Kansas, Kansas, Here She Comes!

As the plane touched down in Wichita, she felt a strange feeling never felt before. A quiver of excitement, yes, but something else. Perhaps nerves. Maybe a tornado was waiting to take her off to Oz before she knew it. Or maybe it was only Auntie Em going to come and demand she help count the chicks... In any case, reaching Wichita was not a particularly welcome event.

She exited the plane and looked around, as if by simply wishing it, someone would step forward and offer to solve this mystery. But it was not to be. She walked to baggage claim and picked up her meager belongings. All she had were the items from the packages, her toothbrush, and several pairs of clean underwear.

Surveying the area around the airport, her eye was drawn to a quaint little dive with a scarcely burning sign marked "Papa Joe's..." something something. The words were obliterated and impossible to read. She stepped inside, and found herself surrounded by thick cigarette smoke, burly farmer looking types, and a dingy interior. Everyone stopped their banter and drinking and looked at her suspiciously as the door shut behind her. She suddenly felt very afraid, very tense, and very surrounded by cannibals.

The locals sized her up, grinning big grins, and she was able to see where many of them had lost teeth. One particulary repulsive gent slammed back what turned out to be his ninth corn whiskey and strolled over to her in a very macho manner, until he tripped on his work bootlaces.

"What can I do fer ya, li'l lady?" he asked, trying to impress her with his high octane breath and greasy hair. He rubbed his pudgy fingers through his hair, down over his massive chest, and was moving down his portly belly when she finally shook herself out of her shock and said, "What do any of you know about this!?" She held up the fish, now smelling worse than ever, and the man backed off. Apparently he was unwilling to allow his buzz to be ruined by a deranged fishmonger. For her efforts, she was abruptly escorted out the door by the bouncer, and left in the street alone.

Sighing dejectedly, she had no choice but to check into a hotel for the night, to regather her wits and make her plans to go home. She knew she would never get to the end of this mysterious set of occurences, and when she checked into the local Motel 8, she could have cared less. She entered her room, sat on the bed, and kicked off her shoes. Flopping backwards, she passed out and slept fitfully through the night.