I am in love with Joss Whedon. Now I know he's married, and I really mean no disrespect to his wife and their marriage, but I think that Joss and I would make the perfect couple. Before I start sounding like some insane stalker, (which I would like to point out that I am not as of this date), let me clarify things just a bit.Joss is a funny guy, and I think anyone who watches the show gets that. But, I think Joss is more than funny. He's the epitome of smart and cool. His dialogue is really hilarious, especially Xander. And, since Xander is supposed to be Joss, and I love Xander more than life, it seems an obvious extension of affection is in order. If you have never read Joss's posts to the PB, you are missing out. He's beyond insane. In a good way. Example, re: "The Wish" and "Amends" (his ep):
"By the by, here's the part I hate. My ep is next. No way it holds up to this one. That sux. (Note to self: kill Greenwalt.) (and Noxon.) (give self raise.) (Bathe ferret.)"Besides all that crap, Joss is a cutie. Our children would be just lovely and that kind of stuff is important to consider nowadays. I wouldn't just off and marry someone with inferior genes, to be sure. He definitely has some good stuff to pass down to the next generation, his sparkling wit being just one example. You know how sometimes you can just TELL that you would be perfect with someone? I can tell. Joss's writing reveals a lot about him, and I like what I see.
So here's my plea: Joss, I'm young, pretty and smart. I have rather large breasts. I can go blonde if necessary. Please let me be your trophy wife. You're getting to the point in your career where you need to do something like this, like Cameron did after suck-ass Titanic. I pledge my seldom waning devotion to you and dream of the day when you will brag to all of your little friends about doing it 5 times a night, like you were 20 again.
