Hey, does anybody but me remember when Scott Hall WASN'T a giant pimple on the ass of society? Man, I know I'm setting a dangerous trend here, talking about the "good 'ol days" of wrestling quite frequently in my last few columns, hey, maybe I'm getting old myself, but dammit, there was a day when you could sit ringside for a Scott Hall match and not risk him stealing your beer. Yes, I remember it well. Razor Ramon, as he called himself in his WWF days (1992-1996) was a huge star, and provided some of the best stuff of that era. Man, who will ever forget his ladder matches with Shawn Michaels, or the funny stuff he and Goldust put on? Then he went to WCW, and while I hate to admit it, I found myself watching and actually ENJOYING the early NWO stuff. It's kinda gone downhill from there, hasn't it? Scott Hall hasn't been regularly featured on WCW television for quite some time now. If not for his substance abuse issues, then for fear of him doing something unpredictable on live TV, as I understand it. Now where is Hall? Well, I'll tell you where he's not - in a position to screw up again. Hall was arrested for parole violation about a week and a half ago. This comes right on the heels of his firing from WCW. I won't go into all the details, those were covered in the news last issue. All I know is that Scott Hall has got a couple of options on his plate right now - he can either clean his shit up and get his act together, make a return to wrestling, get involved in his kids' lives in a positive way, and try to keep his criminal record from getting any longer, OR - he can keep going down this same path, and eventually no one will care that this idiot has landed himself behind bars for the rest of his life. Personally, I would love to see a clean, sober, law-abiding Razor return to the World Wrestling Federation. Will it ever happen? Probably not, but never say never.
Moving onward - The British Bulldog, Davey Boy Smith. He was also arrested last week. Of all things, he's arrested for making death threats on his already estranged wife, Diana. As if the Hart family hasn't had their share of problems for the last three years, this happens. I'm sure you all know of the Bulldog's substance abuse problem, and that he has been in rehab for it for quite some time now. Technically, the British Bulldog is still under WWF contract, but like I said, that's just a technicality. Anyway, Diana claims the Bulldog made death threats on her. Bulldog was arrested, booked, then released, and arrested again the next day for the same damn thing. It's a shame for this to happen to a guy who in my opinion is a WWF legend. Kinda makes his storyline a few years ago with Shawn Michaels supposedly hitting on Diana and him coming to her aid look like dog crap, huh? I really don't know what to make of the whole thing, I had never heard bad things about the Bulldog until the last year or so. I suppose, as is the case with Scott Hall, the best thing would be to simply hope for a clean, sober, law-abiding return of the British Bulldog. He's really the only Hart family member left in mainstream wrestling, so if he's done, it seems a real family legacy will have the doors closed.
The point of this whole column? Kids, don't do drugs. Don't drink (at least not to where it's a problem), and don't make death threats to your wife (or anyone else..that's a no-no too). Oh yeah, and in Juvi's case, don't get naked in public, after all, the cops can't strip search you if you're naked. I mean, why make it easy on them? Geez. I guess that concludes this edition of the Tombstone. Until next time, try not to piss off the police. I know the prospect of sharing a cell with Davey Boy or Scott Hall sounds good, but just wait until the lights go out.
