At least opening this northern version hadn’t been the three ring circus Lubbock had been. We’d had squadrons of brawn stalking around waiting for trouble and trouble, personified by George Cole, stalking around looking for an opportunity. We’d had Sam, lurching about like a cut-rate Boris Karloff, we women bouncing off walls and torso in full estrogen overdrive... no, this was much nicer. Elmore was holding forth behind the bar, Jade was minding the security cameras and talking to Ryan via two-way radio, Bill was ready to go on and me... well, I was at loose ends. As for our Sam, nobody knew where he was. It was assumed, at least by me, that he was somewhere working off pressure from the bomb that my son had dropped on him. My guess was that Cole would be in a world of hurt very soon.

Bill:  Ready to rock, baby?

Deb:  Oh, be quiet, you fake.

He grinned.  It didn’t hurt a bit.  I’d been mashed up against 
the chickenwire too many times to fool him.  

Deb:  Do “Rap Mama Goose” tonight I’ll be able to deck you right in 
the face... you didn’t hang any chickenwire, doofus.

Bill:  No danger of that, baby.  I hired us a front man.

Deb:  You hired a front man?

The grin widened into a smirk.

Bill:  That’s right.

That scared me.  Who had he conned.... Jack from Jack Knife
and the Sharps?  Had Mick Sterling been asked to leave the Stud 
Brothers at home?  Had the wiseass gone out and located Wallace 
of Wallace Hartley and the Titanics?

Bill:  You might have heard of him... some punk from Indiana.

The only punk from Indiana I could think of was John Mellencamp 
and that was impossible.

Deb:  Yeah, yeah, Strannix.  

If nothing else, I would play the game.  He was slapping the 
Hohner into the palm of his free hand and rocking restlessly from 
one heel to the other.  

Deb:  What’s his name?

Bill:  John... John...

Bill feigned a memory loss.  I knew he was yanking my chain 
because he never forgot a thing.  I glanced up at the stage. 

Deb:  Hiatt?

I was stunned.

Bill:  Yeah, that’s it.  John Hiatt.  You heard of him?

He knew the answer as well as I did I had begged them to add 
‘Tennessee Plates’ to their repertoire.

Deb:  Hiatt?

I wandered into the office.  Bill Strannix, pulling who knew 
how many strings to get John Hiatt...yet a public display of 
thanks would send him hightailing it for the stage.  I stopped 
in the door. Jade was listening to “Stolen Moments”.  

Deb:  Hiatt.

I pointed in a vaguely stageward direction.

Jade:  No, right there... 

She gestured, distracted, at the computer.  It was playing her CD.

Jade:  Ryan, you’re supposed to be stopping fights, not starting 
them...

I heard a crackle of static and the single word, ‘Guinness’. 

Deb:  Hiatt.

I did my pointing act again.

Jade:  You okay?

Deb:  Hiatt.

I was flailing.  I looked like Lucille Ball having one of her
trademark seizures at sight of some 'Z' grade celebrity, but I
couldn't seem to help myself.

Jade turned fully to me.

Jade:  Hiatt.  Sure.

She was blunt.  The security camera switched images, showed 
the stage.  Mutely, I pointed at the image.  She turned to it 
and she comprehended what she was seeing, the green eyes went
wide and glassy.

Jade:  Hiatt?

Deb:  Hiatt.

She sighed happily.

Jade:  Hiatt.

I agreed.

Deb:  Hiatt.

Jade:  Bill got Hiatt?

Deb:  Bill got Hiatt.

Elmore stuck his head in.

Elmore:  You two feelin’ okay?

Deb and Jade:  Hiatt.

Elmore:  Oh, hell.

Elmore ducked back out.

Ryan stood like a statue, scowling out of the crowd.  
They were whipped up but seemed harmless enough to Jade 
and me.  We were bouncing along, Jade was grinning 
helplessly and I felt an equally foolish expression on 
my own face.  When I bothered to look over at Bill, he was
expressionless, save for the cramp-like spasms that would 
cross his features from time to time. But something about 
his carriage suggested self-satisfaction.  Another one of 
his kindnesses disguised as a stunt.  Okay... I would have 
to disguise my gratitude as... oh... something.

Gaerity started to get on our nerves.  He looked like 
someone was beating him with clubs.

Deb:  What’s his problem?

Jade:  Who... what... Ryan?

Deb:  Yeah, look at him.

Jade spared him a quick glance.

Jade:  Hell, it’s not Irish music, damned if I know.  
‘Kevin Barry,’ U2, it’s all the same shit.

She returned her attention to her fellow Hoosier.  
I threaded my way over to Security.

Deb:  Hey...

I nudged him.  His arms were folded across his chest.  
I knew if he lowered them the muscles in his chest would 
ripple most compellingly and the bimbos would be compelled.  
Jade, if she bothered to notice, would be amused.  Ryan, 
if he bothered to notice, would be annoyed.

Deb:  Hey!

I nudged him harder.  He rocked on his heels but didn’t 
stumble.  He did shove his hair out of his eyes, and turned 
them sharply on a squealing bunch of suburban yuppie females.  
The squealing ceased as though it as been choked off at its 
source.
  
I gave up and socked him a good one.

Deb:  Hey!  You!  Big Chief Stick in the Butt!  What gives?!?

Ryan caught me around the waist.  To other eyes, he was 
simply giving me a brotherly squeeze. I thought he was going 
to kill me.

Ryan:  Mind ye don’t get yerself hurt, lass.

Deb:  Turn me loose, you fuck! 

I swatted his chest.  Behind me, Jade was laughing.  Hiatt 
had punched into ‘Your Dad Did’ and I wanted to bounce.  Instead 
I was twitching like a stabbed fish.

Ryan:  Ever get anything in here a man can listen to?

Deb:  Hell if I know, you twit, leggo, I can’t breathe!

He was deliberately clamping down, more as a show of strength 
than as an attempt to do me any damage.  I pushed fruitlessly 
against the big arm then, in a happy accident, jammed his cap
down over his eyes.  He dropped me to go to work on the cap and 
I lunged back to my spot beside Jade.  When I turned my attention 
to Bill, he was laughing like hell.

I was excited!  I saw what appeared to be salvation in the 
form of Sam Gerard, shouldering his way through the crowd.  He 
wore a simple t-shirt, emphasizing his powerful musculature, 
jeans and boots.  I thought he was slumming.  I headed for him, 
thinking that he would be just what we needed to counteract 
Gaerity when he finally blew a gasket.

Deb:  Sam, geez, thank God you’re here...

I grabbed his arm and started yanking.  I got a whiff of his 
cologne.  Sam always smelled wonderful but, on a civil servant’s 
salary, not that wonderful.

“Sam”:  Deb, you do this all the time, when will you learn?

I looked up at Bill.  That fucker.  Strannix was rolling.
 
I dropped the beefy forearm I held and turned.

Deb:  Damn, Tommy Lee, I’m sorry.  You all look alike.

He couldn’t have been too offended.  At least, he was laughing, 
so I thought it was fair to assume he found me amusing.

Deb:  What brings you here?

TLJ:  Bill dropped me a line, let me know you were opening.

Deb:  Leave it to Strannix... Hey... would you mind saying hi to 
someone?

TLJ:  I thought that was why I came, to say hi to people.

Deb:  English majors and semantics, you can all go to hell.

He continued to laugh as I tugged him along toward where 
Jade stood.  She was planted solidly under Hiatt’s microphone 
and had already fought off several attempts to dislodge her.

Deb:  Jade... Jade...

She waved me off.

Jade:  Not now!

Hiatt had slid into ‘Mile High,’ one of her particular favorites.

Deb:  Jade... Ryan’s evil twin is here...

Jade:  Shut the hell up, fool!

Meantime Ryan caught sight of TLJ and barged over.

Ryan:  Thomas!  How are ye, lad?

There was more of the vigorous, skull rattling handshaking.  
Ryan hammered TLJ on the back, and TLJ pummeled Ryan on the 
shoulder.

Deb:  Jesus Christ, you two, neither one of you is armed, knock 
it the hell off.

Ryan:  Lass...

Ryan tried to get Jade’s attention, got a poke in the ribs for 
his pains. 

Ryan:  Pay her no mind, lad.  Elmore’s behind the bar...

TLJ:  How is he?

Ryan:  Carrying on.  He’s a brave lad.  You heard about...

TLJ:  Yes, I did.  He and Sam both were hard hit. Have you seen Sam?

Jade:  Will you two shut the fuck up?

Ryan:  He’s been staying with us at William’s. 

Ryan ignored his woman.

TLJ:  Sam?  At Bill’s?  I’ll be dipped in shit!

Jade, who seemed to have reached her limit of distracting 
chit-chat, lashed out, caught TLJ in the ribs.  It must have 
been a lot like a pigeon flying into the side of Mount Rushmore, 
but he jumped away.
  
She proceeded to ignore the world.  TLJ, though he could 
hardly have felt such a tap, looked as though he’d been popped 
in the noggin.  Ryan was stunned and somewhat at a loss for
words.  As for myself, what else?  I was rolling on the floor.  
Finally when I had managed to get control of myself, Ryan and 
I led TLJ to the bar.  Anyplace around Jade was dangerous.

Elmore:  Tom, how’n hell are ya? 

Elmore greeted him exuberantly and, not for the first time, 
I thought that Elmore was really nothing more than a big kid.  
A damn sharp kid, but a kid.  He had retained some essential
sweetness which simple affection and respect brough out in 
abundance. 

TLJ:  Doin’ fine, Elmore...

I left them to converse and drink, and then forgot about them.  
I noticed when Bill joined them...I always noticed Bill, but they 
seemed to be making such a boy’s night of it that I decided it
made more sense to steer clear, then I found Jade and the Hiatt 
Riot went into full swing.

Jade and I were sent home, and by that I mean kicked out like 
dogs, promptly at close.  We rode home together, stopped at the 
Apple Valley Perkins to put something more substantial than Old 
Dutch Sour Cream and Onion potato chips into our empty bellies, 
and then we continued south.  We spent this time raving about 
Hiatt.  The subject of Tom did not come up, and neither one of 
us cared to discuss Ryan or Bill.  Why bother with the fuckers?

In the morning I had a major surprise when I went to take a 
shower, which caused me to flee in confusion to Sam’s bathroom.  
I was surrounded by his soap and shampoo and I found the articles
comforting.  Sam was the only man in my life who approximated 
normal.  I got Jade and we went out to have breakfast.  On the 
way through the kitchen we were stunned to find John Hiatt
doubled over the sink, running cold water over his tongue.  He 
waved vaguely.  Hewey was snuffling through a bowl of Raisin Bran 
and standing Augustus off.  We fled the house.  The sight of Hiatt 
with his head in the kitchen sink was a little too much to take.

Deb:  Jade, don’t come out here. 

I was used to this, almost, job lots of beefcake festooned 
in hot tubs.  TLJ had assumed an identical position to the one 
I’d found him in earlier, but his color was ten times better and 
a fat Havana smoldered in one limp hand.  That was an offense 
worthy of the garden hose, but Bill would kill me.  

Jade:  What the hell are you talkin’ about?  Where’s Ryan? 

Gaeriity’s ears pricked up at the sound of his name in her 
voice.  

Ryan:  Lass!  Where are ye?

Fucker.

Bill grinned lazily at me and beckoned me closer.  The hell 
with that action.  Elmore watched silently, dark eyes sparkling.  
He’d been present one other time, when I’d sprung TLJ in a hot
tub on someone not expecting the show.  Hiatt had no idea what 
in the world was going on, but he seemed perfectly willing to 
be amused.

Jade:  Ryan?  What’re...?

Jade stopped, her eyes riveted on TLJ’s prone figure.  As 
though he could feel her looking at him, TLJ’s brilliant black 
eyes opened.  He tipped his head back at an impossible angle to 
look at her. 

TLJ:  Gonna belt me again, darlin’?

One long, slow, hot grin later--I nudged Jade.

Jade:  Eeep.

Deb:  Goddamnit!

For some reason probably connected to Bill, TLJ no longer 
intimidated me much.  If I could live successfully in the 
center ring of Circus Maximus Strannix, I could certainly 
handle a pissant actor like Tommy Lee Jones.  I grabbed him 
by the back of his big head and shoved him under water before 
he could react.  Yelling, he surfaced and scraped hair and 
water out of his face. Elmore cackled delightedly and pounded 
an equally amused Bill on the back.  Ryan grinned, his eyes, 
as always, never straying far from Jade.

TLJ:  What the hell was that for?

Deb:  Being an ass.

Elmore:  A big ass.  He’s from Texas, Ma, don’t forget.

Deb:  Thank you, Elmore.  That was for being a Texas-sized ass.

TLJ:  Son of a bitch!  What happened to the scared little thing
standing in the road trying to hide behind Sam Gerard because 
she didn’t want me to see her?

What had happened to that little goof?  Hell, what hadn’t 
happened to her?  In a year’s time I had been part of or through 
so much that sometimes I didn’t think the scared little goof 
existed anymore.  And I had mistaken TLJ for so many people who 
didn’t scare me that the mystique and the fear had utterly gone 
out of his presence.

I pointed at Bill.  That seemed as good an answer as any.  
Strannix inclined his head gravely, but he was ready at any 
time to burst into hoo-raws.

Ryan:  Jade?

Ryan’s lilt got my attention.  A big arm rose from the gently 
bubbling water and reached for her.  She wanted to go, it was 
easy to see that she craved the security of his arms, but going to
Ryan meant having Tom on one side and Hiatt on the other side of 
Ryan and that was far too much of a good thing too close.

Ryan:  Mo chroi, are you alright?

Jade:  Eeep.

The backs and shoulders and torsos did take some getting 
used to, not to mention Hiatt watching it all as though it 
were better than anything he had ever seen on television.  
Jade looked trapped.

Deb:  C’mon inside.  We can let these idiots simmer.

TLJ:  Idiots!  You plan on letting her talk to us that way, Bill??

Bill:  Ain’t managed t’shut ‘er up yet.

Deb:  You heard me, Mr. Hasty Pudding.  Idiots.

I poked him under water again and when he surfaced, he 
had the slick look of a seal.  He started to stand up and 
knowing as I did that Jade was about shot the way it was, 
I dragged her bodily to the house.

Sam was moving slowly across the kitchen.  He appeared 
not to have slept at all since he’d blown out, but his eyes 
were calm.  They were also hard and I didn’t think I wanted 
to be the one to have put that expression in them, but they 
were above all calm, as though he finally knew what he had 
to do and was just waiting to do it.

Jade and I both pounced on him, hugged him fiercely in 
welcome and tried to encourage him to go join the rest in 
the hot tub.

Deb:  Jade, y’know what you call Bill Strannix and his pals 
sitting around in a circle?

Jade:  I’m afraid to ask.

Deb:  A Dope Ring.

Sam:  I just wanna sleep, girl.  You think you can make sure 
nobody bothers me?

Jade:  Sure, Sam.  No problem.

Jade’s voice was gentle and she gave him a confident smile.  
I had watched this young former IRA member guard Ryan’s rest 
a time or two.  Anybody who messed with her would draw back a 
bloody stump.

Sam:  That redhead of yours, the little one, turns up I want 
to see him.  They still here?

Deb:  They got bored and we haven’t seen anything of Cole lately.  
Bill decided it was finally safe.

Jade:  Bill was tired of that middle one calling him phat.

Sam:  Keep the rest of those goofy bastards outa my hair for 
a while.

Sam turned to go to his room and I leaned towards Jade, 
speaking in a confidential voice.

Deb:  Must be next month.

Jade:  What the hell?

Deb:  He stayed on the trail and now he’s going to sleep, so 
it must be next month.

Sam marched back to me and, without a word, picked me up 
and carried me to the hot tub.  I went in clothes and all.  
Sam just hated 'US Marshals' references.

Sam slept the rest of the day.  Bill took Hiatt and TLJ 
back to into town but not until TLJ had said goodbye to us 
both.  He leaned over Jade’s hand and kissed it cautiously.

Deb:  What’re you so jumpy for?

TLJ:  She whacked me with that hand and I believe I should show 
it proper respect.

Deb:  You just don’t want another one, do you?

TLJ shook his head gravely, surpressing a snicker.

Deb:  She’s got another one, also feet.  I don’t see where you 
think phony chivalry is going to save your cracked butt.

I went to boot him in the fanny but he deftly caught my foot 
in his free hand and tipped me over onto my ass.  Bill loved it.  
I set the dogs on them.

We heard Sam moving around in the late afternoon, and a good 
thing, too.  When the phone rang, it was for him.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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