Nature Songs ~~~~
JUNE, 2002 ~
continued
June 5, 2002 ~ Bittersweet ~~ Going for my regular doctor to check on meds and touch base as usual led me on another road. Discussing my index finger with him, he felt he needed to have the finger x-rayed and get a better picture of how it was doing. He was surprised that the PA at the orthopedic office had not ordered one with all the finger has been doing since Thanksgiving. One glance at the x-ray and he told me that I had no joint. (Tis, strange that the PA told me I only had a flare up of arthritis there such a short time ago. I have to wonder how I had arthritis in the joint when the joint is not present?) At any rate, the nurse made a call to Hickory and set up an appointment with Dr. D. and sent me along with the x-rays to see him.
Surgery is not what I would like to be going through here when the weather is so hot - or any other time, actually. There are times we have to do what we have to do regardless of how we may feel about it. Doctor D. came in and looked at the finger in question and commented the end of the finger was limber. He would have to go in and shape up the end of the two bones and fuse them together, inserting a pin to hold them until they fused securely. I asked about the pin being used and was told it is about the size of a needle and sometimes two may be used. The familiar splint will be worn again until the finger is healed. At least, this time I should be able to do things without all the swelling, redness and throbbing experienced lately.
It’s enough to have to go back to the surgeon with a small thing like a finger when you know there are others with much larger problems. This visit was a bit more touchy for me. Having been out of town two days, the doctor had more appointments to see than usual and was running late seeing all of them. At one time there were eight of us waiting at the same time. Three had already been called back since I arrived. Four of the ladies began comparing their problems and symptoms.
Seems ninety percent of the patients waiting had back problems. The four talking had all had surgery at least once and two had more than that. Three were having severe flare ups for one reason or another. I mentioned that well, I had bad problems with my back, but nothing could be done to help. They all started telling me that I should have shots (I’ve had more than I can count.) Or, why didn’t I get so-and-so done? They couldn’t fathom anyone that was not a candidate for surgery to improve a condition. I didn’t cantor with them. They talked and I listened as they droned on and on about all their problems with their backs. None of them had experienced problems for nearly forty years; nor had rehabs, therapy, pain clinics and as many series of shots as I’ve had. Would it be that I could trade places with them for only a short time. Then again, it is best I accept myself and continue to learn to adapt to whatever may arise. Life is livable and I hope to live it to the fullest I am capable of doing. But there is a bittersweetness thinking of so many that are able to have corrective surgery on their backs that is successful. Oh well, I am getting corrective surgery on my tiny finger (compared to the back) and it will add immensely to my ability to do many things. Some presents are presented in tiny packages. Fixing my finger is that small present.
June 6, 2002 ~ And The Name Is ....? ~~ Midmorning the phone rings. I answer, "Hello."
The response was sort of an expected one and yet, it was somewhat a shock as well.
Mother responds, "Guess what! I got a new roommate."
"Oh? What’s her name and when did she come?"
"I don’t know her name and ... she doesn’t know mine . they just brought some clothes in awhile ago and said I was getting a new roommate. They hung up the clothes and left. When I got back from bingo this lady was here. She’s in a wheelchair and seems nice... Nobody told us that she would be moving in here. She’s as surprised as I am."
As I listened over the phone Mother asked the new lady on the hall her name, and introduced herself as well. Then she told me the name of Roomie #4 and told Roomie who was on the other end of the phone line. Mother invited her to go to Bingo with her the next time they have a game. Hopefully this is a match-up of two that will work out as roommates. Mother has taken her under her wing and already trying to take care of her.
As I witnessed the conversation by ear, the first agenda to be taken care of was the television.
"Do you like ball games?"
"No, I don’t care for ball games." OOPS! This could present a problem. Mother must have those baseball games.
"Well, I certainly hope you don’t like to watch those soaps! I can’t stand those things."
"I like to watch my soaps. But, I don’t watch them much. I don’t really do much watching TV stuff."
Mother tacks on her final words on the subject. "Well, if you want to watch soaps you can just go and watch them somewhere else. I can’t stand those things. If you want to you can watch a ball game with me some, but no soaps in this room."
I interrupted Mother here and suggested that maybe sometime she could allow her new roomie to watch TV once and a while. She agreed to allow her to see a soap once in a while, but certainly not everyday. At this point I left them to get acquainted more.
It is after supper before I arrive to spend a little time at the nursing center. There’s a little ritual I seem to be involved in when I arrive around supper each time. One lady has a problem finding the channel on her TV to watch Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. The CNA’s are on their supper break at this time and I’ve been helping her out with finding the correct channel. She likes to watch me and when she gets my attention she will sort of nod her head as if she’s saying, "Hey, come here a minute."
Another one of the residents will find some reason to call me into her room to a little something for her. Yesterday, Mother and I had to both smile as I mention my experience with her next door resident. She was sitting in her wheelchair in the middle of her room holding her huge plastic water cup which holds about a quart of ice and water. It has to be heavy and she had no place to set it down as her hand shakes uncontrollably with Parkinson’s Disease. When I came to the rescue and placed the awkward-to-hold container on her bedside table she said, "You are such a sweet lady and I am just so lucky to have you here. I love you - I love you so much - and I just praise the Lord that you are here." She held my hand and clutched it tightly, not wanting to let it go. It was such a simple service I was able to do for her, but it is the attention that she strives to capture, just a little attention and TLC.
Mother’s new roomie had not returned from supper and she really wanted me to meet her. Mother also had not had ice for the afternoon and only the remainder of the Coke I poured for her last night was all her fluid for today. She asked several times for me to push her down the hall in search of her new roomie. That is most unusual, so naturally, I savored the moment and took her on a ride down the hall. We stopped and talked with our nurse friend to see how she is progressing from her stroke back right before Christmas. Her good news was that she is looking forward to going home the end of this month! The Good Man Up Above has been so much on her side and helped her to progress a long, long way over the past five months.
Mother’s big awkward-to-hold container filled with ice, we returned to the room and found her roomie sitting in the doorway. She must have been on the other end of the hall since she was not seen the direction we had traveled. She was getting concerned because no one had come to take her back home. She didn’t understand why she was even brought to this place to visit since nothing had been said to her about moving from one hall to another.
Roomie nor Mother neither one were notified in any way, shape, or form that a change would be taking place today for the two of them. As the move was made next to nothing was mentioned to either of them. The Roomie was brought to the door and told, "This is where you will be staying." They didn’t even tell her that her clothes were hanging in the closet for her!
Mother was told that she would be having someone to join her on that first day she came to the center. They even told her the name and where she was coming from and how they felt the two of them would get along well together. They were introduced with Roomie #1 arrived.
It was a while before Roomie #2 arrived, but Mother was told that she was coming and that she would only be there a short time for rehab from a broken hip. Still Roomie #2 came and they were introduced. They came to know each other, but it was not a good situation. The new Roomie cried all the time, hollered for the nurses all the time and would not do any of the therapy that would help her go home again. She had to be moved to a Rest Home because she refused the help and no longer qualified for insurance treatment.
After another fairly long time by herself, Mother was told that a lady from the Rest Home in front of the Nursing Home would be moving in with her and again she was told about her new Roomie and what to expect. Roomie #3 was the one that died recently at the age of 100, and Mother has been missing her. They had been together a little over two years.
Somebody was not thinking today when they brought two thinking people together sight unseen and not even heard off - just plopped them together and didn’t say a word to either one about the action taken. This is not a way to conduct business and a nursing home is big business. This is not giving any consideration whatsoever to the feelings of these people and they most certainly have feeling. I heard both of them this evening. Roomie #4 retorted, "This sure isn’t any way to treat a body. They don’t have any tact at all!"
I assured her that she would not be left along for the night. She would be sleeping in the room with Mother and that she even had a brand new bed with new mattress and springs to sleep on. I opened up her closet and found her a jacket to slip on because her arms were cold and she felt better knowing that she had "seen" her clothes there.
But alas! For months the nurses, CNAs and Housekeepers have put in requests for a light to be replaced in the recepticle at the headboard of the new bed. Only one was working. Tonight that one was not working. The only light she had to use was the light overhead. Mother hates when that light is on! It makes her one eye water and hurt, as well as gives her a headache. We keep the curtain pulled enough to shield her eye from the overhead light out in the hall when she is in bed. There is no shielding from the overhead light in the room since it is in the center of the ceiling.
In all the other experiences I’ve had with Mother and my Aunt (AO) in other establishments, no one has ever treated the residents as Mother and Roomie #4 were treated today. It is just not done in a polite society. These are people that are already forgotten by the masses and have given up so much of their identity and lifestyles to have to live in a nursing center. A move is one situation where both parties can still feel they are taking part in the process and feel worthy of consideration. These two were denied that due process today. If they were unconscious, unresponsive and unable to comprehend the move that would be a whole different administration tactic. Somebody goofed - short and simple ....
Ending the day with happy thoughts ... Tomorrow is the big day. Tbird and DynoKid will be leaving on the big trip. DynoKid is finally showing his excitement about traveling to Australia. He will be doing a lot of "My name is ..." during the ensuing seventeen days of travel. My prayers are with them for a safe and happy experience. May the Good Lord take care of all the group and bring them back home safely. I’m thinking of maybe having Tbird buy some Christmas presents for me to give this year while she is in the Land Downunder. It would be another unexpected idea for gifts ... Maybe she would have time to do some shopping. I wouldn’t mind if they were all alike - maybe some of the shorter didgeridoos for them.
June 8, 2002 ~ Challenge Time ~~ All the game plans one would prudently make does not insure that the ensuing events will transpire as programmed. Tbird thought she had all the wrinkles worked out for the care of Little Miss Giggles during the three weeks she and DynoKid are in Australia. Not so! Even before the plane was boarded in Charlotte, Giggles was exerting her own powers of persuasion to carry out her idea of how that three weeks should be handled.
Since Tbird is the head honcho for the group of People-to-People kids making the trip from this area, she had to be at the airport terminal ahead of the two o’clock time set by the airline. She has to keep up with all the paperwork, passports, and welfare of fifty kids; not to mention the boarding passes each time planes are changed. Because she would be busy and the actual departure time would not be until 5 pm, hubby and NascarKid didn’t stay around to watch them off. They hadn’t been in the air very long when they came to the house to pickup Giggles and take her home.
Ah! Not so! Miss Giggles exhibited all her skills acquired during her three years of watching and learning and announced to one and all, “I want to stay with Momma Jeanne. I don’t want to go home.” Her refusal to go was most verbal and demonstrative. Dad had to feel bad knowing that his favorite Little Princess didn’t want to go home with him and NascarKid. An attempt was made to put her in the truck for the trip home, but suddenly there had to be a pit stop by the little one. That put her back in the house - and the turf where she intended to remain. After a while, Dad made the decision that if it was okay with me, she could stay the night with me. Having no other plans, I agreed that she could remain.
We already had made plans for Giggles to be here with me Saturday night, because Dad has to have NascarKid at the church at five am for the trip to Florida for the week with the youth groups from several different churches. Last year fifteen vans were rented to carry all the kids that attended. A large group is on the roster for this summer’s trip as well.
Sunday night is another time that she will be here as planned. Dad has to fly to Macon, Georgia, for the funeral of a close friend from his hitch in the Air Force MedVac Reserves Unit. He flies out of Charlotte at 8 am Monday morning. This funeral is for the reservist that was returning home from active duty and on his layover in Germany he and a fellow member, a nurse, were working out. A man in excellent health, who had never had any problems with his heart, had a sudden heart attack and died instantly there in the gym at the age of fifty.
A call this evening to tell Giggles goodnight and check on how the day had been for the two of us, and Giggles announces, “I don’t want to go home.” She was happy to talk to her Daddy, but doesn’t want to go home... We made plans that I will take her to daycare Monday morning. If Dad gets back from Georgia in time, we feel that it will be easier to pick her up at the center and take her home than trying to take her from here again. I’ve already told her that Daddy is coming over to see her tomorrow, but she will still stay here with me; no going home. Hopefully, she will not see the time as one she has to stand guard and battle for her own rights to remain with Momma Jeanne.
This retiree from school is not the active, alert teacher of the very young that she once was and a full day all alone with a wee one has it’s off times for keeping up. We did quite well in a way. Of course there was the time a redheaded young one was not agreeable for getting her hair combed. Sorry, but if we can’t do it with me using two hands to make it easier for combing out the tangles, then one hand has to do as the other one holds Giggles in one place to get it combed. She was not going out without her hair straightened up from a night’s tousled head.
There were some other times that we didn’t see exactly eye-to-eye on events, but we worked out our differences. I had promised her some KFC popcorn chicken for lunch and on our way to pick it up, Giggles went to sleep. Our next objective was to visit with Mother since I didn’t make a trip to see her yesterday. Wanting her to get more sleep, I stopped and filled up the car with gas while she slept. There is a drive through window to make payments and I didn’t have to leave her alone. At the nursing center, I loaded up our food and Mother’s ham biscuit, locked the car and left her to sleep while I carried in everything to Mother’s room which is not too far down the hall from where I parked. No, I didn’t park in a parking space. I seldom do. I generally park at the porch and near the doorway to avoid having to walk as far. Once all the stuff was indoors, I came back out to the car and woke Giggles. Her first words were, “Where is my popcorn chicken? I’m hungry.”
Charlie is the center of all the attention for Giggles. She loves that dog and has him following her around from spot to spot. As most dogs do with children, he seems to sense that she doesn’t intend to hurt him and is most gentle in spite of what she does to him. On the good side she loves covering him up with her blanket and he loves to be covered. He would not wear her red sunglasses on his face, but he did leave them along when she placed them on his back. There he went walking along after her with the red glasses worn across his back and he did not bother to try to get them off. Charlie is going to be very lonesome when Little Miss Giggles has gone away.
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Lenoir,NC 28645
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©2002 by Stormy Jeanne
