MY LIFE
Danny's Letters to God
Step Nine
Dear God,
As you can see, it is pretty late and although my thoughts were with You since early this morning, it is not the same as sitting here keyboard resting on my belly.
The woman You sent to run my life had the phone tied up with work stuff. Some nerve! And I had to listen to all the work talk. This, of course, brought back some memories. Ugh!!! So my eyes are watery, my nose is runny, my throat is scratchy and I feel like some one is sitting on my chest. The woman popped a thermometer in my kisser and says the instrument read 101.2. Big deal. The numbers were written so small I'd need a glass to read them. I do feel hot though.
Out of the 36 people in attendance at the face-to-face meeting last night, a goodly number were men. Nice to see that. Friend and traveling companion, Bobby J., was the guest speaker and I enjoyed annoying him for the fifteen minutes he rambled. I do believe Your presence was firmly felt as the sharing all lead to the truth that without reaching a spiritual fitness and then maintaining that fitness we are doomed to failure. It is my belief that eating compulsively is impossible unless spiritual fitness is attained through living the steps and maintained through living the steps.
I have had many many slips and slides over 25 years but never when my surrender to Your will was complete and in effect. It is only when my stinking thinking has started that food becomes my master again. Before taking any action I need to ask myself three things. 1. What are my motives ... the real motives? 2. How important is it? 3. Most important, will it offend my God? If so, it is a no go. Simple if I remember to remember. For every wrong move I make there is a pound or two hanging on my body. Now that is food for thought.
There were some shares last night that left no doubt the person sharing, although in the rooms for years, had not gotten anywhere near the 9th step and are wondering why they can't begin to have the promises come true. Kind of like the kid who wants to score 100 on his test but will not study for it then when he flunks he blames God. We really are childlike. As I sit here in relative comfort, decisions are being made for me by You ... just let me know what they are. One is that there will be no nursing home visits on Wednesday as this cold need not be spread.
The rest of this day will be spent resting (I do that so well) and playing with my toys. A few program calls might elicit some chicken soup if the right number is dialed. Meanwhile, You are in charge. Just let me know what to do.
And God ... please watch over my family, friends, fellow loopies, those who have not completed their 9th step and the folks I don't like.