What are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat,
It's not your fault.
They won't take you to the vet,
You're obviously not their favorite pet.
It may not be a bed of roses,
And you're no friend to those with noses.
GRANDMA
Now Grandma's the person who everyone likes,
BARNYARD ANIMALS
Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo,
TWO OF THEM KISSED LAST NIGHT
There was a girl we'll call her Betty
CHRISTMAS SONG DEDICATED TO HER FRIENDS
Monica, Monica, have a Happy Hannukah,
CREMATED MOTHER
And my mother's ashes
SNOWMAN
I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin'
MY COMA GUY
You don't have to be awake to be my man
CRUSTY OLD MAN
...And the crusty old man said
And the milk is getting sour
THEY FOUND THEIR BODIES
And they found their bodies the very next day
BABIES
They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch
TERRY'S A JERK
Terry's a jerk!
WHEN I PLAY
When I play I play for me
BI-SEXUALS
Sometimes men love women
DON'T
There'll be times when you get older
66 COLORS OF MY BEDROOM
...fuschia and mauve....those are the
WHEN I PLAY
When I play I play for me
STILL MORE TO COME!!!
She bought you a train and a bright shiny bike,
But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner,
And last time you saw her, she looked so much thinner,
Now your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru,
But the truth is she died, and someday you will too.
La, la, la, la, la, la, la.......
Oh, the cow in the meadow goes moo.
Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up,
And that's how we get hamburgers....
Now..CHICKENS!!
And a guy let's call him Neil
Now I can't stress this point too strongly
This story isn't real.
(time passes by)
Now our Neil must decide
Who will be the girl that he casts aside?
Will Betty be the one who he loves truly
Or will it be the one who we'll call L-L-Lulie?
He must decide, he must decide
Even though I made him up he must decide
Saw Santa Claus, he said hello to Ross,
And please tell Joey, Christmas will be SNOWY!!!!
AND RACHEL AND CHANDLER,
(mumbling)----ANDLER!
Even her eyelashes
Are resting in a little yellow jaaaaaaar
But sometimes when it's breezy
Or if I'm feeling sneezy
(interrupted by two guys talking loud)Excuse me, excuse me, noisy boys!
How was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen
La-la-la-la-la-la-la...
As long as you have brain waves
I'll be there to hold your hand.
Though we just met the other day
There's something I have got to say...
"I'll do what I can"
And the rest of the rats played maracas
But to me that is not scary
Cause I stay away from dairy
La-la-la-la-la-la...
They found their bodies the very next day...
Soon they'll grow up and resent you so much
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why
And you cry and you cry and you cry
And you cry and you cry...
And he won't let me work!
And I hate Central Perk!
(time passes by)
And you're all invited to bite me!
I don't need your charity!
And sometimes men love men
Then they are bi-sexuals
Though some might say they're kidding themselves
La-la-la-la-la-la...
When you'll want to sleep with people
Just to make them like you
But DON'T
Cause that's another thing that you don't wanna do
That's another thing that you don't wanna do
sixty-six colors of my bedroom
I don't need your charity
