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Mom went to the doctor today for elbow, he said everything is coming along just fine. He removed her bandage’s and released her to use her arm somewhat, like she can use the walker but without her full weight on it yet. I also had him check out her shoulder, the right one that she broke the clavicle on, it grinds and cracks very badly now days, he heard and felt it and feels it is bursitis which he will not deal with until perhaps next Tuesday when mom goes back to get her stitches out, he doesn’t want to put her through anything more right now, I agree. She is doing pretty good considering everything, still talking about going to the lake the other day too. She even remembered that she had to see the doctor today, that is if it was Tuesday. LOL.
Well, I went in for my blood work today and wound up getting a chest x-ray also. The CBC came back with me having very low hemoglobin count, 7.0 so I got one unit of blood today and another tomorrow, white cells are still down so I had to get another g-cfs shot, my platelets are low and I need fluid again which I get tomorrow also. The x-ray came back a bit discouraging, they found something, however, they aren’t sure what. It could be pneumonia or an affect from the radiation such as scar tissue or the cancer is back. I have a CTScan scheduled for the 9th and see the new doctor on the 16th. I feel so abandoned right now, Dr. Kang was the doctor that told me about my condition and got me to where I am today, now he is leaving and I have to deal with a new guy. I want Dr. Kang there when the results come back from the scan, I want to share the good news with him or have him there for me to cry with. I understand why he is leaving and it is no fault of his own but it seems so unfair, after everything that all of his patients have gone through and now this.
My friend
Brenda in California has asked for us to remember her uncle, George Brooks and she in our prayers. Her uncle has suffered with lymphoma which he is now in remission from but,he has contracted a very serious heart disease which threatens to take him. Thank you in advance.
I was notified by Brenda that her uncle passed away June 16th,
It is 10:00 p.m. Friday night and here I am sitting, waiting for the emergency room to clear up a little before going in. I talked with the doctor on call and he wants to see but not right now, he said the ER is a mess right with a 3-4 hour wait, he doesn’t want me there now because of possibly getting an infection . Yesterday I picked up a very hot plate and put it down quickly, then shook my hands to stop the burning, when I did this I felt something pop and immediately hurt. Now tonight it my form arm, between the elbow and wrist is swollen, red, fevered and hurting very bad. I finished getting my blood, fluids and shots yesterday, all of counts are up again and doing pretty good, now it is up to my body to get to work and kept them up. I go in on the 9th for my CTScan and see Dr. Kim, my radiologist afterwards.
My Mom is doing really good. She isn’t doing much with her arm, thank God, less stress. She talks about the BBQ all the time, wanting to have another one but, our weather has changed to rain for the next few days so. Her appetite has really increased, munching all the time now instead of just full meals, which is fine by me.
I had my CTScan done today and follow-up appointment with Dr. Kim, my radiologist this afternoon. All is not well as I had hoped. The CTScan showed three sites of possible cancer - 1: The original tumor in the mediastinal area MAY still be there or it may be scar tissue. No way of knowing just yet, close watching over the next months for any new growth will determine what it is. 2: A vertebrae near my heart has black spotting on it which was not there in on the March scan. 3: A vertebrae near my kidney has an extension/growth to it’s left side which was not on the March scan. I am having an MRI done of the entire spine on the 15th to see what is happening. Also, the lump on my right forearm has Dr. Kim very concerned and he has ordered a biopsy be done of it right away, they will be calling in the morning with the appointment information. SO cancer free I may not be at all.
So far so good. I went to the doctor’s yesterday and got a clean bill of health from both based on my MRI, seems I have a lot of arthritis on my spine, some osteo starting and a lot of disc trouble, but NO CANCER. The lump on my arm is going down which made both doctor’s think it is just a blown vein so, although I am keeping the appointment for the 21st with the doctor that would have done the biopsy it isn’t for that but to another bronchoscope. Dr. Gorton, my new oncologist wants to make sure that the mediastinal area in question on the CTScan is actually just scar tissue. He feels very confident that it is but he wants me to get into a clinical trial for people with Small Cell that are in remission and we would have to prove I don’t have ANY cancer left, thus the bronchoscope. I am sure not looking forward to that, the first one hurt so bad and was so scary, I am going try to see if they will but me out for it this time. Dr. Kim, my radiologist started my cranial radiation yesterday, I have it for ten days excluding the weekend. It causes very bad headaches and nausea and may cause short term memory trouble, Oh Well, been dealing with that for years now. LOL. Speaking of which…..
Mom is doing very good. Her arm is on the mend nicely, not hurting much and being used a lot. Mom is still in a world of her own most times but still O.K. Robert took us all out to dinner tonight, to Sizzler. Mom enjoyed it a lot while we were out but forgot about it soon after getting home. She still has her fixation on her hands, thinking her veins are dirt and needs to be rubbed off or away. I have tried everything with her to no avail. She was diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder years ago and put on Prozac for it, perhaps it has reared it’s ugly head again.
My mom is doing well. She is the her same old self, the one that has been here for the past four years at least, lol. Last night she beat Crystal playing Rummy, four games in a row. She is still worried about me and now thinks I am grandma, her mom, because she heard that all people as old as grandma loose their hair, other times she knows I am Denise and just wants me to look normal again. I finally got my medical insurance in the mail, MEDICAID. Since February I have been waiting, can you imagine how happy the hospital was not to mention the doctors, labs, radiologists etc. were to get their hands on a copy of that little piece of paper, it was so funny. Now too my prescriptions will be paid for, thank God. I have until Wednesday to go with my cranial radiation then another bronchoscope on the 8th and I think I am done, God willing. I will sure be glad when I feel more like myself. This radiation is doing strange things to me, both physically and mentally. I can feel my head heat up all day and night after radiation, it feels like I am flushing or something and then leaves me tingling and weak, sometimes I feel just horrible and unable to sleep for more than 45 minutes to an hour stretch. Weird this radiation is.
Today was my last day of radiation, I talked with the doctor and got some new information as well as clarification of things. My remission begins with the first day of diagnosis which was March 5th, 1999. They all feel I am within the 14-18th month criteria and are very hopeful that I will remain in remission past the 18th mark as this point is critical in getting to the five year survivor rate. All of this is still suppositions, it is depending on the outcome of the bronchoscopey. I will remain hopeful throughout but will not dwell on it any longer. I must get my life, my mom’s life back into order. This cancer has done more to us than I would have imagined.
Mom was sitting up in her chair this morning when I got up, third time this week, she wants to be up waiting for to me get here and keep the ‘Black Coat’ from getting me. She is convinced I am still very sick and won’t be with her much longer, perhaps once my hair comes back in things will change for her. Otherwise she is doing pretty well, looking forward to going to California this summer, I haven’t had the heart to tell her we can’t go.
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