living close by with his delightful new wife. Kathleen brought Matthew a happiness that had been missing for a long time. Michaela recognised that the young couple's mutual respect and love would carry them through any troubles they may encounter. It was clear that this was a match which would last.

Mr Finnegan backed away a little toward the corral, creating a picture shape with his hands so he could more objectively examine the composition of his proposed photograph. "Yes," he said, more to himself than anyone. "Very nice ..." He returned to his camera and proceeded to load a plate. "Everyone looking at me now ... big smiles ...," he instructed.

Everything and everyone, including William who couldn't understand what was happening but seemed to sense the moment anyway, suddenly stilled, and with a flick of his wrist Mr Finnegan took the first photograph. Bathed in summer sunshine, the Sully/Quinn/Cooper/Cook family was captured in time. When the photographer indicated they could finally move there were giggles, wide smiles, and shuffling of feet.

"Perhaps another?" suggested Mr Finnegan.

"Everyone'll want one," said Sully quietly. "Perhaps ya better take a few ..."

For the next several minutes, Mr Finnegan photographed the family in a variety of poses, enjoying the obvious love and happiness which seemed to emanate from the group. He was disconcerted for a moment however, when, in the midst of setting up a shot, a rider appeared from the distance, a rider who turned out to be an indian! When the man, garbed in traditional indian dress, was greeted with wide smiles and hugs, (especially by Miss Jennings who had been quietly watching the proceedings) he relaxed, though couldn't help but be a little wary. A short while later, a negro couple and their baby boy arrived in a wagon from town and were again greeted with delight. This was indeed an interesting family!

"Ah ... Mr Finnegan ... I'd like to include Grace and Robert E ... they're Katie's godparents ... and also Dorothy and Cloud Dancing in the next couple of photographs," requested Michaela.

"That's fine Dr Quinn," rejoined the ruddy-faced man. "But all these pictures will be expensive ...."

"That's fine ... we'll manage," interjected Sully quietly, taking his wife's hand and squeezing it gratefully.

The man smiled. "Right then ... where would you like them to stand?"

With Cloud Dancing and Dorothy taking up positions close to Sully, Matthew and Kathleen, and Robert E and Grace standing alongside Colleen and Andrew, the picture taking continued. Between shots there was much laughter and quipping, until finally Mr Finnegan stood back and said, "That should do it then ... I've taken a great many ..." The group instantly broke apart and the photographer looked to begin dismantling his camera.

Michaela immediately started towards him. "Ah ... no ... we're not quite finished Mr Finnegan ... please ..." The photographer's eyebrows rose in puzzlement. "Ah ... I'd like you to take just a couple more ... alright?" she entreated.

"Of course," he rejoined immediately. "Of everyone?"

She shook her head. "No," she replied guardedly. She turned to her family and friends milling around the yard. "Colleen ... would you please take everyone inside for coffee and cake?"

"Sure ma," the young woman replied, aware of what her mother had in mind.

Michaela grasped Sully's hand and turned to the photographer. "We'll be back in a moment," she said quietly, abruptly turning on her heel and tugging Sully towards the porch steps.

Once upstairs in their bedroom, Michaela pulled open the bottom drawer of the dresser and lifted out a familiar garment. She turned to a bemused Sully. "Please?" she asked simply.

He reached across, took the wedding shirt from her, letting it unfold in the process, and held it up against his chest. "This aint necessary Michaela," he said quietly. "I told ya that photograph don' matter ..."

"For me?" she implored. "Please?"

Their eyes met and he suddenly smirked. "How can I say no to ya?' he said lovingly.

She smiled and stepped in close. "You can't," she whispered enticingly.

He shrugged. "I know it," he rejoined, lifting his shirt off over his head and pulling on the heavy and ornate, indian wedding shirt. He tugged it straight and then eyed her speculatively. "What're *you* gonna wear?" he asked teasingly.

Her eyes widened. "Um .. what I've got on," she replied, twigging the skirt of her pretty floral, summer dress into place.

"If I gotta dress up ... so've you," he cajoled.

"I ... I ... can't wear my wedding gown ... it was altered for Colleen remember ..."

He thought for a moment, and then said quietly, "I aint seen ya in that dress ya ma sent for your birthday ..."

"I'd just had William when it arrived," she explained ruefully. "And there haven't been too many appropriate occasions ..."

"This might be one of 'em," he suggested. "I aint wearin' this ... if you're not gonna dress up too ..."

Michaela chuckled and turned to the wardrobe, finally pulling out the beautiful, bronze coloured gown her mother had sent. "Its rather grand isn't it?" she said softly. "What about my hair?"

"Your hair's just fine the way it is ... you know I like it hangin' down all soft like that ..."

Some minutes later, an impatient Mr Finnegan was startled to see Dr Quinn and her husband emerge from the house dressed in their rather unconventional finery.

"Just the two of us please," requested Michaela of the photographer.

He nodded and asked, "Out here? Usually couples are photographed inside ... the man sitting, the woman standing ..."

Both Michaela and Sully shook their heads. "No ... that aint us at all Mr Finnegan," replied Sully. "Out here'll be fine ..."

"And the pose?"

Michaela immediately grasped Sully's hand and they moved to stand by the porch railing, Michaela on the first step, Sully on the ground, so they were more even in height. "Here'll be alright won' it?" asked Sully.

"Ah ... yes ... of course ... whatever you want," rejoined the photographer.

While the man set up the camera and angle and then loaded the plate, Sully turned towards Michaela a little, tenderly clasped both her hands, lifting them to rest against his chest, and drew her close. "This'll be just fine," he whispered, locking his gaze with hers. "Don' ya think?"

She smiled. "Perfect," she returned, her love for him shining in her eyes. "Just perfect."

Mr Finnegan didn't have to instruct the couple to stay still, or to smile, for when he looked up they were standing close together, their gaze not for the camera, but for each other, unmindful of anything else going on around them. He smiled to himself and took the first photograph and then a second. All the while they stood lost in their own private world, unaware of the many indulgent looks and smiles from first the photographer and then their family and friends peeking through the lace curtains of the homestead windows.

*******************
Sully watched Michaela as she moved around the room preparing for bed. Tonight there was a peace, a serenity, about her which hadn't been there for months, actually ever since the Tilson business had started. And with this new serenity came an enhanced beauty, a beauty that took his breath away. His heart pounded a little. He sometimes marvelled at the fact that each day he loved her more, and tonight was one of those times. They'd been through so much in their four years of marriage, experiences that had the potential to destroy a marriage, but not theirs. He watched as she paused by William's crib to observe him sleeping and his heart pounded again. Wife, mother, doctor, friend - each role was equally important to her and he loved her for it. She looked up at him, met his loving gaze and smiled and his breath caught. He drew the covers back and beckoned and she moved towards him without hesitation.

Michaela climbed into the bed and immediately nestled in close to Sully, facing him, her hand resting on his bare chest. Ever since this afternoon she'd been waiting for this time when she could be alone with him, truly alone. An excitement, a need, had been building up inside her, to hold him, to tell him she loved him and now nothing else mattered. With these thoughts, her hand on his chest gently, unconsciously, caressed his bare skin and she lovingly kissed his shoulder. When his arms encircling her tightened a little, she peered up at him and smiled, inviting his kiss. He willingly obliged and she raised herself a little to accommodate him. As the very satisfying kiss ended she sighed contentedly and settled back down against him. The slight rise and fall of his chest while he silently chuckled brought her eyes back to his and she bit her lip with embarrassment.

Sully clasped his wife to himself lovingly. This ingenuous side of Michaela was rarely seen by anyone but him. He brushed her hair back from her face and whispered, "Bin quite a day aint it? Thank-you for thinkin' of the photographs ..."

"You didn't mind?"

He shook his head. "I like it when ya surprise me ... an' you were right ... with Colleen an' Andrew goin' away an' Matthew an' Kathleen gittin' married ..."

Her hand tenderly caressing his chest, she took up where he'd left off, "Our family is going its own way ... and yet grows bigger in the process ... It'll be nice to have a recent picture of us all ... There were nine of us there today Sully ... *nine*!"

He chuckled again. "I always wanted a family," he said softly. "Never imagined one so big ... an' different though ..."

"Different?"

He smiled. "Ya could never say we've got the usual sort o' family Michaela," he said quietly. "There's you ... the refined lady doctor from Boston ... me who's lived most of his life on his own .. an' don' even know where he was born ... three great kids we sorta inherited ... who are just about grown up now, all wantin' ta study an' make somethin' of 'emselves ... another doctor from back east ... a young lady from Charlestown society ... an' our two little kids ... Its quite a family ..."

Michaela peered up at him proudly. "Mmm ... it is isn't it?" she said with satisfaction. "And then of course there's the possibility of grandchildren ..."

"Hey ... I don' know if I'm ready for that yet ... I'm still gittin' used ta bein' a father ...," Sully protested with a grin.

She chuckled. "Well ... I wouldn't be surprised ... I doubt Matthew and Kathleen will wait ..."

"I s'pose I'd git used ta it ... eventually ...," he rejoined dubiously.

"You were made to be a father and grandfather Sully," offered Michaela sincerely.

"Ya never know ... *we* might have another baby yet Michaela," he suggested hopefully.

She lowered her eyes. "I doubt it," she said softly. "Its been four years since we started with Katie ... and I was worried I was too old to conceive then ..."

"But then along came William," he offered.

"Yes ... along came William," she agreed. "But don't set your heart on another baby Sully ... please ..."

He pulled her closer. "I got everythin' I ever wanted Michaela ... Anythin' that happens from here on in is extra ... a bonus ... I don' need anythin' else ta be happy ... alright?" he avowed.

She nodded gratefully and gently caressed his neck and face. She suddenly looked up at him as a thought struck her. "Speaking of babies," she said, a touch of excitement in her voice. "Teresa Slicker came into the clinic first thing this morning ..."

He smiled. "She did huh?"

"Mmm ..."

"And?"

"She's finally pregnant ... and so excited ..."

Sully smiled broadly. "That's real good ... seems we maybe did some good with them two ... Do ya remember how excited we were when we found out Katie was comin'?"

"Oh yes ... I remember," she sighed. "And then with William ..."

"Won' be long an' he'll be runnin' around ... with us chasin' after him," chuckled Sully.

"It seems only yesterday when he was born ... right here in this bed ..."

"An' your ma turned up ... an' all our friends were downstairs ... waitin' ..."

"And listening ...."

"Guess they couldn' help that ..."

"No ... I suppose they couldn't," she rejoined with a wry smile. Again she peered up into his eyes. "Sometimes I feel as if my life is so full ... I'm going to burst with love ... and pride ...," she said softly.

"Then you can imagine how I feel," rejoined Sully sincerely. "I got the family I always wanted ... an' with you beside me ..."

"Always .."

"Yeah ... always ... there aint nothin' can spoil it ..." He bent and kissed her adoringly. "I love you Michaela Quinn ... now more 'an ever ..."

She rolled so she was almost laying atop him, her sparkling eyes locking with his. "When our photograph arrives ... the one of just you and I ... I'm going to sit it over there on the mantle ... just to remind me ...," she murmured.

"Remind you?"

"That no matter what happens ... it comes down to you and I Sully ... together ...," she said softly, her eyes sultry and adoring.

He reached up to tuck her coppery hair back behind her ears and whispered, "Always ..."

"Yes ... always," she agreed with reverence. She smiled seductively and then lowered her head to whisper, "I ... I need some holding now ... please ..."

Sully needed no further bidding. His senses had been stirring ever since they'd entered their bedroom, and he instinctively knew she'd felt the same. Now their talk of love and devotion had inflamed them further. He abruptly rolled her sideways and under, blanketing her with his naked form. Tenderly at first and then more urgently, he proceeded to join her mouth and then body with his in the age old way of passionate lover and beloved ....

The law of the past cannot be eluded,
The law of the present and future cannot be eluded,
The law of the living cannot be eluded .... it is eternal,
The law of promotion and transformation cannot be eluded,
The law of heroes and good-doers cannot be eluded,
The law of drunkards and informers and mean persons cannot be eluded. ...

I shall go with the rest ... we have satisfaction:
I have dreamed that we are not to be changed so much ... nor the law of us changed;
I have dreamed that heroes and good-doers shall be under the present and past law,
And that murderers and drunkards and liars shall be under the present and past law;
For I have dreamed that the law they are under now is enough. ...

Oh my soul! If I realise you I have satisfaction, ...
Laws of the earth and the air! If I realise you I have satisfaction.

I cannot define my satisfaction ... yet it is so,
I cannot define my life ... yet it is so.

Excerpts from "Leaves of Grass - To Think of Time" by Walt Whitman