Our Version of Pinnochio

Once upon a time there was a boy who had a very big

nose. He resembled most people’s idea of Pinnochio. One day

a fairy came along and heard him say, "I wish I weren’t a real boy! I don’t want to go to school!" So the fairy went up to him and said,

"Shut up you lazy bastard. You hardly ever worked a day in your life." Then she flew away. The boy decided to run away. Soon he met up with a

hooker named Mrs. Slokem. She showed him how to

smoke pot. Soon, he was as fucked up as she was. She invited him to her house for a drink and

dyed his hair as many different colors as hers. He liked this, but of course he was stoned. As thanks, he took her to her bedroom and

shut the door. He asked her a very personal question. He said, "Can you teach me to be a lover?" She answered him saying,

"Hell no! I can’t do shit, myself!" He was very disappointed, but he

kissed her goodbye and went in search of someone who would teach him to be a lover. Of course he didn’t leave without some pot.

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