Welcome To Zeltros by Alice J. Capen (takes place 7 years before TPM)   Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi escort an ambassador to the hedonistic planet of Zeltros. ~  	This was considered one of the more pleasurable missions for both Jedi and bureaucrats.  An all expense paid vaca -- err -- business trip to Zeltros. 	In all of recorded history, there has never been a delegate who complained when assigned Zeltros duty. 	When Qui-Gon heard he and his padawan were to go to Zeltros to escort an ambassador on a good-will visit, he did not bother to hide his smile. Obi-Wan did a better job with masking his emotions until he was alone with his master in their quarters. 	Obi-Wan let out a guffaw.  "Zeltros??" 	"You'd better bone up on its history." smiled Qui-Gon. 	"I've been doing that since I reached puberty." laughed the padawan.  ---------    	When the Brianna landed at the capital city of Zeltros, the inhabitants quickly surrounded the ship.  They knew that an ambassador and two Jedi were onboard, which to them meant only one thing:  fun. 	The ramp was barely allowed to open all the way when imaginatively clad women and men -- mostly women -- rushed up the ramp to take a look at their visitors.  The ambassador was the first they met.  When they saw Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan though, they attacked the Jedi with so much enthusiastic affection, that Qui-Gon lost his footing and fell.  He and the ruby skinned Zeltrons covering him slid down the ramp, knocking the ambassador off his feet.  Qui-Gon, the ambassador and Zeltrons landed in a heap at the bottom of the ramp.  Obi-Wan, who was surrounded by his share of natives, tried his best not to burst out in laughter.  He fought hard to keep up the appearance of serene dignity, but the muscles in his face began to ache from the strain and tears welled up in his eyes as he watched his master struggle to extricate himself from under the pile of adoring Zeltrons. 	One of the women who held Obi-Wan misunderstood Obi-Wan's tears and cooed,  "What's the matter, Sugar Berry, did your handsome friend leave without you?" 	Her interpretation of "leave" exasperated Obi-Wan's emotional struggle and he squeaked out a whimper. 	The ambassador stood up and brushed himself off while arms of a Zeltron wrapped around him.  Qui-Gon was still trying to stand up.  He tried to employ wrestling techniques, but there were too many 'opponents' , and they grasped onto parts of his body that would not be considered normal holding positions.  More than once he let out a yelp.  He know not to be offended, however, as it was not considered offensive by Zeltron standards.  Finally he decided he had to use the Force.  Zeltrons flew up and floated in the air as Qui-Gon got back onto his feet with a sigh of relief.  More Zeltrons not affected by Qui-Gon's use of the Force, crowded around him.  The Zeltrons in the air were enjoying themselves immensely, and some of those around Qui-Gon asked him if they too could fly. 	Obi-Wan made his way down the ramp as his group of Zeltrons hung onto him. 	"You know," commented the ambassador, "everywhere else in the galaxy, Zeltrons are the life of the party.  But on Zeltros, Jedi are the life of the party." 	"Whether they like it or not." smiled Obi-Wan. 	Qui-Gon was now suffering through the ordeal of having his ears kissed and licked by Zeltrons on either side of him.  He had one eye open and one eye closed as another Zeltron was kissing him all over his face. 	"Master.  Is it possible for a Jedi to visit Zeltros and maintain his dignity?" asked Obi-Wan impishly. 	"Why yes, padawan.  Why do you ask?" asked Qui-Gon as he gasped and nearly stumbled as another Zeltron bit something. 	"I'm just mentally going over some lessons I've been taught." spoke a dignified padawan. 	"You're a good padawan.  And now's a good time to --" Qui-Gon suddenly let out a short screech as a Zeltron bit something a tad too hard. 	"Now's a good time to what, Master?" asked Obi-Wan mildly. 	"Now's a good time to help your venerable old master." rasped Qui-Gon. 	"Why certainly, Master." said Obi-Wan with mirth in his eyes.  As Obi-Wan used the Force to prize the Zeltrons away from his master, palace guards marched up to escort the visitors to the king and queen. 	Qui-Gon, his body free of fervent admirers, lowered the floating Zeltrons from the air.  He sent Force thoughts to his padawan. <It would've been nice if the guards were here at the time we landed> 	<I have no complaints, Master.> 	Qui-Gon sighed in resignation, and the three guests followed the guards into the Great Hall where the king and queen were waiting. 	The Great Hall was huge and spacious and was adorned with various artwork and statuary, some from throughout the galaxy, but most from Zeltros.  Great chandeliers hung from the ceiling, and everywhere the visitors looked, gobs of smiling Zeltrons. 	The visitors stopped in front of the royal dais.  The aura of the royal couple was more refined than their subjects'.  Their clothing more tastefully modest and simple in an elegant way.  The visage of both the king and queen was quietly dignified.  They wore the aspect of pleasant tranquillity. 	The ambassador bowed from his waist while the Jedi inclined their heads. It was then that Qui-Gon found that somebody had taken the tie off his hair and that his hair now flowed free.  He sighed inwardly.  He mentally checked the rest of himself to make sure nothing else was pulled off. 	The ambassador spoke:  "Cheerful greetings Your Majesties, from the Senate and all the representatives of the Republic." 	"And greetings to you and the honorable Jedi.  We hope your visit here is a happy one." returned the queen.  "We will have a banquet tonight in your honor.  We do hope that another guest we have will not create an awkward situation for you.  He is Jabba the Hutt of Tatooine."  The queen smiled when she saw the look of consternation on the ambassador.  The faces of the Jedi were unreadable.  The queen continued. "We are aware that he is a slaver, but his visit here is only for pleasure, and we will make sure that he leaves with no one who is unwilling." 	'This is going to be an interesting visit.'  thought Qui-gon to himself. 	The queen made a slight gesture with her hand.  A servant stepped forward holding a serving tray on which was a bottle and five brandy glasses. 	"I hope you will like this." said the queen, "It is fifty year old Corellian brandy.  It has a hint of spice, and is very smooth." 	The servant offered the three guests the brandy, which they accepted, then the servant stepped onto the dais and knelt on one knee as the royal couple accepted their glasses.  The servant then stepped to one side and waited until he was needed. 	Obi-Wan never had Corellian brandy before.  It caressed his taste buds and gently warmed his tummy.  He sent a thought to his master. <This is delicious!> 	<Yes it is.> returned Qui-Gon, <But don't drink more than two glasses of it.  It will make you drunk.  On the other hand,> thought Qui-Gon dryly, <a drunk Jedi is probably what Zeltrons would love.> 	<Drunkenness is vulgar, Master, and it's not something I'm likely to do> assured Obi-Wan. 	<You have yet to be offered most kinds of drinks this galaxy has to give.> warned Qui-Gon, <Someday you may be caught off guard.> 	<Thank you for warning me.>  	The king stood up and everybody in the Great Hall hushed.  The king held his glass aloft and proclaimed, "Let the party begin!" 	And the party began.  ---------  	The choreographed dance was beautiful.  Qui-Gon had relinquished himself to the gentle caresses of the Zeltrons sitting around him.  He was reclined in the arms of another as he watched the entertainment.  He had lost his robe. He didn't know what became of it.  He touched minds with Obi-Wan to keep track of his whereabouts.  Obi-Wan was at one of the buffet tables being fed Zeltronian delicacies.  Qui-Gon's head started a pleasing tingling sensation as the Zeltron who held him started to gently comb his hair.  Qui-Gon closed his eyes.  The sound of the music and people talking and bursts of laughter started to meld together into a soft, pleasant rumble as Qui-Gon slipped comfortably into slumber. 	 ---------  	Gentle Force energy touched Qui-Gon's mind and brought him into consciousness. 	"Master." 	Qui-Gon opened his eyes to his padawan's soft voice. 	"Master, the banquet is going to start in fifteen minutes." Obi-Wan then smiled wickedly.  "And you're naked." 	Alarmed, Qui-Gon sat up with a gasp.  He was fully clothed, except that his multi-layered tunic was in disarray.  The Zeltrons around giggled and laughed at the joke.  Qui-Gon looked up at Obi-Wan with a smile that promised revenge. 	Reluctantly, the Zeltrons allowed Qui-Gon to stand up and start straightening his clothes.  His cloak was still missing.  He looked around for it but could not find it.  He thought about whistling for it, but he doubted that it would answer.  Dispite the nearness of the banquet time, the party in the Great Hall was still going full-force without any sign of abating.  It will most likely go on all night.  Qui-Gon's ears caught the sound of a deep voice that boomed across the Hall dispite its low volume.  It belonged to Jabba the Hutt.  There never seemed to be a lack of Zeltrons to give each guest special attention, even Jabba.  He also had four Twi'lek slaves with him, which bothered Qui-Gon.  Jabba the Hutt was flaunting his slaves on a planet that was a member of the Republic where slavery was outlawed. 	Qui-Gon asked Obi-Wan, "Did you notice that?" 	"Yes.  I spoke with the majordomo about it.  He is reluctant to estrange Jabba as a guest.  He said that as long as Jabba is here just to enjoy himself and not to "recruit slaves" -- those were his words -- they're not going to make an issue out of it." 	"Let's make sure he doesn't "recruit slaves" by keeping an eye on him. Unobtrusively, that is." said Qui-Gon. 	"Master, I don't like the idea of we Jedi appearing as if we're looking the other way while some crime lord is so open about his slaves, and within the Republic.  It just seems wrong." 	Qui-Gon placed a hand on Obi-Wan's arm in acknowledgment.  "I know, padawan." 	Zeltrons started pulling the two Jedi toward the banquet room. 	The banquet room was just as festive as the Great Hall, and was full, but more orderly as people found their place-cards and sat down.  The ambassador and the Jedi were escorted by their ever-present ruby-skinned playmates to their assigned places next to the royal couple.  Chatter and laughter continued as the guests waited for the arrival of the king and queen.  People were flirting with their eyes at the Jedi as others nattered with them and the ambassador about pleasant nothings of no particular importance. 	After several minutes, a set of ornate double doors opened and the majordomo walked through and announced:  "Their majesties, the Queen Ahria and the King Mikoh." 	Everyone in the banquet room stood in honor as the royal couple walked through the doors.  Those guests that the king and queen passed on their way to their seats bowed or genuflected as the royals greeted them.  When the couple reached their seats, they gave warm greetings to the ambassador and the Jedi before sitting down.  When they sat, the guests sat down again. 	Servants immediately arrived with platters and bowls of a large variety of food.  Drinks of each guest's choice were poured, and the conversation was merry as royals, natives and guests enjoyed the feast. 	The native companions of the three guests of honor would not allow their guests to feed themselves.  Instead, the Zeltrons would insert morsels of food into the guests' mouths, or hover close with goblets of drink ready.  The ambassador was thoroughly enjoying himself and luxuriating in the attention. 	Obi-Wan was less at ease.  It wasn't that he was uncomfortable; but it was something he was not used to.  He felt he had to cater to the desires of his native companions and anticipate their movements so as to move in harmony with them.  He would have preferred controlling his own fork and goblet. 	Qui-Gon, who was much more assured of himself than his padawan -- and more experienced -- more or less ignored the drink and food hovering about him until he was ready for them.  He was enjoying the banquet, but he also kept his Force senses tuned to Jabba the Hutt.  So far, the Hutt was behaving himself.  But something tweaked at the back of Qui-Gon's senses.  It was a small, quiet feeling that Qui-Gon could not ignore.  He brought that feeling toward the front and held it there to keep track of it.  ---------  	The banquet lived on into the wee hours of morning.  Most of the guests had, long ago, become rowdy as the never-ending supply of drink kicked much of their sensibilities out the back door.  The party in the Great Hall and the banquet had merged several hours ago into one huge jumble of food, bodies, music and constant voices with occasional screams of hilarity here and there. 	The only thing Obi-Wan Kenobi wanted to do at this point was sleep.  But he could not.  He was too keenly aware of his master's concern over Jabba's motives for being here.  Obi-Wan had studied about the Underworld and knew that their three major commodities were weapons, drugs and slaves.  Of course, it was entirely possible that Jabba was here just for a vacation. But what he gets at home is what he's getting here.  Surely he's not here to "get away from it all"? 	Obi-Wan felt the comforting, warm hands of his master lay on his shoulders. 	<Let's sneak around.> sent Qui-Gon. 	<Yes!>  Obi-Wan loved sneaking around.  But how will they be able to get away from their tenacious companions?  When he looked around himself, he found them to be asleep.  Qui-Gon was wearing a guilty smile. 	"You will find, padawan, that certain skills come in very handy at times." 	Obi-Wan grinned. "And they look so natural lying all about too." 	"Yes.  They now look like half the people here.  Let's go." 	As they picked their way through the banquet room and the Great Hall, Obi-Wan noticed an unusual number of sleeping Zeltrons lying around, even on the floors as if they had passed out from having too much fun for too long.  An unusual number, even for a party like this.  And he knew the cause of it. He looked at the guilty smile his master was still wearing. 	"When one batch of Zeltrons fall asleep, another batch takes its place." explained Qui-Gon.  Even as he spoke, a Zeltron wrapped her arms around him and growled salaciously.  Her expression turned to bliss as Qui-Gon wrapped an arm around her.  Her bliss turned into peaceful sleep as he lowered her gently to the floor. 	Obi-Wan grinned.  "I can truly say that my master's charisma puts people to sleep." 	Qui-Gon could not help but let out a laugh at the joke, then said dryly, "Thanks." 	The many people still partying had not connected the passing out of people with the Jedi.  Though they honored and respected the Jedi Knights as defenders of the galaxy, most people did not believe the tales of magical abilities attributed to the Order -- most having never seen it with their own eyes.  If anyone were seen fainting in the arms of those two Jedi, it was simply assumed the fainters had too much to drink, too much excitement, too much enamored; too much anything. 	As the two Jedi were leaving the Great Hall, they heard people calling to them.  It was a group of five Zeltron women that was part of the original group that clung to the Jedi when they first arrived. 	Qui-Gon grinned his charming grin and waved bye-bye at them.  Obi-Wan didn't bother to smile.  He groaned instead. 	"Come, Gloomy Gus!" said Qui-Gon, "Let's zip ourselves down the corridor before they catch us." 	Obi-Wan had mastered the Jedi art of  "hyperdrive running" at this point in his training, and he and his master seemed to suddenly warp into speed and out of sight. 	The five Zeltrons ran to the entrance of the corridor but found nobody. 	"Oh, poo!!" pouted Llahndra.  "They're gone!  They couldn't have moved that fast!" 	"Jedi Knights are good runners.  They run everywhere in battle." explained Lahlly, as if she knew all about Jedi. 	"We're good runners!" said Stuhfanna. 	"Let's run down there and see if we can catch them!" exclaimed Ahnny 	Rahndy had already started running down the corridor.  The others ran after her. 	The two Jedi had slowed to a normal walking speed as they reached living quarters where guests might stay.  As they themselves were guests, there was no need to look sneaky.  It wasn't very quiet there as many guests continued to party in their rooms.  Most of those partyers had the courtesy to keep their doors closed for the sake of other people who were trying to sleep.  The Jedi were careful to make themselves unnoticed as they passed the open doors so as to avoid being seen by Zeltrons. 	"Master," said Obi-Wan, "It just occurred to me:  where is our room?" 	Qui-Gon slowed his walking almost to a stop.  His eyes focused on nothing as a sheepish smile formed.  "I don't know.  We never found out." 	The humor of it hit Obi-Wan and he started laughing.  He imagined themselves sleepily staggering around the palace all night, bleary-eyed, trying to find their room.  He conveyed that image to his master. 	Qui-Gon chuckled.  "No, no, no.  All we have to do is find the ambassador. Our room will be next to his." 	"What if they'd forgotten to arrange for our rooms; then we'd have to stagger out to the ship to sleep." 	"What's with this staggering business?" 	"We're very sleepy.  And we're droopy and our tongues are lolling out." 	"With our eyes looking like X's." added Qui-Gon." 	"With big dark circles going all the way around them."  Obi-Wan started laughing anew. 	Distant female voices started giggling.  "There they are!" 	The Jedi turned to look down the hall to see the five Zeltrons running toward them. 	"Let's go, padawan." 	As the Jedi ran, they passed the room that the ambassador was in.  The empty room next to his was theirs, but they did not stop.  As soon as they rounded a corner, they again used the Force to speed their running so that it looked like they had gone into hyperdrive. 	The five Zeltrons ran around the corner, breathless, to find no trace of the Jedi. 	"Land sakes, they run fast!" gasped Lahlly. 	"Keep running!" exclaimed Stuhfanna. 	Qui-Gon blew aside a lock of hair that fell in front of his face.  After having zigged and zagged down corridors and hallways, they found themselves in a courtyard. 	"This is nice." said Obi-Wan. 	The courtyard was paved with green-marbled stone and there were fountains. The stars twinkled in the black velvet above.  They seemed to be the only ones who were out there. 	"Unfortunately, we can't stop here.  I know those girls won't give up, and they know this palace better than we." said Qui-Gon 	"Why don't we just put them to sleep?" asked Obi-Wan. 	Qui-Gon sighed.  "I'd rather that we didn't have to keep doing that all night.  Let's go that way." pointing across the courtyard. 	They walked across the courtyard and found another entrance to the palace.  It was there that both Jedi felt a sensation through the Force that told them something wrong was happening somewhere close.  The Force also told them it had to do with Jabba, although the close physical presence of Jabba was not sensed.  The Jedi followed the Force path. 	As the Jedi walked, the sensation got stronger.  It took them down more corridors until they were in what looked like a service area.  Feelings of distress from someone bolted into their senses like an arrow, and the Jedi ran toward it. 	Several dark-clothed humanoids were in the process of abducting two Zeltron women.  One of the women was unconscious from a drug, while the other was struggling to get free. 	All abductors except for the two struggling with the woman, saw the Jedi approach.  They whipped out their blasters, but the blasters were yanked out of their hands by an unseen force.  Most of them had more than one blaster though, but as they reached for them, lightsabers ignited.  Blaster bolts ricocheted off the blue and green blades and the blades swept down to perform their deadly purpose.  Organic flesh and pieces of blaster flew from their hosts.  Some screamed in agony while others clamped their mouths shut in the attempt to not show pain, but their eyes revealed otherwise. 	The two with the struggling woman realized the Jedi were present when the lightsabers were ignited.  The woman gained new courage when she saw the Jedi, and she kicked with full force of her body into the side of one of her abductor's knees.  He hissed in pain as he sank down.  The other let go and ran down the hall.  Obi-Wan sprinted after him. 	The Zeltron looked into the comely, kind face of Qui-Gon, took a few steps toward him and hugged him close and buried her face in his chest as emotional recuperation began.  He comfortingly wrapped his free arm around her while his saber cut another blaster in half that belonged to a man who did not give himself enough credit for being a jerk.  The man lunged toward Qui-Gon, but the Jedi gestured with his hand that held the saber, and the man was slammed hard against the wall.  Two other men tried to rush Qui-Gon to overpower him, but their heads inexplicably knocked together, hard, and they too were slammed against the wall.  The rest of the villains were cowering. 	Obi-Wan's superior athletic ability quickly overtook the running man. Obi-Wan flew into the air, did a few somersaults over the fugitive, and landed in front of him, blocking his path.  The man skidded to a stop.  He sized up Obi-Wan, then looked behind himself to search for an easier escape.  What he saw where Qui-Gon was was disheartening.  He looked at the determined expression on Obi-Wan then raised both his hands to surrender. 	All the abductors around Qui-Gon were either cowering or unconscious as Obi-Wan and his ruffian walked up.  The Zeltron was still in Qui-Gon's arm.  Qui-Gon had hung his lightsaber back on his belt and had awoken the ambassador with his comlink. 	"Sorry to bother you, ambassador, but we apprehended a group of thugs who were trying to abduct two women, and we need security over here." 	"That's what I like about Jedi." answered the ambassador sleepily, "They're always on the prowl.  Where shall I send the security?" 	"We're in what looks like a service area in the north wing of the palace.  I'll turn on a signal from my comlink so that security can pick it up." 	After a moment, the ambassador's voice came back.  "Security is on their way." 	"Thank you ambassador." 	There was nothing left to do now but wait. 	One of the thugs spoke with a smarmy voice.  "Hey man, let us go.  We'll make it worth your while.  Jabba's a rich Hutt.  He can give you anything you want.  Come on man, how 'bout it?" 	Qui-Gon's voice was quiet, but it was like the sound of a knife being drawn from its sheath.  "Shut up." 	A very short time later, a group of ruby-skinned security guards trotted toward them. 	Qui-Gon swept a hand toward the thugs.  We caught these blokes trying to kidnap these two women.  One of them mentioned Jabba's name." 	The Zeltron in his arms nodded in affirmation. 	Qui-Gon continued.  "And that woman over there appears to have been drugged." 	The chief security guard used his comlink to call for medics to attend to the prone woman.   The injuries of the malefacters also needed to be tended to.  He called for more guards to go to Jabba's room to apprehend him for questioning.  Cuffs were placed on the abductors who still had hands.  A team of medics arrived and administered to the unconscious woman.  She was indeed drugged, and as they carried her away on a stretcher, the woman in Qui-Gon's arms had to choose whether to stay, or go with her friend. 	"Thank you." she whispered.  She raised herself on tiptoe, kissed Qui-Gon on the cheek, then followed after her friend. 	The Jedi finished filling out a report for the chief security guard, then after a while, they were alone in the corridor. 	"Our next stop is Jabba's room." said Obi-Wan. 	"Right."  ---------  	The hallway to Jabba's room was quieter than it had been earlier.  More people were asleep.  But palace security and police were inside Jabba's room.  Some were standing about outside in the hall.  The sleepy ambassador walked up to meet the Jedi.  "It was found that Jabba and his retinue had left the palace about an hour ago.  His ship took off immediately after you apprehended the abductors.  The police are considering that the timing wasn't a coincidence." 	The chief of security walked up to them.  "Some of the abductors had confessed that they worked for Jabba.  Those two women were meant to be slaves." 	Qui-Gon spoke.  "I wonder then if those two women were the only one's they've caught.  How long has Jabba been on Zeltros?" 	"He arrived yesterday morning before you arrived." said the chief.  "He probably didn't know you were coming." 	"Bad timing on his part." said Qui-Gon 	The chief continued.  "As far as we know right now, those two women were the only attempts.  Jabba probably thought the chaos of The Big Party would conceal his goons' activities." 	Obi-Wan smiled wryly.  "Speaking of goons; if Jabba heard they squealed on him..." 	The chief nodded.  "They asked for extra protection." 	The majordomo walked up to the group and cleared his throat.  "Sirs, Their Majesties were notified of the rescue of the two women.  Their Majesties asks you for your presence at 2 p.m. today, in the Great Hall.  They want to thank you for your valor." 	"We'll be there." answered Qui-Gon. 	The majordomo tipped his head, snapped his heals, then left. 	Obi-Wan turned his tired eyes to his master.  "May we go to bed now?" 	"Most definitely, padawan.  We did all we could do right now."  Qui-Gon turned to the ambassador to ask about the key, but the ambassador had anticipated the question and pulled their room key out of his pocket and handed it to Qui-Gon. 	The Jedi and the ambassador walked together to their rooms.  They bid each other good night -- or was it good morning -- and Qui-Gon unlocked the door to their own room. 	Obi-Wan yawned.  "Goodness!!  I'm glad to finally be able to sleep!" 	"Oh sweetie-pies!" 	The Jedi snapped their eyes toward the sound of the voice.  On the king-sized bed were the five Zeltron women. 	The two Jedi looked at each other:  "Oh no!!"  Alice J. Capen