Yet Another Monkee-sized Tale - "The Billy goats gruff!"
Narrator: This is the story of three little goats...
Micky: Monkees!
Narrator: Right. The three little Monkees are on their way to Stafford Bay.
Mike: Where we have a gig we play today!
Micky: And with foxy chicks we hope to stay! (Growls)
Peter: And with this we get a weeks pay!
Narrator You don't have to rhyme fellas!
All: Whatever you say!
Narrator: (Rolls eyes) Our guys are late to the gig they play.
Mike: Come on guys, we must not DELAY!
Micky: But there is (mocks Mike) A bridge in yon way!
Mike: Whats a yon?
Peter: What we do when you start telling us a story.
(The guys approach the bridge)
Narrator: Ohh whats this? This is the Stafford Bay bridge. There is a troll under it.
Peter: Did you hear that guy? Theres a troll under it!
(overheard)Davy: Why must I get the troll part?
Micky: You fit the suit!
Mike: Stay in character, okay?
Davy: Hark I am evil troll! You must pay a toll to cross my bridge!
Mike: We must get over the bridge to get to the gig!
Davy: And I have to grow another two feet. We all must do things ya know!
Micky: What do we do?
Peter: Without that gig we are through!
Narrator:The boys ran over the bridge one by one, and one by one they came back.
Peter: Hes bites really hard. I didnt know he could reach my ankles!
Micky: Hes like totally mean.
Mike: We need a new plan!
Narrator: So our boys thought and thought and thought. Finally, a plan!
Mike: I have an idea! (Lightbulb appears over his head. Micky takes it and puts it his bag.) Peter, you go first!
Peter: Why me?
Micky: Cause we can get another keyboard player?
Mike: (pinches Micky) Cause while the trolls going after the bait, we can run across to safety!
Peter: Why am I called bait?
(Micky and Mike look at each other)
Micky: You got the most important part!
Peter: Okay, but this is the last time. He bites really hard!
Narrator: Our stupid....I mean intrepid hero Peter goes to the bridge. Oh man, whats gonna happen? I don't think I can look.
Mike: You gotta look, you're the Narrator, ya know!
Narrator: I never said I liked it.
Davy: Like pay the toll man!
Peter: Can you take an IOU?
Davy: Oh brother...
Narrator: So Peter aims for the one part they havent tried yet, the heart-string!
Peter: (sad music plays) Please mister, let us cross. I have to get medicine for my little baby sister Sheba. If we don't get it, she'll....she'll. (Cries)
Davy: (trying to hide a sniffle) Why didn't you say so, go on over.
Peter: Thanks! (runs over)
Narrator: So our boys go over the bridge.
Mike: I had no idea Peter had a sister....(looks over the side, the troll heard it all!) oops!
Narrator: The troll...
Davy: Hey!
Narrator: Ok ok, our bridge dwelling person of diminished size yet overpowering smell...
Davy: Better!
Narrator: comes over the side of the bridge and chases the guys over the other side. The minute they reach the grass on the other side, the troll suddenly stops.
Davy: Aw nuts!
Peter: I saved the day!
Mike: And to the gig we must away!
Micky: Goodbye small host!
Narrator: So our heroes made it to the gig and made their money. All is well.
The end!
Davy: Not so fast! I got them on the way back.
Narrator: At least there is a happy ending for someone.
