Separation (Ending 1)

Set after "Call to Arms" with no regard to actual sixth season episodes

~*The answer is yes.

That's what you've wanted from the beginning, isn't it?

Then when all of this is over, we'll get married.

We'll get married.

When all of this is over.*~

The bridge of the Defiant was dark. Smoke emanated from every console, and there was a quiet hush that loomed in the air.

"Commander " Sisko began hesitantly.

Jadzia Dax pulled herself up from the floor, "Targets destroyed."

Sisko sighed, "Good. Okay people, let's put this ship back together and move on."

Every day, this is what they went through. Moving from one sector to another, destroying Jem'Hadar ships, yet it seemed that they never got any closer to an actual victory. Gul Dukat and Weyoun had no luck in dismantling the mine field nor were they able to restore the computer systems on DS9. Benjamin made sure that he would be the only one able to restore the station, that is, whenever he got the opportunity to take it back. Starfleet didn't see it as a priority, though every single member of the Defiant's crew did.

That night, Jadzia had her usual raktajino. She drank it slowly, letting the warm liquid flow down her throat. She looked up and smiled her mealtime partners were coming. Miles sat to her left, and Julian to her right. Dax briefly looked across the table, yet again the fourth seat was empty. It had been empty for three months, she still couldn't understand why Worf was needed on the Rotarran. Okay, maybe she did understand. True, it is important to have a Starfleet liaison among our Klingon allies, and true, he was the best man for that job, but

"Hey there Dax," Julian sweetly kissed her cheek.

She half smiled. It was hard to get a full smile or laugh out of her these days. The first few weeks she'd been okay, but now, she was turning into a zombie, going through the motions of daily routine, and trying not to dwell on the fact that it had been three months since she last saw her fiancee'.

Fiancee'. Affianced, she didn't feel like she was about to get married. She felt like , like nothing.

"How's it going?" Jadzia asked timidly.

"Great," Miles said sarcastically, "We're at war, we can't see our loved ones', and, the replicators are malfunctioning. What more could we ask for?"

"We're Starfleet officers, this type of thing comes with the uniform," Julian replied.

"Everyone says that, but it doesn't help," Miles replied, "We're not even allowed to send messages to our families'. I know that rule's there for security measures, but, it isn't an easy one to live with."

"I guess these situations aren't as bad when you don't have anyone to miss," Bashir added.

"I used to be that way," Jadzia began, "And even though it's hell being away from the person you love, I wouldn't trade that love for anything."

"Yeah," Miles said dreamily, "I miss my family, but, I'd never want to be without them. Never."

Julian smiled, "I feel a little left out now."

****

"We've arrived at the co- ordinates, General."

Martok stood from his chair, "Good, good. The Defiant should be in the area."

"Should I drop our cloak?" Worf asked.

"Yes, we'll wait ten minutes for her to decloak, and then, we'll raise our cloak again."

The Rotarran didn't have to wait that long. Minutes after they dropped their cloak, the Defiant appeared against the black sky, "Captain Sisko is hailing us, General."

"Open a channel."

Captain Sisko sat in his new office, a small room right off the bridge. Martok's face appeared on his desk screen, "General, you're early."

"You can blame that on our Federation liaison. He was anxious to make the rendezvous."

Benjamin smiled, "I can imagine. The Enterprise, carrying Admiral Netchayev will be here in a few hours."

Martok nodded, "Gowron's ship was held up in the Yerman system by a Dominion attack. It may be several hours, at least six or seven, before he arrives."

"I see. Ultimately, we will be convening aboard the Enterprise, however I'd like to speak with Commander Worf as soon as possible."

"Of course. I'll have him beam aboard."

He nodded, "Sisko out."

Benjamin left his office and headed for the transporter room. When he got there, Worf was stepping off of the pad. They firmly shook hands, "It's good to have you aboard."

"Thank you sir. You wanted to speak with me "

They began walking down the halls, "Actually, no. I'm sure you're doing an excellent job aboard the Rotarran."

"Then why...?"

Ben smiled, "I'm not the one who needs to see you. She told me about your engagement."

Worf nodded, "Oh, I see."

"I'll contact you as soon as Gowron arrives."

Worf turned to face him, "Thank you very much sir."

Sisko pleasantly smiled and nodded, "You're very welcome."

The captain walked away and Worf took a few deep breaths, "Computer, locate Lieutenant Commander Dax."

"Lieutenant Commander Dax is in her quarters."

That didn't help much, "Computer, give me the room number of Commander Dax's quarters."

"There is no record of a Commander Dax on file."

Worf groaned. He'd forgotten how annoying the Starfleet computer could be, "Give me the room number of Lieutenant Commander Dax's quarters."

"Deck two, section five, room 142."

Worf frowned, "Those are my quarters."

Jadzia was lying on the bottom bunk, staring up. She'd been lying awake all night, and it would be morning soon, She couldn't believe it, but she actually missed her Cardassian bed back on DS9. It was larger, and she was used to it. And every now and then, she'd share it with Worf.

"Come on Dax," she said aloud, "It's just like he said. Put aside your personal feelings and focus on the task at hand. I'm sure he's not wasting any sleep "

The shrill sound of her chime ended the personal chastisement. Jadzia stood, crossed the small room, opened the door, and froze.

Worf instinctively touched her face. She closed her eyes and let her cheek wearily fall into his palm. Part of her was afraid that when she opened them, he'd be gone. It was as if this were another one of her dreams. Maybe it was, she had been trying to fall asleep. Slowly, Jadzia opened her eyes, and he was still there.

"When did you get here?" she whispered.

"A few minutes ago. The Rotarran is here for a conference with Admiral Netchayev, Captain Sisko and Gowron."

Dax noticed that they were still standing in the corridor, "Come on in."

"You decided to stay in my quarters?"

She blushed, "All of your things are here, I guess it makes me feel closer to you.

They were uncomfortably silent for a long time. It wasn't as if they weren't ecstatic to see one another, but, how do you sum up three months worth of emotions in a few sentences?

"How long will you be here?" she asked.

"Six hours. Then, I have to go over to the Enterprise."

"Six hours? That's all?"

He sat down, "I am sorry. I realize it isn't much."

She kneeled in front of him, resting her arms on his thighs, "No, don't be. We're fortunate to have this time together."

"I have missed you " he said somberly.

"I know. I've missed you too."

"What do you want to do?" he whispered.

Jadzia got up from her knees and sat in his lap. She snaked her arms around his neck and lowered her face to his. They kissed one another for a long time, "I think we can find a way to fill our time. We always did before."

He smiled at her, "That is what I had in mind as well."

She laughed, "I love you."

"Not nearly as much as I love you."

****

Jadzia lay on the floor with her head on Worf's chest. The Defiant's beds were way to small to accommodate both their bodies, so they had to made do with the deckplates. She slowly intertwined her legs in his and gently kissed his torso.

"I'd forgotten how wonderful your body felt," Dax whispered as she traced her finger along his rigid muscles.

Worf stroked her hair, which now hung freely across her bare shoulders, "Did you mean what you said, back on the station about us getting married? I would understand if it were just words spoken out the fear of us being apart."

She propped herself on her elbow, "Of course I meant it. And, I've been wanting to talk to you about that."

He sat up as well, "What is it?"

Jadzia shook her had, "I don't want to wait. I don't want to wait until this war is over. We could be fighting the Dominion the rest of our lives. I need you now."

"Even if we got married now, we would not be able to be together."

"I know," she smoothed her hands over his shoulder, "But, that doesn't matter. I want to be yours, Worf "

"I know how you feel," he took her hand in his, "Do you want to do it right now?"

Her stomach churned nervously, "Do you?"

"It could be a long time before we see each other again."

"Okay. I hope Benjamin isn't too busy."

They dressed one another, stopping to engage in an excited, passionate kiss periodically. Once they were dressed, they held each other close, "Are you sure this is what you want?" Worf asked her.

"This is all I've been thinking about the past few months. I'm positive Worf."

He nodded, "As am I."

She sighed, and tapped her comm badge, "Dax to Sisko."

"Sisko here."

"Are you busy, Benjamin?"

"Yes, but, I'd really love to be interrupted."

She smiled, "I think you'll like this, then. Worf and I will meet you in the mess hall in ten minutes."

****

Most of the crew was either asleep or on early duty, and the mess hall was empty. When they got there, Ben was sitting down. He stood when they entered,

"I have a feeling I know what's going on," he said, flashing his winning Sisko smile.

"We would like for you to marry us, Captain."

"Of course, of course I will. You know, Gowron's ship won't be in transporter range for four more hours, you have a little time to prepare."

"No, we want to do it right now, if that's okay."

Ben nodded, "Now, I don't know Trill or Klingon ceremonies, if you want to do this right now, you'll have to settle for the one I have memorized Bajoran."

They exchanged glances, "That is fine," Worf replied.

"I'll be right back," he went over to the replicator, and returned with a small brown, shallow bowl, slightly filled with a transparent liquid, "I'll do this in English, it'll be easier for all of us. I'll give you my Emmisarial blessing, you'll both say a little about why you want to marry this person, you'll each both drink from this bowl, kiss each other, and that's it."

They both nodded.

Benjamin began. He spoke of the prophets walking with them, and their lives becomin g one. Worf and Jadzia held hands, and each others gaze. The three of them were oblivious as the mess hall began to fill up for the breakfast rush. The crew was silent, taking a seat and gratefully watching the first bit of happiness to grace the halls of the Defiant since they began their dark mission.

Now it was time for the groom to speak. Worf turned to face her. He usually hated to show emotion in front of others, but right now, he didn't care. For them, the only people in the room were he and Dax, "When I came to DS9, I was probably at the lowest point in my whole life. Absolutely nothing was going right for me. But then there was you bright, flirty Jadzia Dax. You brought a smile to my face when I thought I had forgotten how. You you have been everything to me. You taught me how to love, how to trust, and how to live. You have been a friend to me, the best friend that I have. You are always there when I need you. And then, I fell in love with you. It was not easy at first, you know that as much as I do. Yet, I do not regret any of it. I love you Jadzia, everything about you. I love you."

Dax could barely see him, her eyes were filled with tears. She smiled to herself, his voice gently shook as he declared his love, just as Yedrin said it would.

"I remember when I first met you. I'm sure you remember too, I was flirting with you, just like I would flirt with just about every man I met. But somehow, you were different. You respected me, you were my friend. I fell in love with your courage, your stubbornness, and, and your 'Heart of a Basai Master'. You were right, things weren't easy for us at first, but, we both needed to be loved, and that's what you've given me. You've always been loyal to me, and I know you always will be. You're the conscience and stability of our relationship. Whenever I get a little out of hand, I can count on hearing your stern voice, *Jadzia*," she mimicked his voice, "I love that," she touched his face, "You are so beautiful. Most people don't know that, but I do. I'll always love you," she stopped, feeling the tears in her eyes finally welling over. She wiped her eyes and looked to back to Sisko.

Ben continued, amazed at what he'd just heard. He never knew how intensely in love the two of them were. It was hard to tell with Dax, she was just like Curzon, in love with someone knew every week. That is, she used to be like Curzon, until she met Worf. Worf did an excellent job of hiding his emotions, showing them only to those who they were directed to. They each drank from the bowl and ended their marriage ceremony with a deep kiss and a long, tight embrace. Suddenly they became aware of the crowd they'd attracted. Their crewmates clapped loudly for them.

"We have an audience," Worf whispered to her, still hugging her.

"I want to get out of here," she replied. Jadzia laughed lightly, "I wish we could go to Quark's."

Worf thought a moment, "I have an idea."

They finally released one another. They graciously accepted their congratulations, and tightly gripped one another's hand as they left the mess hall.

Julian stood next to Miles, "I can't believe she's married."

O'Brien grunted, "I thought you'd let go of that, Julian."

"I thought I had too, but, it's just a little disturbing. All my ex- girlfriends are getting married to men that are nothing like me."

The chief smiled, "Maybe that says something about you," he paused, "Wait a minute. Dax was never your girlfriend."

"Well, I like to think she was."

****

The transporter room was empty, "Where are we going?"

Worf pulled Jadzia to him and kissed her again, hard and passionate, "I love you."

Jadzia was out of breath, "Well, yes, I love you too, but, where are we going Worf?"

He walked over to the control panel and entered the co-ordinates, and led her onto the transporter pad.

"Commander Worf," The Enterprise's transporter operator recognized him. He served on the Enterprise- D with him, "Welcome aboard. We weren't expecting you until later, sir."

They stepped down, still hand- in- hand, "We are just here on personal business."

The two of them left and walked down the corridor. Dax leaned against his arm, "This is been the best day of my life. Yesterday morning I was depressed about never seeing you again, and now, we're," she paused, "We're married. I'm actually married."

He led her into the new ten-forward, located on deck ten, forward section. It looked a lot like the old one. It was smaller, but it had the mood that he was looking for. They took a seat at a table near the window, and Jadzia slid her chair next to his.

There was another quiet moment between them. They were both thinking about how they had only three hours to enjoy their wedded bliss, "This changes things," she said.

"Yes, it does."

"When we get back to DS9, which we will, you'll have to live on the station with me, because there is no way that I'm spending any more time than I have to on the Defiant."

"Of course."

She gripped his hand and linked her fingers in his, "I just want to make you happy."

"You do. Marrying me was, it was the most wonderful thing "

"What's going to happen to us? In a few hours you have your meeting, and then, who knows where we'll be? And don't give me that speech about putting our feelings aside. That's a whole lot easier said than done."

"It will not be easy, I wish there was another way "

"Maybe you can request a transfer back to the Defiant."

Worf hung his head, "I have thought about that. But the Empire requested that the Federation send a liaison, and, I am the best person to do that."

"I know," she said quietly, "Well, maybe I could come with you like before "

"Jadzia "

"Okay, I'm sorry, I'm just a little desperate. I miss you so much. And, we're married now," she sighed, "Maybe we shouldn't have done this right now "

"How can you say that?"

"No, I don't mean that I don't want to marry you, but, being separated is only going to be harder now. Maybe we should have waited."

"I think that we will be fine. This can only make us stronger, Dax."

She smiled, "You're right," she kissed him, "You're always right."

Worf kissed her forehead, "We should not be talking about this right now. We should be talking about the rest of our lives together."

"It's just kind of hard when the future looks so dim "

Counselor Troi and Doctor Crusher entered the room. Deanna headed for the bar, but Beverly stopped her, "Deanna, is that, is that Worf?"

She looked to the far side of the room, "Well, it's a Klingon in a Starfleet uniform, it has to be him."

The two of them approached the table. Sure enough, it was Worf, with a beautiful Trill woman leaning against him.

"Worf?"

He looked up and saw them, "Doctor, Counselor, it is good to see you again."

They pulled up two chairs and invited themselves to join them, "You too, Worf, it's been a long time."

"Counselor Troi, Doctor Crusher, I would like you to meet my my wife. Commander Jadzia Dax."

Dax smiled proudly, that was the first time she'd been introduced as his wife.

They shook hands, "Your wife, Worf how long have you been married?" Deanna asked.

"About ten minutes," Jadzia answered for him, still wearing her proud smile.

"Ten minutes? You just got married?" Beverly exclaimed, feeling happy for them.

Dax squeezed his hand, and they smiled at one another, "That's right. We got married on the Defiant, in the mess hall."

"You look so happy," Deanna said quietly to Worf.

"I am. That is, until I have to go to this meeting later today."

"Aah, yes. Netchayev has been dictating orders around here, and she's furious that Gowron is late," Beverly said.

"Perhaps it is good the Gowron was delayed. Had he not been, we would not have been able to get married today," Worf said.

"I, I can't believe you're married," Deanna replied, her voice was still quiet and awestruck.

Worf and Jadzia exchanged glances. It was as if they could read each other's mind, they didn't want to spend their last few hours together talking to Deanna and Beverly, "It's really been nice meeting you two " Dax began, waiting for her husband to follow up.

"Yes, but, Jadzia and I have some, things, to attend to," The two of them stood.

"Well, congratulations," Beverly said.

"Thank you," Worf glanced at Deanna. She was being awfully quiet and pensive about all this. He decided not to dwell on it. The two of them left the lounge.

"Now where are we headed?" she asked him.

"Earth."

"Earth?"

"And I promise, there will be no interruptions."

They rode the turbolift and came out on deck 15. There, they headed down the corridor until they came to two large, double doors. A holodeck, another luxury the Defiant didn't have. Worf entered a few commands into the panel, and the doors slid open.

Jadzia drew in an awed breath. Worf led her in and the doors slid closed behind them.

"It is called the Black Sea," he explained, "It's located near my home on Earth. I came here often, to think or just be alone."

The sky was an enchanting orange color, and the sun was setting along the water's edge. There was a warm breeze and a gentle mist from the water, "It's beautiful," she said softly.

"I thought you would enjoy it."

"You never brought me here before "

They began walking along the shore, "I was waiting for the right time."

Dax linked her arm in his and leaned her head on Worf's shoulder, "How have things been aboard the Rotarran?"

"Good, actually. We have had only one defeat, and that was because we were outnumbered. The ship has been refit, so, it is a lot more powerful. I do miss the Defiant, though."

She stopped walking, "There's something I want to show you," Jadzia began unzipping her uniform. She pushed it from her shoulders, turned her back to Worf and lifted her hair up, "Do you see it?"

"Yes," Worf's fingers gingerly touched the dark brown scar at the base of her neck. It was slightly raised from her skin, and at least fifteen centimeters long, "How did this happen?"

"Hand- to- hand combat," she replied, still not facing him, "I almost bled to death right there on the bridge. Those Jem'Hadar knives are worse than any d'k tak I've ever seen."

Worf buried his lips on the scar, warmly kissing the length of it. She moaned happily and discarded the rest of her uniform. Then she turned to her husband and slowly undressed him. When she was finished, he swept her up into his arms and carried her away from the water's edge. He laid her down, and took a long look at his wife. His wife. Those words made him happy beyond measure. He knew that the chances of them never seeing each other again were great. He knew that these last few hours were precious, and as he made love to her, he tried not to think about the fact that this could be the last time their bodies would unite.

When it was over, Worf sat up. "I will have to go soon," he whispered. Her long, bare body was folded into his lap. He cradled her back in his strong arm, almost like a baby.

"I know."

"I do not think that I will be able to see you after the meeting ends."

"I know."

"Jadzia there is something that I need to tell you."

She looked up into his eyes, "What is it?"

He sighed, "The reason we are having this meeting is discuss details of the next phase of our attack against the Dominion "

"Why does this scare me?" she asked skeptically.

"Several Klingon ships are being sent deep into Cardassian space to cripple the Dominion from within. The minefield is keeping re- enforcements from entering the Alpha Quadrant, but, we must still stop the ones that are already here."

She lowered her eyes, "Let me guess. The Rotarran is one of the ships."

"Yes. Yes it is."

"So, not only are we going to be apart for an immense amount of time, but, you're about to go on a terribly dangerous mission that'll most likely get you killed?"

"Yes."

Jadzia buried her head on his chest. He could feel tiny drops of water against his skin, and he knew that she was crying, "Please, Jadzia, do not "

"I know you want me to be strong, and I want to be too, but, it isn't easy. Dammit, why can't we just get in a shuttle and leave all of this behind? We could find some far away place where no one's ever even heard of the Federation or the Dominion."

"Running is not going to solve this "

"Maybe not. But at least we won't have to deal with it."

"I do not think you really want to do that. You are just upset right now."

"And you're not?"

"Of course I am. But I know what must be done. No, it is not easy, but, how would we really feel about ourselves if we did run? If all of our friends died, and the only reason we survived was because we were cowards?"

She sighed, "I couldn't live with that."

"I know," he stroked her arm and kissed her, "I do not want to leave you."

She pried herself from his warm embrace, "We need to get dressed."

Worf stood with her, and they quickly put their clothes back on.

"This is it," she said, trying desperately to force back another wave of tears.

"No, this is not it. I am going to see you again."

She nodded, "Okay."

"I know I will not be able to make any transmissions while on this mission, so, if you can, I want you to contact my family on Earth."

"You mean our family?"

He smiled, "Yes."

"I'll tell them everything."

"Thank you."

There was that damned uncomfortable silence again. This time, Jadzia ended it. She threw her arms around his neck and they fiercely and passionately kissed each other. Finally, their lips parted, but the intimate embrace didn't end,

"You'd better go," she whispered.

"I love you, Jadzia Dax."

Dax smiled up at him through her tears, "I love you too Worf."

***

"Good work people," Sisko said proudly as he came into sickbay. They'd just beamed up from Neprin IV, where, with the help of three other ships, they destroyed a Jem' Hadar breeding base. Sickbay was filled with bruised, yet proud officers. Ben sat on a biobed right next to Dax, who about to get a large gash in her arm healed.

"Now what seems to be wrong with you?" Julian asked teasingly.

She put her arm forward, "I thought the streams of blood would have made it obvious."

He smiled widely and began scanning her with his tricorder. His smile quickly turned into a confused expression. He slowly sat the tricorder down and began to heal her arm

"What's wrong Julian?" she asked.

He was still wearing his worried look. When he finished with her arm, he took out his tricorder and scanned her again.

"What's going on, Doctor?" Benjamin noticed how pensive he looked. Bashir said nothing, he simply handed the tricorder and let Jadzia read it.

"No," she said, shaking her head. The other injured crew members began to file out, "No, this can't be. Do it again."

He obliged her and scanned her again, "It's the same, Dax."

"No," she jumped up from the table and went over to one of the nurses, "Let me see your tricorder," she said, taking it right from her hands. Jadzia scanned herself. It was the same.

Sisko looked confused, "What's going on?" he asked Julian,

"She " he hesitated, "I think she'd better tell you."

Ben got of the table and walked to the other side of the room, where Dax was, "What is it, Old Man?"

"Old Man? Oh no, no, this would have never happened to Curzon. Not Curzon, or Torias, or Tobin or Joran. Lela, Emony and Audrid, it happened to them. And now it's happening to me. I can't believe this. I can not believe this."

Benjamin eased the tricorder from her hand and read it, "Oh wow."

"I'm going to my quarters for awhile, excuse me."

***

Jadzia paced back and forth. There was a huge lump in her throat, her stomach was queasy and she felt like crying. She kept taking deep breaths, trying to figure out what to do. Dax tried not to cry, this wasn't something that was supposed to make her sad. This was supposed to be one of the best times of her life.

"I'm pregnant."

Saying it aloud made it more real to her. This was more than she could take. They were in the middle of a war, her husband was gone, and she was pregnant. Jadzia thought back to her last fertility suppressant. Since Worf hadn't been around, she didn't refresh her dosage. When he came back on their wedding day, she was so caught up in the excitement that she forgot. A few days later, she thought about it, but figured her last dosage was probably still active.

"I guess I was wrong."

She opened the drawer in the wall where most of her husband's things were. There was a picture of Worf and Alexander there. She'd never met him in person, but she'd talked to him several times. Often, Worf would talk about how he regretted not forming a bond with his son when he was a baby. He and Alexander never seemed to make up for that lost time, no matter how much each one tried. She knew that the fact that their relationship was so rocky hurt him very much. He often said he wished that he could start over, maybe there was something that he could have done to make things better.

After the incident on Gaia, they talked about having children. Worf told her that he would like to have another child, while she was very hesitant. The truth was, Jadzia had no desire to be a mother anytime soon. Maybe one day, when she was in her forties, but not now. She remembered what a pain children could be, and, there was definitely no room in her life for a full time dependant.

Her door slid open. She knew who it was without even turning around, "Come to give some friendly advice?" Dax asked.

"I don't have much experience in being a mother," came Ben's deep soothing voice.

She closed the drawer and faced him, "But you do know what it's like to raise a child alone. You do know what it's like to be a widow."

"You are not a widow."

"You don't know that. I'll probably never see my husband again. And I'm pregnant."

"I guess for once I don't know what to say."

"And for once I don't know what I'm going to do," She sat down in her chair, "I miss Worf so much I know he'd want this baby. He'd convince me to want this baby."

Ben frowned, "You don't want it?"

"What do you think?" she asked, her voice filled with a cold and callous tone.

Sisko sat down on her bed, "You can't be serious," he stated flatly.

"Think about it Ben. If Curzon had gotten some woman pregnant, which he probably did, would he have dropped everything to make a family? I'm the same person, just in a different position. I, Jadzia Dax, am stuck with this."

He shook his head, "No, you are not Curzon. You showed me that three weeks ago when you got married. You amazed me, Dax, I don't even feel comfortable calling you Old Man anymore. Curzon was never really in love, and you are."

"You're right, I do love my husband very, very much. But that doesn't change the fact that I don't want a baby."

Benjamin smiled, "It will. It'll change your whole perspective on everything. It may take some time, though. You just found out that your whole life is about to change drastically, and it's a bit overwhelming. You'll get more used to the idea with each day."

She lowered her eyes, "I'm alone, Ben."

He took her hands and stood her up, "I don't ever want to hear you say that. Not while I'm around. Do you think I'm going to let you go through this without being right there with you? And then there's Miles, Julian, hell, even Kira, Odo and Quark are pulling for you back on Terok Nor."

"They don't know yet, Ben."

"You know what I mean. And even though Worf isn't here, I guarantee he's thinking about you every single day."

Jadzia smiled, "He'd better be."

"I'm sure you have a lot to think about "

She hugged him tightly, "Thank you. And I promise, I'm going to take you up on your offer. From what I remember, I'm going to need back rubs frequently."

He smiled, "Of course. Although, you're sure that's not going to make your husband jealous? I'd hate to evoke his wrath."

"Don't worry about him. Oh, though I wouldn't tell Julian I'm letting you rub my back. I'm certain he'll get jealous."

Benjamin laughed, "Good night Old Man I mean, Jadzia."

****

News traveled fast on the ship, and the very next day Dax received droves of congratulatory remarks. It made her a little uncomfortable, everyone else seemed happier than she was. All she wanted was for things to go back to the way they were, before this stupid war, and before she got pregnant.

Jadzia knew she had to start making some major decisions. Day after day she woke up with a throbbing head ache, a common Trill pregnancy symptom. Weeks turned into months, and soon it got harder to pull that skin tight uniform over her waist. True, there was never any reason she had to wear a uniform that fit so snugly, she had just liked it that way. It showed off her well- defined body. Now, though, she was all too happy to hide her shape.

Sleep didn't come easily. As it was, with all the anxiety in her life, it took a while to drift off, but every since she'd gotten pregnant, it was even worse. Often times she would volunteer for night bridge watch, and tonight was no exception.

Dax sat there, in the large command chair, and the bridge was silent. Mostly junior officers were on duty, none of which she was very familiar with. And even if she was, she wasn't in the mood to talk. She knew she couldn't stay here much longer. There was a small pucker in the mid- section of her uniform, and she was becoming increasingly aware of the child within her. She couldn't deliver a child aboard a warship, it was unimaginable. If Worf were here, he'd insist she get out of danger. Starfleet gave her the option of staying as long as she pleased, or leaving a soon as she wished. They did not force a pregnant woman to serve no matter what the situation, nor did they ask her to leave. But for the safety of the life she carried, she knew she'd have to leave this ship, and soon.

But where would she go? She wanted to be on DS9, but that was out of the question. Bajor? No, Federation citizens weren't exactly welcomed there, and she didn't really know anyone planet side. Her next thought was Trill, but she dismissed that as quickly as it entered her mind. Her mother had been less than thrilled when Jadzia spoke to her a year ago. She told her mother, proudly, that she was in love with a wonderful man, a wonderful Klingon man. The truth was, she and Elenya never really got along anyway. If Jadzia showed up on Trill, pregnant with a half- Klingon child, she and her mother would spend the whole time arguing about Jadzia's "extremely poor and misguided choice in men," No, Trill was definitely out.

Earth that's where she'd go. The Rozhenko's were ecstatic when they found out about the marriage, and she knew that they'd be equally excited about the baby. As soon as possible, she'd head to Earth.

Dax placed her hands on her slowly protruding belly. It had been three and a half months since her wedding day. Soon she'd have a son or a daughter, Julian surmised that she'd go about seven months, since Klingons gestate in six and Trill in eight. That left four more months to prepare. She smiled, a son would be nice. Of course, to raise a beautiful, strong woman would be just as fulfilling. From what Ben told her, the Rotarran's mission would last about a year. That meant Worf would miss the birth. That meant she'd have to name the baby on her own.

Dax turned when she heard the bridge turbolift door swish open, "Shouldn't you be asleep, Mom?" Julian teased. Sometimes he was just too cheerful.

"I can't sleep, I've tried."

"Do you want a depressant?"

"No, no. I'm limiting intake of unnatural substances unless it absolutely necessary. I'm not even drinking raktajino, which is not easy."

He smirked, "I'm impressed."

"I don't think you came all the way up here to see if I was sleeping well."

"No. I'm a little concerned about you, though."

She frowned, "Why?"

"Well, it's no secret, you're not going to stay this small forever."

Jadzia pretended to be offended, "What are saying, Julian?"

"I don't think this ship is the best place for a pregnant woman. I know how dedicated you are to your job, but, it is my medical opinion "

"Julian."

"Yes?"

"I've already decided to take a maternity leave, so don't worry."

"Oh," he sighed with relief, "Good. I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Thank you."

He smiled at her and left.

***

Jadzia sighed. She wondered if she'd ever get her body back. Dax had gained weight everywhere, not just in her stomach. She didn't remember Nerys gaining this much weight when she was pregnant with Kirayoshi, but, the again, Nerys didn't start and end each day with three chocolate covered cream filled eclairs, "Oh, I look like a horse," She smoothed her hands over her stomach. The pale skin seemed stretched as far as it could go, and amazingly it had three more months of stretching to endure.

The Defiant had been called back to Earth for a refit, and then they'd be off to sector 547, to join the fleet and continue the battle against the Dominion. They'd be on Earth for a week long hiatus. Miles was heading to Japan to see his wife and children, Ben to New Orleans to see his father, Julian was going to see his father in New Zealand, and tomorrow Jadzia was headed to Russia. Permanently. Well, not permanently, just until she could safely be with her husband again. That prospect seemed so far away right now. The way things were looking, Jadzia couldn't see ever leaving Earth. Right now, as she looked around their quarters on the Defiant, the only thing she thought about was the fact that it would probably be just her and the baby, alone, forever.

She put on her nightgown and lied on the bed. She deactivated the lights, but didn't close her eyes. The next morning, she'd be beaming down to Earth.

~

The bridge was destroyed. Jadzia could barely see, but she could tell that everyone around was either dead or unconscious. Her hands moved like lightening across the helm.

"Defiant to Fleet, most of our systems are down, requesting assistance, please respond."

A crackling audio transmission came over the comm speaker, "This is the Rotarran, I am sending over repair crews and medical units immediately," it was Martok.

"Acknowledged."

She got up, and used all her strength to pry open the turbolift door. She climbed down three decks, all the way to engineering. The scene there was the same as the bridge no one was conscious. It was obvious, she was the only one left on the ship. Jadzia climbed the ladder to the upper level, and ripped a panel off the wall and began to try and regain power.

"Dax!"

She slid out of the wall and stood, "Worf!"

Dax slid down the ladder and dove into his arms. He held her there, tightly, lifting her off of the ground as they embraced. Their lips met, and it was like a blazing fire was being ignited. Breathlessly they pulled away.

"What about the repair crews?"

"Forget about them. You and I, we are leaving. Just as you said we should."

She smiled, "I, I'm pregnant."

Worf pressed his lips to hers again, "All the more reason for us to leave this all behind."

He took her hand and led her out of engineering. They ran down the corridor together for what seemed like an eternity. Neither of them thought about anything but each other.

~

The next morning, Sisko entered Dax's quarters, "Are you ready?"

"Yeah."

"Are you okay?" Benjamin placed his hand on her shoulder.

"I had a weird dream last night. I'm okay, though."

He carried her pack for her, "You seem a little shaken up."

"No, I'm okay, really. It was just, it was wishful thinking. Kind of a fantasy."

"Say no more. I'll let you keep your dreams to yourself."

Jadzia smirked, "Not that kind of fantasy," she paused, getting serious, "Don't have too much fun without me."

"Oh, and to think, we were going to throw a party with the Jem'Hadar a soon as you left."

She poked him in his chest, "You take care of yourself."

Sisko smiled, "You too. And you take care of my niece."

"You think it's a girl? So do I."

"I'm going to miss you. It's not going to be the same without you at the helm," Ben paused, "I wanted to let you know, we've been making some real progress with this war. The Dominion still can't dismantle my minefield."

"Your minefield? I could have sworn Rom, Miles and I designed it."

"Well, you know what I mean. Anyway, Starfleet is ready to take back our station. Odo, Kira and Rom have been working undercover for us, so, a takeover is not unimaginable."

Her eyes lit up, "When?"

He shrugged, "I don't know. Four, five months maybe. That's if things continue to go our way."

"I see."

"And, I talked to Admiral Giles. You'll be happy to know that the Klingon fleet has done a lot of damage in Cardassian space. More shipyards and breeding stations have been destroyed. Obviously the Dominion underestimated the Alpha Quadrant."

"Is there any word " she let her voice trail off.

"There have been numerous casualties and loss of ships. The victories have been costly "

Jadzia slowly sank into her chair, "Oh, god no, Benjamin. Please, don't tell me my husband is dead."

"No, no, the exact opposite. He's the one who sent the coded reports to Starfleet. He's fine."

She placed her hand over her chest, closed her eyes and sighed, "Oh, thank you. He's alive," she rubbed her stomach, which was beginning to itch, "He's alive. Is there any chance of them coming back early?"

He shrugged, "I really don't know. I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. What you've told me is more than enough. Just knowing that he's still alive is wonderful news."

"I think it's about time you got going."

Dax nodded, "Yeah, it is. I don't want to have a lengthy good- bye " she quickly stopped and smiled.

"What is it?"

"I nothing," the truth was, Worf had said those exact same words to her once, a long time ago, back when things were normal, "I just want to go, and think only about coming back home to DS9."

"You let me know as soon as the baby is born."

"And you let me know the minute you get our station back."

"Or if I hear anything from Worf."

She blushed, "Of course."

They walked in silence to the transporter room. Once there, they hugged tightly one last time. She silently stepped onto the pad and disappeared.

****

It had been ten months since control of station DS9 was given to the Dominion. Ten long, terrible months. Major Kira Nerys received a coded transmission from Bajor late one night. It was a simple phrase, one she'd learned in her last discussion with Captain Sisko, ten months ago. Before he handed the station over, they had a long talk. In his office, he explained to her what her role was going to be in getting the Dominion off of Bajor. This had nothing to do with Starfleet, he had told her. This was the Emissary, making a promise to his people that he would get them out from under the Dominion's watchful eye. Kira had been all too eager to betray the Cardassians right under their noses without them noticing again.

"Constable."

Dukat generously, or rather, foolishly, allowed Kira and Odo to retain their positions. All this power really was going to his head, he was so confident that his knew alliance with the Dominion was fool proof that he didn't notice the obvious.

"Major," Odo acknowledged Kira. It was early, very few people were even awake accept Odo and Jem'Hadar soldiers.

"I just wanted to tell you," she looked up to the upper level of the promenade where the soldiers patrolled the walkways, "That I'm going to have one- hundred hasperate rolls for dinner tonight."

His eyes bulged, "Today?"

"Yes. I got the shipment from Bajor last night."

Odo nodded, "Your replicator program has been activated."

"Good. Let's get them ready by dinner."

Kira and Odo's code totally availed the soldiers. The message was sent from Sisko to Bajor, and a Bajoran operative sent it to DS9 I would like one hundred hasperate rolls by dinner. It was a simple message, They would attack the station around the average dinner hour, with a fleet of 100 ships. Kira knew her part. Slowly, she Odo and Rom had been dismantling the station's defenses. Their sabotage was easy to mask, seeing that Sisko's memory sweep wrecked the whole stations computer. Any glitches that their handy work left were regarded as remnants of Sisko's's wrath and were dismissed. Well, tonight, around dinner, they'd see his wrath in full force.

****

"I don't want a single Jem'Hadar, Vorta, or Cardassian on this station!" Sisko valiantly stepped out of the airlock, his phasor rifle was ready and in hand, "Well, accept for you, Mr. Garak."

Garak graciously nodded, "I gathered as much, sir."

Sisko spoke to the group of ready and able officers, "Do as little damage to the actual station as possible. Leave Gul Dukat to me!"

No one could contain themselves, they stormed the corridors of DS9, (not Terok Nor) shouting excitedly. There were still enemies on the station, but for the most part, it was theirs again.

Ops was deserted, and the thought that Gul Dukat might have escaped disappointed Ben. He turned his eyes towards the his office. Within it, he saw to shadowy figures, and he could tell they were fighting.

"You've been doing this the whole time! I should have never trusted you and that damned shape- shifter!" Dukat was pointing a disrupter at Kira. Two Jem' Hadar soldiers were restraining her.

"You're a fool Dukat, and I don't care if you kill me. You're losing this station for the last time."

Dukat lowered his weapon and came near her. His hand warmly touched her face, "There was always something about you, Nerys. I've always had a weakness for you."

Kira spat heavily, right in his eye.

"You Bajoran bastard," Dukat stepped back, raised his weapon

And fell lifelessly to the ground.

The Jem'Hadar guards loosened their grip on Nerys to reach for their weapons. Kira reached up and struck one, knocking him to the ground. Benjamin Sisko shot the other guard, and then the one Kira thrashed.

She turned to Ben, a huge smile on her face, "Captain, your timing is impeccable."

He kneeled next to Dukat's body. The Gul tilted his head and barely opened eyes, "You," he managed to say.

"You left me no choice, Dukat."

"I'm glad it was you Captain... and not the Dominion."

Ben looked confused. He had no chance to ask why Dukat feared the Dominion killing him. He slumped over, and died.

Benjamin couldn't believe it. He felt kind of sad, he'd killed his greatest nuisance, and things just wouldn't be the same without Dukat. Yet, he knew that if he let Dukat live, he'd do nothing but wreak havoc for the rest of his life.

Kira angrily kicked his dead body, "You don't know how glad I am to see him dead. There were days, as I was forced to call him sir, and was supposed to follow his orders as if I admired him, when I wanted more than anything to take out my disrupter and get rid of him."

Benjamin stood with her, "How's the constable?"

"He's around here somewhere. I'm certain he's okay. The Dominion knows we betrayed them, but, they'd never harm him."

Sisko looked around, and a huge smile crept on his face. Without thinking about protocol or anything like that, he grabbed her up in a tight embrace. It took her by surprise, but she realized that she needed a hug, especially from him. He was her Captain, her Emissary, and her friend.

Finally the separated, "Welcome home, Captain. I tried to keep the place clean for you."

He laughed, "Thanks, Major. Did the computer freeze initiate?"

She smiled, "Mm, Hm. Your program executed perfectly. We've got all of the information that they put into the computer in the past ten months."

"Wonderful. Okay, well, we've got a station to rebuild."

She grunted, "Just when the Chief got everything running smoothly."

They laughed together for a long time.

****

For once, the fluttering in Jadzia's stomach had nothing to do with the baby. She was so excited she wanted to scream. She was finally, after ten months, heading home. Then again, maybe it would have been better to have the baby on Earth. If Worf was with her, he would have insisted, he would have come close to forcing her to stay on Earth if he could. DS9 was a mess, but, mess or not, it was her home, and it would be her baby's birthplace.

She'd spoken to Benjamin days ago. He voiced his concern about her traveling so far when she was only days away from her due date. Even though he questioned her decision, he assured her that he'd be happy to see her again.

The sight of the station, it's circular habit ring and looming pylons made her heart flutter. The transport ship docked at airlock six. Jadzia felt like she was about to burst, her whole body was out of proportion. She hadn't seen her feet in months, and she had more stretch marks than Trill spots.

When she stepped out of the airlock, Nerys was waiting for her, wearing a huge smile.

"Jadzia, welcome home," they hugged one another, and Nerys took a long look at her, "You look wonderful."

"I look huge."

"Mm, well, I'd be lying if I said you hadn't changed a bit, but, it's normal, you look beautiful. Captain Sisko wanted to come meet you, but, he's got a lot to do. However, he ordered that you go to see Julian before you go home."

"He ordered?"

Kira smiled, "He knew you wouldn't go otherwise."

"He was right."

They walked along the promenade together. It was filled mostly with work crews, welding, building and repairing. Shopowners were re- stocking their shelves, and Garak's tailor shop had opened up again.

"How are you handling all this?" Kira asked seriously.

She shook her head, "It's not easy. I haven't seen Worf since we got married. I'm so afraid that I may never see him."

Kira sighed, "I feel so bad for you. You just got married, and because of this war, you can't be with your husband."

"Does it look like it'll be ending soon?"

"Well," Kira titled her head, "Things definitely are going our way. Bajor, Romulus and a few other planets have dissolved their non- aggression pacts and joined the fight. Re- taking this station is a major plus, but, we still have a lot more to do. The ultimate goal is to force the Dominion back into the gamma quadrant, and, we're a long way from that."

The two women entered the infirmary, and Julian was thrilled to see them, "Jadzia! It's good to see you again."

Kira left Bashir and Dax there. Dax lied on the examination table she'd gotten used to this type of thing.

"How do you feel?"

"Tired, achy, sore," she answered as he scanned her with the medical tricorder.

"You're very close, I wonder if it was wise for you to make such a long trip this late in to pregnancy."

"I'm fine Julian, I'm fine. Nothing happened to me, nothing happened to the baby."

"She's already turned, you should have the baby within a week."

"She?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, you didn't want to know that, did you?"

Jadzia smiled, "No, no, it's okay. A girl, I'm glad it's a girl. Of course, I would be just as glad if it was a boy."

Dr. Bashir folded the tricorder, "Well, that's it, you're in perfect health. I do suggest taking it easy, like I said, you don't have long."

She sat up, "Thank you."

"I can't believe you're about to me a mother. I can't believe you're married."

Jadzia smirked, "You can't believe I'm not married to you."

He blushed, "You know, when we first met on that transport ship, six years ago, I envisioned our whole life together. You'd be so enthralled with me that we'd be married within a year. Then, we'd have five children, all geniuses, and grow old together."

"I'm sorry I ruined your fantasy."

"No, it's okay. I've had that same fantasy with dozens of women."

Dax pretended to be offended, "Oh, and there I was, thinking I was special."

****

"Benjamin, you really don't have to do this. Curzon would have never asked you to do this."

"You're not Curzon. Besides, if I don't who will?"

"I'm okay, really. The pain killers are working beautifully, I don't feel a "

Jadzia closed her eyes tight and squeezed Sisko's hand with all her strength. After the contraction passed, her breathing was shallow and erratic.

"Do you still think you don't need me?"

Dr. Bashir entered the room where Jadzia and Benjamin were. She was sitting in a birthing chair, and Ben stood next to her, holding her hand and stroking her hair. Julian pressed his hands against her stomach and measured her dilation, "Oh, we don't have long now," he yawned, "Could you speed this up, I really want to get back to bed."

"You always pick the wrong time to make jokes. What happened to the inaprovaline? Why did it stop working?"

"It doesn't counter all of the discomfort, just most of it. Anything stronger might harm the baby."

Dax tried to remember her breathing exercises. She laid her head back and closed her eyes. She almost relaxed until another contraction hit, the worst one yet.

"Julian! I've got to get this thing out of me!"

"You're feeling an uncontrollable urge to push?"

"Yes dammit!"

"Okay, this is good," he took his position at the base of the chair, "Alright, Jadzia, Whenever you feel ready."

She pushed down with all her energy. Jadzia felt as if she would pass out, and that was only the first push. Benjamin wiped the sweat from her brow, "Come on, Old Man, don't stop now."

"I can't "

"Yes you can. Just hold on to me, and and think of Worf. He's out there, fighting to make a safe home for your baby. Think of how happy he'll be when he meets his daughter."

"I love him so much, Ben."

"I know you do. Now come on, Dax, keep going."

She pushed again and again, harder each time. Finally, she heard Julian's excited voice, "I've got her, I've got her."

Jadzia exhaustedly closed her eyes. She could feel a deep and overwhelming sleep coming over her. It was as if she were in a daze, she could hear what was going on, but it was as if she were underwater.

Benjamin was the first to hold her. He tried to give the baby to Jadzia, but she was out cold. Dax didn't wake up for another four hours later. She didn't remember being taken from the chair into her own room. When she awoke, Ben was walking around her room, holding the baby.

"What happened?" she asked groggily as she sat up.

"What happened? You had a baby, that's what happened."

He came next to her, and placed the baby in her arms, "You fell asleep before you could name her."

Jadzia stared at her. Her skin was a beautiful golden brown color. She had a line of mottled spots running down each side of her face. Hairline was back a few centimeters, not as far as her father's, but not like her mother's. Her forehead was smooth, but, Jadzia knew that would change. Klingon ridges developed in the first few months of the baby's life.

"My daughter," she said, her voiced filled with awe. It began to tremble, "This is my daughter," the baby reached up and curled her tiny hand around Jadzia's finger. Her eyes were squinted, and she was making gentle cooing sounds, "You're so beautiful," she looked up to Ben, "Is she okay? Did everything check out?"

Benjamin smiled, "She's fine. She's perfect."

"She is. She is."

"Does she have a name?"

"Yes. Her name is Raelyn. I had a hard time figuring out what to name her. I wanted to make sure that it was something that Worf would like. Raelyn was his mother's name, his Klingon mother's name," she smiled, "I hadn't come up with a boy's name yet, but, I guess I didn't need it. I have a beautiful daughter."

@ \ /

Motherhood suited Jadzia well. She thought it wouldn't, but it did. She loved her daughter, she loved being a mom. The only thing missing was her husband, her daughter's father.

Jadzia carried Raelyn in one arm, and had her baby bag slung over the other. She had just gotten off her shift in ops, and picked up Raelyn from the day care, and now was heading home. It had been five months since she had the baby, and, tomorrow was her and her husband's one year anniversary. She tried not to think about it. She tried not to think about the fact that she hadn't heard any news about him since before Raelyn was born.

She entered their quarters, and, just like every day, the first thing they did was stop at the mantle and look at Worf's picture, "Say hi to Daddy, Rae."

Jadzia picked up the image, and Raelyn aimlessly tapped her hand against it.

"Yes, that's Daddy," she continued, "He loves us very much and he's coming back to us as soon as he can."

Raelyn turned from the picture and laid her head on her mother's shoulder, "You're tired, okay. We're going to eat, and then Mommy'll let you go to sleep."

****

Either no one knew what today was, or they were being sensitive to Jadzia's feelings. Everyone left her alone, steering clear of her. It was as if she were a widow, and that was something she refused to accept. Ben politely offered her the day off, but she didn't want to sit at home and brood.

So instead she was on duty brooding.

"Captain," Kira spoke up from the pit in ops, "I'm getting a coded signal. It's masked in background radiation, but it's definitely directed towards the station."

Ben came to the circular table in the center of the room, "Can you decode it?"

"I'm sending it to your station, Dax."

Dax studied the mathematical pattern, "I think I recognize it. I'm attempting to decode it " she paused as she was working.

After a few moments passed, she was silent. Everyone was looking at her, waiting for an answer, "What does it say, Old Man?"

She was smiling. She didn't really smile like this anymore, unless it was at her daughter, but right now, she was beaming, "It, it's for me. It's from Worf."

Everyone in ops smiled, they were all happy for her. They all knew how hard this was on her, especially since the baby was born. Benjamin climbed the stairs and stood next to her, "Is he okay?"

She nodded, and quickly brushed a tear from her face, "He's fine. It's just a short message. He's wishing me a happy anniversary, and he wants me to know that he loves me, and for me not to worry about him. He says he'll be home soon."

Sisko placed his hand on her shoulder, "I know this makes you feel good."

"Oh, you can't imagine. This has got to be the best first anniversary of all my marriages. I have no idea how he managed to get this message out, but, I guess that doesn't matter."

"Why don't you take the rest of the day off, Dax, go spend some time with your daughter."

Jadzia smiled, "I think I'll take you up on that offer. First, though, I'm going to download this message to my quarters."

After Jadzia picked up Raelyn, she went straight home and read the message. She read it over and over again, until she was crying. Through her tears, she read it aloud, "We have been married one year, and I long to touch your lovely face. I think about you constantly, I love you Jadzia Dax. Do not worry about me, I give my word, I am coming back to you, my beautiful wife."

Jadzia made sure all of his things were taken off the Defiant and brought to their quarters. She had his family bat'tleh, his trophies, his pictures, even his clothes. They were all arranged just as if he were there. This message gave her a hope that had been dwindling. He'd given her his word, he would be home. She was sure of it.

****

Benjamin Sisko paced his office. Three months passed since Jadzia got her message, and she'd been walking on air since then. Yet today, Captain Sisko had gotten some news that would destroy her. He was pacing, trying to figure out how to tell her. The war was over, the Dominion had surrendered and agreed to return to the gamma quadrant. Benjamin was prepared to deliver the good news to the station, but, he had some terrible news to deliver first.

"Sisko to Dax."

"Dax here."

"I need to see you in my office."

"Acknowledged."

Within moments, she was standing before him. She knew that expression, something was terribly wrong. His hands clasped together in front of his face, and his index finger formed a point that rested on his nose. He let out a sigh, "It's over."

"What is?"

"The war. The Dominion has agreed to lay down all arms and leave the alpha quadrant."

"That's wonderful! Why the long face?"

Sisko stood from his seat behind the desk. He gingerly placed his hand on the small of her back, and led her over to his couch. They sat together, "The final battle, the one that forced them to surrender it was an all out assault on Cardassia Prime. Everything was destroyed, no mercy was shown. The Klingon task force led the battle, they even fought alongside Romulans. The ships decloaked over the planet, there were at least sixty," he paused, and took her hand in his, "It was a costly victory. The only ships to make it out were two Romulan warbirds. All of the Klingon task force was destroyed."

Jadzia jerked her hands from his. She glared angrily at him, as if he were the enemy, "You're lying," she whispered coldly.

"I'm your friend, Jadzia, I would never lie to you. I just got word from Starfleet Intelligence. I am so sorry, Dax."

"He's not dead. He can't be. He gave me his word, he has a daughter that he doesn't know about. He, he can't be "

Jadzia fell into Benjamin's arms and he held her. She cried, harder than she had in her life. Sisko felt a tear fall down his face, he knew exactly what she was going through, and he was crying for her. He relived the moment he had to leave Jennifer's body under the burning beams of the Saratoga, and how he watched the ship blow up with his wife on it.

"Ben, this can't be happening," she lifted her head, "He died alone, on some far off place. I never got to say good bye. When, when we parted on the Enterprise, he wouldn't let me say good bye. He promised me that I'd see him again. He promised."

"He didn't mean to die. Yet, his sacrifice ensures that his children will have a safe place to live."

"I know that, okay. I know all the noble logistics. I also know that I have to tell his son that now both of his parents are dead. One day, my daughter is going to ask where her father is, and, I'm going to have to tell her that he's dead. I've got to tell his parents, two of the most beautiful, loving people I know, that their son is dead. They are so proud of him, they love him so much. This will devastate them."

"What about you?" he whispered.

"I'm not going to think about myself right now. If I do, I'll die too," she stood, "I need to see my little girl right now."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

Dax shook her head, "No, I need to be alone with her."

***

Raelyn was oblivious to all this. When they came home, Jadzia wearily fell on the couch. Raelyn toddled over to the mantle and gripped her father's picture. Everyday of her life, when she came home, they said hello to Daddy. Everyday except today. Raelyn brought the picture to hermother, "Daddy," she said to her.

Jadzia forced a smile, "Yeah, that's Daddy " she paused. This didn't feel right. This didn't feel like the end. She'd prepared herself for this day, yet, it didn't seem real. It was as if she could still feel Worf, "Daddy... Daddy will be home soon."

****

The next day, Sisko was surprised to see Jadzia in uniform and on her way to the airlock.

"Dax, what are you doing here?"

"I'm scheduled to take the Defiant out and test the new navigational systems. Is there a problem?"

"You don't have to do this. I can get the Chief to command."

"Am I being relieved of duty?" she asked dryly.

He sighed, "Of course not. You know why "

"Yeah, I do. And you know what? I don't need it. What I need is to work."

"Okay, I understand. I do need to know when you want to have the memorial service for Worf. As his wife, it's your decision."

"We're not having one."

"What?!"

She continued to walk and he followed her, "You heard me. I'm his wife, it's my decision. Now, if you'll excuse me, I don't want to keep my crew waiting."

****

A few hours later, the Romulan warbird Nedron decloaked near the station. Major Kira gave them clearance to dock at upper pylon two. The Romulan Commander Terran came into the crew quarters section. This was the first time he'd worked alongside Klingons. He was amazed at how the two parties put aside their differences to get to a common goal. He had a new respect for Klingons, and the Klingons who fought at Cardassia Prime respected them. It was really too bad that most of them died. Terran's life had been saved by three Klingons in the heat of the battle. Their ship had been destroyed, and all of their comrades were dead. So, without hesitation, he brought them back to his ship. They made a stop at Romulus first, and now he was bringing them back to their home, Deep Space Nine.

"General, we're about to dock at DS9."

General Martok was seated at the table in the center of the room, "You know, Commander," he said to Terran, "I have not had a glass of Blood Wine in six months, but Romulan Ale is definitely a good substitute!"

"I'm glad you're pleased."

The second of the three, Lieutenant Tavana, stood, "I don't know about you two, but I am very ready to go home. Even if home is a Cardassian- built space station."

The third Klingon was quiet. He was sitting at the table with Martok, his hands tightly folded together, and he had a hard gaze fized on the table's surface.

"You should be happier than anyone of us," Martok said to him, "You know, he has a new wife on DS9."

"I have not seen her since we were married, over a year ago. I am not sure what I will say to her."

Martok stood and affectionately hit his back, "You and Commander Dax never had a problem finding something to talk about before."

Worf had never been more nervous in his life. It had been so long since he's talked to Jadzia, he was afraid that she'd given up hope. He sent her a message on their anniversary, but the chances of her getting it were slim. So much could have changed. He still loved her, he'd always love her, but, she probably thought he was dead. He tried to tell himself to stop being paranoid. He imagined that she'd spent the year and three months in a total depression, not even able to function without him. Somehow that somber picture was assuring. But every now and then, the picture of her moving on, falling in love with someone else, crept into his head. Or even worse, she could have been killed. Worf knew that DS9 had been retaken and that the Defiant survived, but, she might not have. He couldn't bare losing her. He'd had enough loss in his life.

"Come Worf, it's time to go home. The battle has been won, enemies destroyed. Now, we celebrate."

Worf stood, every nerve in his body was on end. He hoped she'd be waiting for him at the airlock.

"I'm catching the first transport to Qo'noS," Tavana said.

"Perhaps I will as well. I have not seen the Homeworld since before my imprisonment," Martok replied.

She wasn't there. Captain Sisko was waiting at the airlock, looking unusually happy. But there was no Jadzia. Worf slowly stepped away from the gear- like door and looked around. She was no where in sight.

"Commander!" Sisko said excitedly, "Welcome home. It's good to have you back."

The two men walked away together, "It feels good to be home "

Ben noticed him looking around, "I guess you're looking for your wife."

That caught his attention, "Yes, is she here? Nothing happened to her "

"She's fine. She's not here right now, though."

"Where is she?"

"She'll be back this evening. In your absence, she's been commanding the Defiant."

Worf nodded, "How has she been?"

Benjamin sighed, "Not good, but, Jadzia's a strong woman, she's kept her pain to herself, mostly. Though, she was thrilled when she got your message. She misses you, very much."

"Where, where are her quarters?"

Ben laughed, "Her quarters? She insisted that both your names be put on the door. She's going to be so happy to see you. Yesterday, we got the message that all the Klingon soldiers had been killed on Cardassia Prime. I told her, and she refused to believe that you were dead. She was right."

Benjamin entered the code, and the doors opened. Worf slowly entered, "I'll leave you alone."

"Thank you, sir."

Sisko left, and Worf began surveying the room. Right near the door, was a small mantle. It was cluttered with pictures, there was a picture of Worf, and then of Worf with Alexander. Worf narrowed his eyes at the next one. It was of Jadzia, and she was holding a baby, a newborn. His eyes were drawn to the final picture. It was a baby, a girl. He slowly picked up the picture and studied it.

"Oh my..."

Worf began walking around the suite, looking for anything that could backup what he was thinking. He found it, a room, a room with a crib and baby toys. A room with tiny clothes hanging in the closet, a baby's room. *His* baby's room.

"Computer, retrieve the intelligence file for Lieutenant Commander Jadzia Dax."

Worf left the baby's room and sat at the computer terminal. On the screen was his wife's whole Starfleet history. He scrolled to the bottom, "Stardate 51998.1, permanently assigned to the U.S.S. Defiant, executive officer and helmsman 51215, married to Commander Worf 51299, reported date of pregnancy " his voice trailed off, and after a slight pause he continued, "51582 maternity leave effective 51721.5 birth of first child, female, Raelyn 51945.2 Maternity leave ends, reassigned to station Deep Space Nine, chief science officer, " he stopped, "Raelyn," he repeated, "Computer, location of Raelyn."

"Raelyn is in primary care, level 11."

Worf was gone in seconds. He arrived on deck eleven in record time. Instead of going inside, he stood at the window and looked in. She was easy to spot, she was the only half Trill, half Klingon around. She could barely walk, but she was trying. Worf smiled, she was so beautiful.

"Commander," one of the teachers came out of the room, "It is so good to have you back. Your wife is away from the station, but why don't you come in and see your daughter?"

He hesitated, "No, she, she does not even know me."

"She's your daughter sir. And believe it or not, she does know you," the Bajoran woman took his arm, "Come on."

"Raelyn, looks who's here."

Worf kneeled on the ground. The little girl tried her best to run into her father's arms. She wrapped her small arms around his neck, "Daddy's home."

The Bajoran woman kneeled next to him, "Your wife shows her your picture every day. Jadzia wanted to make sure she knew you."

"Mommy's gone," Raelyn told her father.

"She progresses faster than any child I've ever known. She's only eight months, and, she walks and talks. But, then again, I'm used to Human and Bajoran children. She's the first Klingon, and the first Trill, I've had."

Worf studied her face, "You're a very pretty girl, do you know that?"

She nodded, "MmHm."

"May I take her home?" he asked.

"Of course, she's your daughter."

Worf stood with his daughter in his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder, which made him feel wonderful. The only thing that was missing was Jadzia.

****

Captain Sisko called the Defiant home early. He was really starting to get on Dax's nerves. She wasn't ready to deal with her husband's death, yet he was forcing her to. She expected him to be more sensitive about this, he knew what it was like to loose a spouse. He didn't give a reason, and told her to go on home and rest. He was wearing a goofy smile, which seemed extremely inappropriate considering the situation.

Usually Jadzia always picked up Raelyn before she went home. Today, though, she wanted to get some rest without her daughter crawling in bed with her. She was early anyway, so, she didn't feel so bad. She'd be able to get a few hours.

When she got to her door she noticed it was unlocked. She didn't think much of it, Ben probably came by. She opened the door, and heard sounds coming from her daughter's room. She could hear Raelyn laughing, and she could hear another voice, someone else's laughter. It was deep, throaty and unmistakable. Jadzia sprinted to the entrance of the room.

"Worf!"

Raelyn was in her crib and her father had been tickling her. He looked up, and was stricken with every positive emotion that he had ever felt in his whole life.

She couldn't remember actually moving towards him, it was as if she were instantly in his arms, "I know this is a dream, and I swear if Raelyn wakes me up right now I'll never forgive her."

"This is no dream, Jadzia," he gently touched her face, "It is finally over. We're together now."

"I missed you so much. They told me you were dead, how did get here?"

"I gave you my word. You know I keep my word."

She touched his beard. It was a lot thicker than usual, and covered his whole face, "I guess you didn't have much of an opportunity to shave."

"It looks bad, doesn't it?"

"You look wonderful," she turned to the crib, still not letting him go, "How did you find out about our little girl?"

"When I came home, I saw all the pictures, and her room. I could not resist seeing her. I was surprised that she knew me."

"I made sure she knew her father," Jadzia stroked Raelyn's back, she was drifting off to sleep, "When I found out I was pregnant, I was devastated. I couldn't imagine raising a child, especially without you. I spent most of my pregnancy on Earth, with your parents. They were wonderful to me. I came back here to have the baby. This is the only place she's ever lived."

"You should not have been alone. I should have been here with you "

"There you go, blaming yourself for things that aren't your fault. True, I would have loved for you to have seen our daughter being born, but, I knew you were away doing your job," she lowered her eyes, "But, that's all over now," her fingers found themselves to his lush beard, "Come on, let's get rid of all this hair."

***

Worf used to be hesitant about letting Jadzia shave him. He was very proud of his beard, and didn't trust it to anyone. But now, he sat contently, in a euphoric trance. For months he longed to feel his wife's hands touch him the way they were now. Jadzia stood behing him, and his head leaned against her breasts. She used her left hand to hold his face steady, and her right hand moved the blue colored instrument along his skin. Both of them were silent, neither knew exactly what to say. Their feelings hadn't depleted, just the opposite, they were stronger than ever. It was as if they were communicating telepathically, words weren't needed.

Once Jadzia was finished with his face, she loosened his hair and let it fall down his back. It was longer than it had ever been, "I have not cut it since I last saw you."

"It hangs midway down your back. Do you want to cut it now?"

Worf thought a moment, "What do you think?"

"I think it's sexy. But, I might get jealous, it's prettier than mine."

He reached up and stroked her arm, "If you want to cut it, go ahead. If you want it down to my feet, that will be fine also."

She smiled, "I think I'll leave it, at least for now."

Worf took her hands in his and led her around to face him. He lowered her down to his lap and she cupped his face in her hands, "That's much better," Dax commented, "I need to be able to see you," Her husband's fingertips gently moved along her back, sending shivers up Jadzia's spine, "You know, we haven't kissed since our wedding day," she said.

Worf smiled subtly, "Is that a proposition?"

Jadzia laughed, "It could be. If it were, would you accept?"

"Of course I would."

Their lips met. As she kissed him, tears fell from her eyes. She was finally releasing all the grief she had inside herself.

"Jadzia," Worf could feel the moisture on his face, "What is it?"

She shook her head, "It's been so long since we touched I never thought this moment would come."

He dried her face with his hand, "I felt the same way. But it has come. There is no reason to cry anymore."

"I know."

"I love you, Dax."

"I love you too."

****

"I'm not the same as I used to be..." Jadzia said.

"What does that mean?"

"Your daughter added quite a few decimeters to me. I'm not as small as I used to be."

Worf frowned, "What are you talking about?"

She put her hands on her hips, "Don't act as if you don't see it."

They were standing in their bedroom. They'd just had dinner with Raelyn and she'd been put back to bed for the night. It was getting late, and now the reunited couple was getting ready for bed, "See what?" Worf asked her.

Jadzia grunted, " I know you're just trying to be nice."

He brought his hands up to the front of her uniform and slowly unzipped it. They shook gently as they brought the zipper down over her breasts and to her abdomen. Jadzia blushed, she felt like this was the first time he'd undressed her, even though it wasn't. Worf moved slowly, as if he were delicately unwrapping a gift. Her hands joined his as she took his clothes from him. Worf wasn't wearing a Starfleet or a Klingon uniform, but casual civilian attire.

"There is nothing wrong with you," Worf said, his deep voice rumbled as he spoke softly, "Truthfully, I always thought you were a little too thin."

She smiled, "Thank you," Dax's hands touched his chest. Every inch of his body was made up of taut, bulging muscles, she'd always loved that. Her smile turned to a concerned frown. Darkened, raised lines of various sizes covered his chest and forearms, "What's all this?"

"Scars. You were right, Jem'Hadar knives are very fierce."

"You should have these removed."

Worf shook his head, "No, they are reminders of everything I have been through," he reached behind her neck and felt her own scar, "I see you have not removed yours."

"I guess not "

They stood naked, and the only light was from the outside stars. Normally by this point they'd be all over one another, but there was something different right now. Finally, Worf spoke up, "You are more beautiful than I remember."

"You'd forgotten?" she asked sarcastically.

"You know what I mean."

Jadzia looked deeply into his eyes for a long time. His eyes were like tiny pieces of charcoal, and were usually alert and attentive. Now, though, they were heavy and burdened. She watched as his broad shoulders began to sag, "You're tired," she stated, "You've been fighting incessantly for over a year. Even a warrior needs rest," she took his hand and led him to their bed. She laid down first, and opened her arms to him, "Come here."

Worf pressed his body against hers, resting his head in her bosom as a child would to its mother. She ran her fingees through his immensely long hair, draping it over his upper body.

"I never thought I'd get tired of battle. At first, It was exciting and I was very pleased. I had just gotten married and I was serving bravely among my own people. Yet, as the months passed, I longed to get off that ship. The only thing that kept me fighting was my hatred of the Dominion, and my love for you."

"I was able to get away from all the fighting. I'm a little ashamed to admit it now, but, at first, I was not at all happy about being pregnant."

"I can understand why you felt that way. It was not the most accommodating situation."

"I guess I didn't really realize how special having our child is until I held her for the first time. That's when I fell in love with her."

"I should have been there "

"Let's not start that again."

"You never say much about your family, do they know about us?"

"You and Raelyn are my family."

"I know your mother is still alive, and you've got siblings."

Jadzia tensed up, "My family has a problem with the company I keep, and that's their problem. If they can't accept me, then that's just too bad."

"What are you talking about?"

She sighed, "I called my mother right after Raelyn was born. I didn't want to, but, I felt she had the right to know about her granddaughter. I already knew that she didn't approve of my relationship with you, but, I thought she'd put her bigotry aside for her grandchild's sake. But, of course, she didn't. She couldn't believe that I was foolish enough to 'Have a child with one of those barbaric Klingons'. I told her that if that's how she feels, I didn't want to have anything to do with her. I'm not going to renounce my husband and daughter to make her happy."

"You never told me your family disapproved of me " Worf said softly.

"I knew you'd just feel guilty and blame yourself. I don't want you to, Worf," Jadzia wiped the back of her hand against his cheek, "I love you, and what they think doesn't matter."

"I do not want to cause any tension "

She placed her finger over his lips, "Shh, that's the end of that. Now, since you want to talk about family, I think there's something you should know about your son."

Worf looked up attentively at her, "What is it? Is he alright?"

"He's fine. He's not on Earth, though."

"Where is he?"

"Qo'noS. At Oghat."

"Oghat? How did that happen?"

"Well, when I went to Earth, he and I hit it off instantly. He would constantly ask me questions about Klingon heritage, and he finally admitted to me that he wanted to be with his own people, he wasn't very comfortable on Earth."

"Alexander is interested in other Klingons?"

Dax nodded, "Very much so. He said that recently, he'd been longing to go to Oghat, but he knew that because your house was dissolved, he couldn't. That's why he never mentioned it to you. So, when I heard that, I had him enrolled."

"How did you manage that?"

"Curzon Dax's name still has some pull within the empire. No one was going to refuse Dax's stepson entrance into the training academy."

Worf turned over on his back and looked up at the ceiling, "My son is going to become a great warrior he is going to live among his own people, something I was never able to do."

She stroked his chest, "You should contact him tomorrow. He's just as worried about you as I was."

"I plan to. I am not going back to duty right away. I want to go see him, and my parents. Have they seen Raelyn?"

"Yes. Alexander's transport to Qo'noS left from DS9, about a month after she was born. Your parents came with him."

Worf was silent for a long time. Jadzia thought he was falling asleep, until he spoke up, "My life is finally coming together. I was beginning to accept the fact that I would never be truly content," he turned his head to face her, "You have changed my life."

Jadzia blushed, "Believe it or not, you've changed mine too."

"Come with me to Earth. I want to spend some time with you and Raelyn, away from all of this."

"Of course."

Worf pulled her to him. Their long limbs intertwined and their souls peacefully united as they slept. They held one another all night, and never again would they be apart. They were one, and nothing could ever change that.

July 10, 1997

~The End~

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