Highlander Wavs
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Now a Scotsman's weapon, that's another matter. Once it gets going there's nothing that can stop it. Two hands to hold the thing. I doubt you could even hold it. Come to Scotland and I'll show ye. Ye dinnae think I could bring it in here, did you? I mean the bloody thing wouldn't fit through the door. My claymore, of course, what did you think I meant? |
DM |
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I was married once, you know. Well, I mean I was married 67, no 68 times. You had 68 wives?? |
DM/M |
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The alternative is unthinkable. |
M |
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You know you won't let me change, you really expect me to steal. I expect sharks to bite, don’t take it personally. |
DM/A |
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I just passed through my angry adolescence a little quicker than you. |
M |
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Alright, Charlie, move your ass. I've got an appointment to keep. |
JD |
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She said I looked awesome. |
DM |
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Yeah, which is really important because they could get…real bad hurt out on the street. Real bad hurt? I don't know! Real bad hurt? Oh, someone teach hime some English, would you? (blooper tape) |
PW/AP |
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You're beautiful. |
DM |
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Have a beer. |
M |
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I beg your pardon! |
DM |
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I know how tall Nero was, I know Jesus’ favorite food, I know Helen of Troy didn’t have that great a face, and I know it launched a hundred ships not a thousand… Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah… |
DM/M |
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Bonny Portmore |
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Queen |
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Candygram! |
M |
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Mi casa es su casa. |
M |
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You think that’s bad, she called me a cheap whore and a thief. I was never cheap. |
A |
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You know, sometimes you knowing everything gets to be a real pain in the ass. |
RR |
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A couple of medieval songwriters come up with the idea of chivalry one rainy day and you embrace it as a lifestyle--you live and die by a code of honor that was trendy when you were a kid. |
M |
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| (pretty good event sound) | ||
I've waited almost 200 years for this. Do the words compulsive obsessive mean anything to you? |
M |
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Leave him alone. Hey, I'm talking to you, conehead! |
DM |
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An ale would do just fine. |
DM |
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Strong words for a man who spends his time saving sheep from the slaughter. I never fed off human blood and misery to gain power. And pleasure, don’t forget pleasure |
DM/Alexi |
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If you die, Amanda will be free to date. |
M |
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200 years ago Edmund Burke said that the only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing. |
DM |
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Come and die. |
DM |
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I'll cut you down as you stand. |
DM |
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I am DMotCM and you are dead. |
DM |
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I'm outta here. No you're not, you're not out of here. Is what she said true? The times were different, MacLeod, I was different--the whole bloody world was different! OK? Did you kill all those people? Yes. Is that what you want to hear? Killing was all I knew. Is that what you want to hear? It's enough. No, it’s not enough! I killed. But I didn't just kill 50. I didn't just kill 100. I killed 1000--I killed 10000…and I was good at it. And it wasn't for vengeance, it wasn't for greed, it was because I liked it. Cassandra was nothing, her village was nothing. Do you know who I was? I was Death. Death, Death on a horse. When mothers warned their children that a monster would get them, that monster was me. I was the nightmare that kept them awake at night. Is that what you want to hear? The answer is yes, oh yes. |
DM/M |
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DM intro to HL |
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Disappointed in me, huh? |
M |
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I dislike death, but there are things that I dislike more than death. |
DM |
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Therefore there are occasions when I will not avoid danger. |
DM |
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Death before dishonor. For some of us |
M/DM |
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If you so much as scratch her I’ll dissect you. |
DM |
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DM giggle |
DM |
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I’m DmotCM and I think your fight’s with me. |
DM |
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One word. OK. Animal, 4 legs, carries heavy weights. Donkey. No, no, no—try 3 letters. |
DM/M |
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You don’t trust anybody, do you? |
DM |
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You dinnae think I could bring it in here, did you? I mean the bloody thing wouldn’t fit through the door! |
DM |
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The bad news is, I’m really pissed. |
DM |
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Bet you were on the Mayflower. Impossible, I’d never make it as a Puritan. |
DM/TN |
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I’m warning you, I trashed the place. The place is a mess. I haven’t been myself lately. You know I hadn’t noticed that. |
DM/M |
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This is what I’ve dreamt of every night for the past 2,000 years. The four of us reunited! Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘dream team.’ |
M/K |
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Darius' eulogy (long) |
DM |
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Oh c’mon, you’ve gotta trust me. |
RR |
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In the end, there can be only one. |
DM |
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I’m DmotCM, I don’t think we’ve had the pleasure. |
DM |
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Give me a beer! I said give me a beer! What's it take to get service? |
EM |
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You still don’t understand it, MacLeod. I am the end of time! |
K |
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Oh man, the guy I trusted more than anything else in the world tried to kill me. |
RR |
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EDM laugh |
EDM |
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Here’s Duncan! Yes, it’s me, and this time, I’m here to stay. |
EDM |
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I had no choice. That is existentially inaccurate. All right, I will come with you! |
DM/M |
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Joe, you never give a Watcher's first and last name and you couldn't get any of them to help, and then suddenly one of them's phoning you with information… and whenever you lie you do this funny thing with your face. What? |
M/JD |
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Hey, Doc, it's been a long time! You've become kind of famous again. Yeah, I just can't seem to shake it. |
M/Byron |
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My father couldn’t grasp what had happened. Well who could? Man, he must’ve freaked—I mean, there you were all of a sudden on your feet again, zombie in a kilt. |
DM/RR |
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Maybe it’s one of your fan club. |
DM |
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Oh, I like it fast. |
DM |
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Fetch me another, this one’s broken |
Kalas |
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Runaway! |
Fitz |
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Do you mind putting that down or were you planning to use it? |
M |
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Did you come to fight or talk? |
DM |
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This is beginning to be fun. |
DM |
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Don't I even get a kiss? |
DM |
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Get a life. |
DM |
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You are immortal, Richie--do you have any idea the gift you have been given? Don't let him turn you into something you're not. You're not a killer, Richie |
JD |
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:::crash::: Great, another window. |
DM |
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Double glenmorangie on the rocks. Glenmorangie…right. |
CM |
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Try not to think of yourself as dead, more like metabolically challenged. You know--handicapped, like in golf. |
Fitz |
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I killed, but I didn’t just kill 50, I didn’t kill 100. I killed 1000, I killed 10,000! And I was good at it. |
M |
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You know we actually make a really good team. Like Scully and Mulder, Sipowicz and Simone, Caligula and Ichytartus (sp?)…well, maybe not Ichytartus since he was a horse. |
M |
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Hey, grab a beer, there's a cold one in the fridge. Yeah, I know, it's my fridge. |
DM/M |
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The penalty for poaching is supposed to be hanging! That’s it—hang me, hang me! |
DM |
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heh heh heh |
CM |
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Honey, I'm home. |
DM |
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And I could do with a bloody cold highland ale. |
DM |
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It was a selfless act in the interest of historical accuracy. |
M |
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you hit hard, huh? 'Bout as hard as I do. |
DM |
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You kill DM. But he’s my friend. He’s nothing to you—why? Why? Because he’s your friend. Because you still have to prove yourself and because you owe me! |
M/K |
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It’s been a long time, Highlander, you’re gonna taste good. Yeah, well you’re gonna go hungry. |
DM/? |
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Archangel |
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I am Methos, you live to serve me. Never forget that. |
M |
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I am Methos, you live to serve me. |
M |
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I wasn't thinking, I was improvising. |
M |
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I guess it wouldn't help to tell you I'm innocent. |
DM |
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You live because I wish it! |
M |
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I beg to differ, the bullets are back that way! Look, we lost those clowns two towns ago! I saved your life, I get to choose. |
JD/M |
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What do you expect? Einstein? Freud? Budda? Forget it. Sorry, Joe, I’m just a guy. |
JD/M |
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It's what I do best. |
Kronos |
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The horsemen rule or the world dies. Has a nice ring to it. |
Kronos |
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You know, I never know when you're kidding. |
DM |
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I'm gonna put a little kink in your ass. |
DM |
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What if I kiss it and make it better? How much better? |
DM/A |
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Damn, outstanding! I'm not done yet. |
DM/Kord |
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I'm afraid Duncan is otherwise engaged. Am I wrong? Don't I owe you something? |
K |
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Well, Highlander, did you really think you could kill me? |
K |
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Can't imagine life without you, man. Fact is, I don't want to. |
JD |
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I think she likes me. |
DM |
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Just because I don't like to kill doesn't mean that I can't. |
M |
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Listen, I hate long goodbyes. |
M |
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There must be a lot of guys who look like us. Yeah, right. |
RR/Cop |
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Now why would you want to do that? Because of who you are--you are too important to lose! |
EDM/M |
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It was love at first sight. |
DM |
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I love you, too, sweetheart. |
DM |
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song (blooper tape) long |
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song (blooper tape) |
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(evil laugh) Smell that, Dawson? It’s the smell of your own mortality, your own death. |
EDM |
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I don’t get it, Mac, the guy seemed so enlightened about life. |
RR |
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Perhaps, dear Mary, death is not truly a journey's end but just another turn in the road. If you believe that, you can live without fear. |
M |
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Grab a beer. |
M |
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Well, well, well—what have we here, mice in the parlor? And immortal mice at that. |
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Adam Pierson here. You can leave your message after the beep. |
M |
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Why does he like this music? There's no Springsteen, no Queen… |
M |
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Surprise, you're not dead! |
M |
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That did not please me. |
M |
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Well that's very brave, but not very smart |
DM |
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I am your obedient servant. |
DM |
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Thank you, master of the bloody obvious. |
DM |
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There can be only one. |
DM |
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M |
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He'll die, Methos. Then we'd get our own show! (blooper) |
M/A |
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Patience, Highlander. You've done well. |
R |
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(Victoria's Secret commercial) |
AP |
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Do you want to knock a bit louder? I don’t think they heard you in Philidelphia. |
M |
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You are such a pain in the ass |
M |
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Scholarly interest. I just came by to watch the perfect immortal die. I’m not. Not what? Not the perfect immortal or not going to die? |
M |
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Well, it's your problem if you're seen here. |
DM |
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Do you know the nutritional value of trout? |
DM |
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The world living in fear of the Horsemen. And you expect me just to let that happen? You should know me better than that. |
DM/M |
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This is nothing, lady, I’ve had the crap beat out of me by the best. |
RR |
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Well this is a Scottish body and it can wash itself! |
DM |
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Signs for the prophesy are all in place. Or don’t you believe in signs? Oh no, I believe in signs; don’t litter, don’t step on the grass, no spitting… I prefer rest in peace. OK then. |
DM |
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I killed Silas! I liked Silas! |
M |
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I'll take the clumsy one with the special skills. |
DM |
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Smooth. Very, very smooth. I'm taking notes. |
RR |
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Yeah, he went out of town, he went to San Francisco to whack the SOB who killed her husband. Richie, you’re the SOB that killed her husband. |
RR/JD |
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Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod. That’s who I am. Well I guess someone has to be. |
DM/M |
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Well, I still have my sparkling personality. |
DM |
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And you stay alive as long as you please me. |
M |
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Learn this lesson well—I will kill you as many times as it takes to tame you. |
M |
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Are you out of your tiny little mind? |
DM |
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You take care, my friend. |
JD |
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What the hell is wrong with you—you know you damn near took my head?! |
RR |
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I'm too old for this. |
M |
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It’s Tuesday, he doesn’t take heads on Tuesday. |
DM |
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This is very uncool, guys. |
RR |
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Talk about the blind leading the visually challenged. |
M |
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It's nice to feel wanted. |
M |
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More wine, wench! |
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Where the hell is MacLeod? How the hell should I know? You’re his Watcher, dammit, it’s your job. |
RR/JD |
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The answer is yes…oh, yes. |
M |