September 23, 2002

I’m down another pound since last week! So I’m down to 186.5, only 3.5 pounds from my 2nd 10% goal. Things have been going really well this week so no complaints in the healthy lifestyle world. I found couple of cool food things this week. I found some delicious egg rolls at Sams Club that have 130 calories, 3 g. of fats, and 4 g. of fiber. Then I found some decaf vanilla chai for 2 points. Then I made some peach cobbler low fat for 3 points a serving (which I got all of the ingredients at Aldis so the net cost of making the item was $1.50, can’t bet that!).

Nothing too much has been going on in my life. I’m just working. I had this bright idea to go see Dave Ramsey for a live event last week but that was a big mistake. For those of you who don’t know who Dave is, he is a financial guy who is on the radio who comes from Christian Perspective. He’s great on the radio but the live event was just boring and obnoxious. I was cattled into a gigantic church with 5,000 other people and he basically did his radio thing. If I had never heard his show, I would have found it entertaining but he basically did the same jokes. By the time the second hour hit, I wanted to leave but I vowed to stick with it. Then 45 minutes later after his spiel to the audience to buy his financial thing for $139 so I just left. I just didn’t want to be a part of it anymore. I will take his advice on the radio…I won’t be buying any expensive kit.

I’m on vacation starting on Thursday. I’m going down to my folks. I’m taking a whole bunch of my stuff that didn’t sell on ebay and selling it at the local flea market. I figure that there’s going to be a huge draw because the town is actually having the worlds chicken festival. I figure that $3 an item will help me break even. On my way down there, I’m going to pick up the new Weezer EP from a music shop named Ear-x-tacy (is that a cool name or what?) then I’m going to stop in the WW center to pick up one of those WW bracelets. We’ll folks wish me a safe journey! Take care all-Kellie

September 10, 2002

This is like the old days…two days in a row. This hasn’t happened since 2000 probably. I’ve been going over the journal the last couple of days and you know what? I like the older journal entries better. It seems like they had more substance to them. It appears that I had more stuff going on in my life back then. Now, all I do is work, work out, come home, and play on the net. There are aspects of my life I enjoy now but I’m really missing my old life before work and this playing house type thing. This has been a really strange year and it just seems like everything is going by so fast. Way too much stuff has happened this year, enough to make one’s head spin.

Sometimes I think I’m my own worst critic. I keep myself down in the hole not wanting to challenge myself. But I want to change; I want to change things. I’m going to use one of those old narrative therapy techniques, if I had a mirror that showed the future, what would it look like. I would be living in Louisville, in a nice little apartment in the Highlands. I would be just finishing up my second week of my 1st year of Ph.D. studies. I would be running around town looking for some work as a therapist. Since I was prepared for this move, I won’t feel stress in my life. I would be hanging out with Teresa and meeting new friends. So how am I going to get there? Well I’m going to study hard, pass that GRE, pull together some materials to write a personal goal paper so I can get in, and figure out what I want my dissertation to focus on. Though before that I’m going to have to get this personal life of mine straightened out.

I think the biggest thing I miss is people. I feel totally isolated here. My life revolves around work and well losing weight. I have minimal friends in my life and I can’t really express myself to Shawn. The only place I have to talk quite frankly is here in this forum and with my family. I went out with a work friend on Sunday and folks it was so nice to just get away and shoot the shit. I lack that in my life right now. I’m just simply LONELY. I’ve always been one of those people who have a few close friends but honestly, I’m dying to be around people and get out more. Instead, my life consists of the usual on Friday nights, dinner at home with the TV. So if you have any suggestions of how I could spruce up my life a bit and try new things (on the weekends that is) please feel free to leave me a suggestion in the guest book.

On a much happier note, check out the outfit. I loved this sweater when I was 18. The pants are a ebay find from two years ago and the fake brown docs are new from Goodwill. Now that’s a cheap outfit. I still like the style and I just can’t wait ‘til I wear it again. Damn, I’m looking good. My hard work is showing after 8 months of being on program. Well take care all-Kellie

September 9, 2002

Happy Birthday to me! I turned a whopping 2-7 today. Yup, I’m officially 27 now. Technically, I’m in my late twenties now…yikes, I’m getting old! I had a great birthday today. My sister called me at 7:00 am to wish me well, then at work they decorated my office and got me flowers, and Shawn bought me 2 Moby CD’s, and a sapphire necklace. Then my folks called me tonight so that was really nice. Not a bad, er?

You folks would be so proud of me today concerning healthy eating. My coworkers got me a donut instead of a cake so I ate half of it. Then tonight at dinner, Shawn took me out to Bennigans and I order the chicken health club platter. I ended up eating half of it and for desert, they brought me out one of those wonderful brownie bottom sundaes and I ate half of it also. In the old days, I would think nothing of eating the whole darn meal plus the desert. But today, I am a new woman. I now think healthy and eat healthy. I can say no to foods that are not worth the points. My result is losing 37.75 pounds thus far in the past 37 weeks. My time is now for this program, for this healthy thinking. I’m not too sure what brought me to this point but this time, weight watchers is really working. I lost 1.75 pounds this week. Overall, I think the meetings and Curves are helping me the most. I think they provide me with that social support. I may not speak up at the meetings too often or talk to the person next to me at Curves but I know that these places are my support sources. Today I got measured at Curves and I’ve lost a whopping 8 inches since mid June. I got on their scale today and I noticed that scale said 186! Folks, I haven’t been 186 since my junior year and college…and it feels great. I only have 47.25 pounds left to goal…which is completely reachable within the next year. Next year, I’m going to be at goal…now that is something to think about.

I’m totally addicted to reality TV. I’m watching sorority life right now. Now wasn’t that a big surprise that Jordan didn’t follow through joining the group. Though, being on that side of the fence, its possible to see her point of view. I was a Phi Mu at CMU. I actually went through pledge period and was initiated into the group but my gut said, don’t do it. You see, I had this “Big Sister” who lost 4 little sisters (pledges) and there was pressure for me to get in because she was graduating. I went through with it but I really shouldn’t have because my so-called sisters were just jerks to me. So I thought I had the last laugh, I de-activated and ruined the family tree. I had a couple of sisters that just tortured me. Funny thing, this one gal named Liz used to rip on me about my weight. About a month ago I saw her at weight watchers and it looked like she put on a good 70 pounds. I guess there is justice after all, huh? She saw me at the meeting and she just had that froze look on her face and then she left. I’ve seen her twice around town since then and she just avoids me. Though, I’ve always wondered if I had actually pledged the group I wanted to would things have been different? Maybe…but at least I tried new things. Well, that’s it for me tonight, take care all-Kellie

September 4, 2002

Well, I maintained this past weigh in! No problem with that whatsoever. TOM is coming up this week so I’m wondering if I’m going to gain this week. I would be water weight anyways and it would come off any ways.

Well, guess where I went this past weekend? Shawn actually took me out to a real weekend get away to Frakenmuth, Michigan. For those of you outside of Michigan, they are famous for two things: Chicken and Christmas All year round. The chicken is fabulous. It’s like a buffet style at your table and I didn’t overeat. I ate until I felt comfortable and when I was too full, I stopped eating. We then walked around the town for a little while and enjoyed the sites. Then we went to Birch Run, a huge outlet mall, and I found some real bargains at the Columbia Store. Every item I bought was $4.25…you can’t beat that. Most of the items I bought are for Ebay next year. Then we went out to Mt. Pleasant, where I got my undergraduate degree. We stayed the night and bummed around town the next day. I’ve been gone from CMU for 4 years and the campus looks beautiful. They redesigned the library totally, they are building 3 new dorms, and one new health sciences buildings. It just looked great and it made me realize how much I miss college. Strange huh? The trip was my birthday gift, a little early. I turn the big 27 next Monday but the funny thing is that I’ve been thinking this whole year that I am 27 but I’m not…I’m 26…funny that I was aging myself a year.

Well, I pulled my stuff out of the shop. It feels good to be rid of that situation. Things just got too crazy and I wasn’t making any money after having to work the place once a month. I figure that when I go down south on vacation, I’ll just take my stock down there to the flea market. I’ll also take the items that don’t sell on ebay down there too. I’m also cleaning out my closet this week. I actually put some of my clothes on there this week (if you are looking for some 18 / 20 closes, hit the link on the main page). This is just part of my closet but I’m getting stuff out finally…and making room for new items.

On a good note, I’m getting a bonus at work. I’m going to use it as the start of an emergency fund/school fund. So things are going well this week. Not too much going on but it’s just kind of blah…is it Friday yet? Oh, how do you like my new toy? I had to spring for Beaker and Bunsen from the Muppet show. Take care all-Kellie

My Vistors Since September 4, 2002