Dick- (talking on the phone) I can't believe it! Do you know who did it? Thanks...bye.
Nester- What happened Dick?
Dick- You will never believe what happened! You remember Dicky right??
Nester- The big producer that did your movies and gave you the studio?
Dick- Yeah, well he passed away in the hospital last night! The doctor says that he suspects foul play.
Dick sits up and Nester looks at Dick in amazement.
Nester- Do they know who might have done it?
Dick- They have no idea as of now, but the police promised to find out what happened. I can't believe that someone like Dicky would have enemies. I mean, he was a harmless producer of hardcore porn...who would want to kill him? We have to win the match at Malice...for Dicky.
Nester- Maybe it was the Mafia. I heard that in the 80's the Mafia ran the adult industry. Maybe the Mafia was trying to get back at Dicky for taking the industry from the hands of "La costra nostra"
Dick- Wow Nester, you sure do know your porn history!
Nester- Yeah, I watched the John Holmes "E! True Hollywood Story". It kinda reminds me of the movie "Boogie Nights".
Dick- Well it was somewhat based on the John Holmes story.
Nester- I think that Holmes died of like AIDS or something?
Dick- Thats what you get for making gay porn.
Nester- He did gay porn too?!?
Dick- Yeah, you didn't know that...
While the two are talking they are interupted by the phone again.
Nester- The phone is ringing like its a frickin' telethon man.
Dick answers the phone and does not say anything the whole time. After a few minutes Dick hangs up the phone. Dicks face is white, and he is noticably trembling.
Nester- For Gods sake what did they say.
Dick- It was the police...they said that they went to the studio and did some looking around. They went into a part of the studio that has not been opened in years. They said that there was evidence that a "snuff" film may have been made in MY studio!
Nester- What the hell is a "snuff" movie?
Dick- It is a movie where you kill the person that you perform with at the end.
Nester- My God! I can't believe that stuff like that even exsists!
Dick- Yes, it does. That is only the half of it. The police also found Dickys private stash of old, rare videos that he made when he was starting out in the business. You will never believe what the cops found in an unmarked box...CHILD PORNOGRAPHY!
Nester- WHAT! This situation just keeps getting stickier and stickier.(Nester laughs to himself)
Dick- This is no time for jokes Nester! That is all you do...joke around! Like that film that I did with Jenna Jameson. I wanted to call it "Dick does downtown Detroit", but you insisted that we called it "Dick does Jarreds mom". Did you listen to what Jarred said? His parents are dead! My mom is dead too, remember. Mommy died in Spain, while she was following her dream to be the biggest bullfighter in all of Madrid. Then, there is that time when you got us kicked out of XWF for the now infamous "Your Momma" stunt! What is it with you and moms Nester? Maybe we should call you edipus. We have to win at Malice for Jarreds mom, and my mom, and your mom Nester...we have to win that match for moms across the globe!
Nester- What?! That doesn't even make any sense. Where do you come up with things like that? I think you made it up.
Dick- Whatever Nester. The police want to talk to me tomarrow about Dicky...
Nester- What do you think will happen to the studio when everything is said and done?
Dick- I don't know, but I hope they don't shut the place down for a little kiddie porn, and a couple of dead people. Maybe we should get ahold of my team of lawyers.
Nester- I think you should get Johnny Cochrine!(laughs)
Dick- Goddamnit Nester!
The two nastiest sons of bitches in the world cackle at Nesters zaney oneliners.
