July 31, 2003

Boy, I’m so glad that this month is coming to an end. It’s about time! Too much stuff happened this month with the Jeep and all. Let’s just say, it’s been a major roller coaster. Well, I could lie about the weight but I’m not going to. I admit to gaining 7.25 in the past three weeks. Yup, I’m totally accountable to the 7.25 weight gain. I’m back on plan this week. It’s not that I wasn’t on plan the past few weeks but I was just so side tracked where I wasn’t cooking for myself at home and work so I need to make sure that I do that. Things will settle down but I’m glad I caught myself because it is so easy to over eat. Though, I do wonder if some of the weight is coming from the birth control but I can’t use that as an excuse. I just hope to see a loss on Saturday….we’ll see soon enough.

As for the Jeep, they ended up totaling it. They paid it off and I have a $317 check for the personal contents under the auto. I settled my renter’s claim for the rest of the personal items and let’s just say I’m able to totally pay off the blazer and the rest I will pay down my financial aid. When I sell the blazer, I will be able to put that towards my financial aid and I will be able to pay the rest off in 8 months, as opposed to three years!!! In the long run, it worked out because I’m able to pay off one of my three debts. Yes, I only have three debts, Jeep, Financial Aid, and Blazer. It makes me sick to think that some punk ass has some of my possessions but what can you do? At least I enjoyed my stuff while I had it. I bought the new Jeep yesterday. It’s exactly like my old Jeep but it has cloth seats instead of vinyl and no cruise control (which I’m totally bummed about). Let’s just say the Jeep will not be making any trips to Detroit any time soon. At this time, I really hate Detroit.

Pilot Chris and I are doing great. I’m enjoying my time with him. It’s nice to date a guy where you don’t have to walk on egg shells with. Shawn and Creepy Chris always had me on eggshells because I felt I couldn’t be the real Kellie with. I’m happy with this guy. I enjoy who he is. Funny thing is that I was totally not attracted to him physically at first. Maybe it was because that I was still shell shocked from Creepy Chris but as I got to know him, I began to become more and more attracted to him. Speaking of Creepy Chris, guess who I saw last Saturday? Yup CC! Pilot Chris and I were on the highway and I looked over and there was CC. I held up my hand and mouthed “Loser” and he looked away. It made me feel good, he saw me….ha! that is the best revenge! I met his parents this past weekend and they seemed very nice. His mom is a fellow weight watcher so maybe she will aid in getting me back on track. She’s coming with me to my meeting on Saturday because his parents are coming up because they are giving Chris a full sized mattress. So we’re going to have breakfast with them and then go to the meeting and then we are off to Kalamazoo for the weekend. His friend Ron and Jody are having a party on Saturday and then on Sunday we are going to his folks for dinner. I just wish I had more friends up here to introduce Chris to. I feel kind of bad about that but he’ll meet Teresa soon and my sister. Everyone likes Chris, he’s just one of those down to earth guys. I’m happy with the relationship plus it’s nice to have a guy who is independent. I’m still volunteering at the zoo. It’s so cool, it’s definitely a great volunteer gig.

Work has me running. Last week a guy up and quite the agency. Asshole, I didn’t like him anyways. He was one of those creepy old dudes. So we are absorbing his case load. Then I have a case that is under the Department of Community Health’s watch so it’s a major pain. It’s a high profile case in the state and my little agency is paying $85000 a year for this little girl to get the services she needs. It’s sad to see how much resources is going into this girl when the outlook of the case is bleak. Hopefully things will get better but I’m honestly not too optimistic about the situation.

What’s with the talk of Weight Watchers changing the plan? Is anyone else freaking out about this? I know that they have been doing this for years but I’m wondering how the program is going to change and why are they doing it in August? If anyone has any speculation on how it’s going to change, please feel free to let me know.

Sorry about my non-updating of the page. I just had a rough week. On Monday, I finally broke down in tears about the Jeep on the phone with the adjuster. It was the first time that I cried because they were screwing me out of $175 (I know it’s only $175 but it’s principal). Then I sobbed to my parents…I was just so stressed. It’s nice to know that this chapter of my life is closed and now it’s on to Jeep 2! Well take care all and thanks for your continued support-Kellie

July 20, 2003

ARG! My scale is reflecting a 5 pound gain. I’m wondering what is going on! Though, amongst all the mild stress lately, I decided last Sunday to go on the pill. I’ve only been on the pill once in my life and that’s when I was 19 and I don’t recall it being a positive experience. I figured it would be a wise choice for down the road so that I’m protected because the threat of pregnancy always bothered me. So I have no idea why the weight is still on me. I’ve been eating well and keeping to plan. Maybe it’s not a falsehood that bc effects one’s weight, maybe it is true but it is surely driving me nuts because my scale now reflects a solid 155 ARGH! I wasn’t able to attend the weight watchers meeting on Saturday because they would not let me weigh in because I hadn’t received my replacement book/pass from them. So needless to say, I’m looking forward to attending the meeting on Saturday.

Friday night I had a painful experience. I’m thinking maybe I might be having kidney stones? I had this intense pain for five hours in my back near my kidneys starting at 11:00 until 4:00 am. Around 2 am, it got so bad that it woke me from a deep sleep and my heart was racing. It was so intense that I jumped in the car and headed to the ER. Chris met me half way and drove the rest of the way. We sat there until 4:30 when I decided that the pain subsided and I’ll just link with my primary care physician because the pain went away. That reminds me that I have to set up an appointment to have that checked. Humm, when is my life going to be quiet again? Please let me know because this year really kind of bites.

They found my Jeep today. I have no idea at this time what kind of condition it is in but I talked to a guy at the place it was found and he said basically the whole inside is gutted. He said he didn’t check under the hood, the windows are smashed, etc. The police have not picked it up yet to impound it so what ever is still left on the Jeep will be probably gone tonight. I guess it was found in Detroit around the Grand River and Livernois area, and can we say, the middle of hell of Detroit? Argh! Why did it have to be found? Bastards…now if there isn’t enough damage, they are going to fix it and how do I psychologically get over this? My space has been violated. It would have been much easier to just get a new Jeep. I asked the guy if any luggage was in the Jeep and apparently not. I guess I couldn’t have been that lucky. The insurance company is asking me for receipts but guess what? I never keep any receipts so I have no idea on what they are going to do about things. What can I do? Nothing…absolutely nothing.

Pilot Chris and I are doing lovely. Taking it slow and developing the relationship. I chose to go on the pill on Sunday just in case if things head that way, I will be prepared. I’m all for protected sex but I want to be safe because I always felt kind of scared with just condoms in the past. Who knows if this will be necessary but I’m looking forward to less painful periods because mine are rather painful so that added benefit would be nice. Pilot Chris has been a great deal of help during this time because he brought me back from Detroit that Friday because I was unable to rent a car due to having a lack of credit cards (yes, I lack to own a credit card because when I paid it off a year ago, I vowed never to have one again) so I hailed a cab from Metro to Willow Run Airport and he brought me home. I’m enjoying who he is as a person. He has a lot of drive and I like that. He is definitely not like any other guy I have dated (and thank god for that!). I’m extremely attracted to him now…funny how that goes, huh? I think when I first met him, I was still in a fog from Creepy Chris. I’m just happy to be where I am at right now. Last night he fixed me a romantic dinner, stuffed shells with asparagus…can we say, romantic? We’re going camping on the South Manitou Island in mid-August so I’m looking forward to that. This guy is totally cool. I’m enjoying myself and I’m just taking it one day at a time. Well, that’s it for me today, take care all –Kellie

July 15, 2003

Humm, I think my life has been nothing but a soap opera since my last entry. First things first, I haven’t been to weight watchers in two weeks and I know I gained. My scale says I’m at 154 so I’ve been making some poor choices in the past two weeks. The conference didn’t help with eating choices and going to Chicago on Saturday and eating at Ed Debevricks and the Cheesecake Factory made matters worse. But I’m back on plan and planning to go in on Saturday.

So what is the drama? Well, my shinny new 2003 Jeep with all of my luggage was stolen from the Crowne Plaza Hotel by the Metro Airport in Detroit. I had to check out at 10:00 so I put all my luggage in the jeep. I locked it up and when I came out at 3:30 pm, it was gone. When I walked out of the hotel I noticed that it was gone right away. I walked over to the spot and saw glass on the ground. I didn’t freak out but I got that feeling of “Oh, F**k”. So I called the police, called the insurance company, called my folks and then Chris. I tried to rent a car from Avis, Enterprise, Budget, but since I don’t believe in credit cards and only had a MasterCard debit, they would not rent a car to me. So I called Chris and since he flies into Willow Run Airport, I was able to hook up with him and he flew me home. It’s going to take 21 days for the insurance company to settle up with me. If they find the Jeep, they will repair it. If it’s gone, we’ll go from there. I hope the Jeep does not find it’s way back to me because I just don’t want it. I would have thought it would have been found by now but so far, nothing and to tell you the truth, I hope it doesn’t make it’s way back to me because if it went joy riding, they probably messed it up. The thing I’m utterly disgusted with is that my personal belongings are gone. I calculated up the replacement costs of everything I had in the jeep and we are talking like $5000 worth of stuff because I was gone for a week and I packed heavy due to it being a conference. We’ll see if I get any of that back. I lost a ton of my favorite clothes and outfits. I lost my PDA, my orthodics for my flat feet,all my weight watchers materials and records of loss, MP3 player, jewelry, makeup, suitcase, roller blades, etc. All gone. I didn’t even cry about it though. I handled it quite well. I figure that everything happens for a reason and it’s only a material possession. I was not harmed, I’m safe so that’s all that matters. But of course, that is my philosophy before the insurance dealings. I hope it goes smoothly with State Farm, we’ll know in 21 days.

I’m having a blast with Pilot Chris. Okay, he’s my “exclusive” boyfriend now. Yup, I really like him. The cool thing is that I’m going to continue my activities and hanging out with friends because I see nothing changing in my life except a new addition. I really enjoy spending time with him. On the 5th, we went canoeing and met his best friend. Then we spent every evening together last week when I was at the conference because he flies out to Detroit for work so that was nice. Then we went to Chicago on Saturday and Sunday we just chilled out and watched movies. So he’s my main squeeze now. The funny thing is that initially, I was not attracted to him but after spending time with him and being with him, I’m totally attracted to who he is. It’s a lot more balanced than my last relationship, which is good. We’ll see how this goes and I’m taking one day at a time. Well, I have a ton of more stuff to write but I have to get going because I’m going up to the cabin tonight. I’ll write more tomorrow. Take care all-Kellie

July 2, 2003

Does anyone else not feel like it’s the fourth of July this week? I’m one of those people. Here in Michigan, it took forever for summer to get here because we didn’t have much of a spring and now it’s summer but yet it doesn’t feel like the fourth is upon on. Well, I’m not doing anything exciting on the first except for oncall and going up to the folks cabin. Then on Saturday, I’m going out with Pilot Chris on a surprise date. They are sending me to this training so that I can become a trauma specialist for children. It’s a weeklong conference and they are placing me in the Crowne Plaza hotel at $135 a night…nice huh? So I’m going to try to update the page on Sunday but if you don’t hear from me, I’m in Detroit.

As for weight, I’m down to 156.75. I lost .75 pounds last week thus making me down 69.75 pounds down. I have to admit that for the last four weeks, I have not been journaling my points. I have been tracking them but as for journaling I have not done this. Which isn’t exactly wise and I wouldn’t recommend doing this. I need to get back to tracking so I can get that pound loss each week. It’s not that I feel like I’m eating out of control but tracking every item you stick in your mouth is important. I need to buckle down and do this so I can lose the next 16 pounds. I’m still working out at Curves 3 – 4 times a week. I couldn’t be happier with their facilities and I’m definitely seeing the results. The other concern is that I’m still eating too much convenience food. I’m still struggling with quick and easy meals so I have to address this issue because I should be eating more basic foods like chicken, fish, etc instead of pre-made tacos and the wonderful Lloyd’s Pulled Barbecue Chicken (it’s so tasty!) and only 2 points per serving but it’s not like a solid chicken or fish. It’s like when I come home, I just don’t feel like taking a lot of time to cook. I’m hungry and I want something fast.

The plane ride was awesome. Went to South Bend, IN then over to Willow Run (an airport outside of Detroit), and then back to Greenville where we started from. Then on Tuesday, we had a picnic lunch. He made sandwiches, brought some strawberries, and drank some mango juice…very romantic. Then he gave me the most beautiful iris’s. Saturday, he’s planning on taking me on a mystery date so he’s pretty adventuresome.

As for activities for me, I’m still volunteering at the Zoo and it kicks butt! I absolutely love the zoo and doing activities there. I’m getting out and meeting a whole bunch of different people and all I can say is that it’s very rewarding. Overall, I’m feeling like my world is becoming balanced again with the introduction of this experience. It’s been what I’ve been missing. The church thing is doing good. I went to church with Mike last week at a Wesleyan Church, that was quite interesting. So I’m getting some balance. I’m volunteering, I’m hanging out with my friends, and I’m trying new things….what’s next? I have no idea, but we’ll see! Take care all-Kellie

My Vistors Since June 3, 2003