MY VAMPIRE LOVER
PLOT-A female vampire moves into a small town and quickly begins using her lesbonic powers to seduce & destroy the local hotties.
VIOLENCE-Two small bite marks are seen on someone's throat. Several people are bitten, and one is staked in the heart, but no blood is shown.
SEX/NUDITY-Mega mega lesbian softcore all through the movie. I think the secretary at the cable company was the only female cast member that didn't get completely naked and lesbonic in this film.
WHY I BOUGHT IT-I saw the preview for this on another Seduction Cinema DVD, and noticed that it featured a lot of my favorite actors from their rostor. Plus, there was a shot of some dude making a hilarious kung-fu stance holding a stake in front of a naked vampire woman, and that sold me. Seduction hasn't put out a decent comedy in a while, so I figured I'd give it a shot. The lead role is played by Paige Richards, who got the honor of playing the EROTIC WITCH herself in WITCHBABE earlier this year. Also, several of the cast from EROTIC WITCH 2 are in this: Allannah Rhodes, Katie Jordon, and the incredible Darian Caine (who plays a plumber that says "yes" to crack!). Esmerelda Dellarocca and Misty Mundae (EROTIC SURVIVOR) are back as well. Also, Syn DeVil (the only good thing about EROTIC SURVIVOR 2) has a pretty big role as the vampire's neighbor. She's built a lot tougher than most of the Seduction girls, which is cool. There are decent moments of humor to be found as well, but the main thing that makes MY VAMPIRE LOVER worth your money is that it's fairly long compared to most Seduction releases. At the very least, you'll have many lengthy girl/girl scenes to drool over.
WHAT I DIDN'T LIKE-I don't mean to sound like I'm bitching, because lord knows I do not hold these movies to the same standard as I would, say, a Jim Carrey comedy or something. I also realize full well that the reason people buy these is to see the sex, and they don't give a crap about plot or acting or the shit that happens between the screwing. However, I cannot help but hold these movies to the standard set by the first wave of Seduction Cinema titles. Films like MISTRESS FRANKENSTEIN, GLADIATOR EROTICUS, EROTIC SURVIVOR, EROTIC GHOST, VAMPIRE'S SEDUCTION and the incredible EROTIC WITCH 2 are some of the sexiest and funniest low-budget movies I have ever seen. I just can't help but think that maybe they gave up making the films be anything but softcore lesbo romps because people responded negatively to how much effort was being put into other aspects of production. Like, say, energetic performances or decent jokes. Last year's PLAYMATE OF THE APES came close to fitting the bill, but most everything this company has released in the past year has been miles away from the quality these films once had. I continue to purchase Seduction Cinema DVDs in hopes that I'll see something really cool again.
MEMORABLE SCENES-The part where Darian Caine plays the plumber coming to fix the vampire's pipes is great, mostly because of how naturally uninhibited Darian is. She's not afraid to be very silly and go over the top in these films, which is the reason why I like to watch her so much. When she walks into the kitchen wearing her tool belt, with her ass crack showing just like Dan Aykroyd used to do in SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE in the 70's, you cannot help but laugh. She's the shit, and it's sad that her roles have significantly decreased in Seduction films these days. I guess she's busy (???).
DVD NOTES-Along with the decent-length movie, there's a making-of feature )that basically just shows them filming the sex scenes, although there are a couple bloopers to be found). Also, you get a deleted lapdance scene, which I guess was taken out because the actor receiving the dance didn't seem to want to get naked. Other than that, there's several trailers to look through (including a new one for the long-awaited VAMPIRE VIXEN, sequel to VAMPIRE'S SEDUCTION).

(September 2002) 1