AUGUST,1999

August 22,1999 - Some days are good days. Some days are bad days. Some days are just so-so and la-la-land days. This one just happens to fall into the last category. La-tee-da—la-la-la and so the day passes. Oh, I do watch the church service on television and get a real boost from the sermon. I wonder what that church would be like to be there in the flesh and talk with those others in attendance. I hope that Mother has the right station and is watching. It turned out that her remote was not broken as we suspected it may be. She had spilled her coke on it and it was wet inside. Once it was scrubbed, uncontaminated, dried thoroughly and pieced back together it worked. Thereupon she tried to get the wrong channel - 56 instead of 16 - when she first tried it out!

There seemed to be little incentive for me to exert the strength to dress and so forth, so I lolled around, did some computer things, reposed, and took it easy until the third or fourth time the call came from the nursing center. By that time it is near 7 p.m.; B.J. is there with his wife and they have the proofs with them from the wedding. I finally get dressed and motor over there. Come to find out that big brother had also got up from his bed, in order to come see Mother. A fine pair we two make!!

I retreat to my abode and once again settle down before the 'puter. I think I have looked up all the family relations on the Social Security Death Index List only to think of yet another one to check on. It is a good way to get the dates on when born and died. While I'm at it I also am getting the Social Security numbers in case they may be needed somewhere down the road. I have yet to look at my Sunday papers. Mrs. Jay brought them out to me before daybreak this morning. She mentioned about how all our outdoor lights lit up the outdoors making it ease for her to get her walking in early this morning.

August 23,1999 - Quilter's day again. Seems the months are flying by more like a hurricane blowing through. How can days flee so quickly? I do not even have my charm squares cut again. I washed the material to cut into six inch squares. I was somewhat puzzled because it was only a half yard piece. I know I told the lady to cut my pieces one yard lengths. I barely get my fourteen pieces out of it once it is evened up. Thirty minutes before time to leave, it dawns on me! That is the material Ms. Jay is taking! I got a half yard of it to use for appliqué' work later on. I rush and get the other piece of material which is not washed and quickly cut my fourteen squares to take with me. Thank goodness I remembered in time to correct myself. I stand to be monitored in all that I do.

Today is our Challenge Catered Luncheon at the Community House. Everyone is excited about getting to see what the others have designed. This year is the nine patch. What a great assortment of ideas and creativity are shared. Nine patch has been carried to a new dimension in some of the projects. I particularly like one traditional nine patch that has a beautiful array of soft pastel colors. It was a full size quilt and each patch was a different color. Another one that took my fancy was made up of various sizes and colors that formed the patches. This one was full of brilliant colors. Then there were all the others that were equally excellent. Sure glad that I am not the judge. The rest of the exhibit at the museum this year will be past projects that have won awards.

Lunch was delicious; croissant sandwiches, asparagus, salad, mixed fruits and lemon cake. By the time it was all over, I was more than ready to leave. My feet and legs were beginning to cramp and spasm on me. When I got to the car off came my shoes and I drove back to Lenoir barefoot. Bed never looked so good when I got home. Some day, some how this low energy, exhaustion, hurting of myself must improve. There is a silver lining and I am searching until I uncover it.

August 24,1999 - A late night phone call and a promise to keep Giggles for a few hours and I am up early to unlock the front door and be ready when she arrives. Another call this morning and I hear that she woke this morning fussy and running a fever. Meds in tow she arrives only to go back to sleep - and she slept and slept and slept the morning away. Once awake to take a bottle, I put her down to change her and put on her clothes since she arrived still in her sleeper. What does she do? She grabs the edge of the blanket, rolls over and wants to go back to sleep. I get her diaper changed, but never bother with putting on a romper outfit. Dad comes about lunch time to take her home so the two of them can snooze the afternoon away. He still has to take it easy on his foot that had the surgery last week.

I work on the Family Tree mergers some more before heading to the bank, the grocery store and the nursing center. Three thirty! And I remember that Lady comes about five! I make my rounds and get Mother's candy supply to her for her treats to the workers there. The nurse comes in and closes the door - oh-oh! Something is in the air. Come to find out that Mother got ruffled with them because they had to wash her chair and pad and took her shoes off that she had one. Seems that her bladder control has been much worse the past two weeks. The only way Mother wants to solve the problem is to come home and take care of herself. (There is carpet in her room.) She needs no help and does not want to try different approaches to help solve the problem. Finally, she does agree to allowing the CNA's to take her to the bathroom every two hours and see if that helps. I know that she is upset and depressed, but nothing I say or do helps to relieve her outlook on life at this moment. I have no choice but to leave her and hurry home so Lady can get in to spin her magic on my humble abode.

I end up spending more time working on the genealogy, trying to check and double check what is already recorded. There are those that are repeats simply because of a one letter difference in a spelling of a name or word. If in doubt I am deleting! It will be much easier for me to go back through my hard copies and add back instead of searching for why so-and-so will not fit in where he/she should. I jot down when I delete, so I can check out later for what is correct.

I got new pictures put on Giggles' page along with her brothers. I work on a page for Buddy Boy, but as I write there are deep dark troubles of the past experiences with Social Services that pop into the background making it hard to express his particular situation without wondering about past outcomes. These are outcomes that have troubled me ever since they occurred.

One went all the way back to when I was in High School. A single mother died, leaving a minor daughter. None of the family would take her. She had lots of uncles and aunts, but DSS had to step in and take over. They finally convinced my aunt to take her and work with her. She lived with her for part her high School years before moving in with yet another foster home. I still keep in touch with her.

In another county, there was the DSS again and a early teenage boy. There was only one way of describing him - "just plain mean." He had the community terrorized, actually carry a large pocket knife which he would whip out whenever he lost his temper which was often. The community had to endure his threats and rages until there was an opening in Jackson Training School - a place for troubled and dangerous teens. Until that time he roamed the countryside and attended school only when he wished and demolished a lot of school equipment when he did attend.

The most troubling occurrences for me were the ones taking place through the school. The girls who were being molested by the mother's live-in boyfriend. DSS spoke to her, trying to get her to leave him or take action against him. Instead, over the weekend the family disappeared. Several months later they showed up in another state, still together. The mother was afraid she could not live without him.

The four year old that was raped so brutally by her stepfather, she spent a long time in the hospital following surgery for repairs. Her foster parents wanted so badly to adopt her and make her a part of their family. Instead, when the stepfather showed up in town again, the girl was taken out of town to another foster home. Because of her age her testimony would not hold up in court. Her mother being mentally slow could not testify to what she knew. It would have been a "waste of taxpayers money" to press charges. The mother had been declared incompetent to raise four other children by another husband. These children would have to be declared once again in court to have an incompetent mother before they could be placed elsewhere. Why? Because they had a different father and was considered a different family - it didn't matter that the mother's competence was unchanged.

Yet another time, a small child was so badly beaten by a common-law husband - not her father- she was out of school for two weeks. Her eyes were still black when she returned to class. DSS left her in the situation because they wanted to try to get the mother to care for her by leaving her with them. They up and moved to another district as well. . . I worry about our own little one and what will be best for him. He is in a very precarious position. As with Humpty-Dumpty once he falls, all the kings horses and all the kings men can never repair the damage. He is so very happy now.

August 25,1999 - I don't feel so great this day. My tummy has a rumbly - but not for Pooh's honey. Just hope it is not this flu thing that is making it's rounds now. I thought I would go spend some time with Mother since she is down and out, but I call her instead. They already have her up and out of bed and have brought her a new mattress for her bed. She does seem to be in a little better spirits. I called BJ to see if his daughter could call or visit her. Mother seems to respond to her better than the rest of us. Mother called to remind me that Dolly has a birthday coming up and have I mailed her a card yet? No, I have not, but I promise to get one in the mail today. She is greatly missed here and we all look forward to when she is able to return to her apartment and care for herself. Her elbow is healing nicely. Her side and leg do bother her however. If she gets back to our territory and visits with Mother it will help both of them. Some times they are more like twins than just sisters.

Rain has come, prain has come. The fingers are working under rebellion. There is some swelling in some of the fingers. As long as it does not storm, the SPA would feel so wonderful. The warm gentle churning of the soft water and the sounds of the birds in the background. It is a soothing experience, but I do feel a little apprehensive about going into it alone. There is always that, "What if?" in the back of my mind. (Of course, I still do not have Lifeline yet.) Guess I could take the cordless phone out with me - just in case. Yes, I will watch the weather and sky and think on it....

I had Lady to collect all my clothes and carry them into my bedroom last evening. She commented that she would never worry about me running out of clothes. Of course the summer and winter clothes are all mixed in together. I told her that once they were in my room I could handle the situation. I can sit and pair together the pants and tops that go together and the sweaters, etc. Bunches of them will go on hangers in the closet. All the empty hangers attest to how empty it is at this moment. It is a long trek from the washer/dryer at the opposite end of the house to carry them. Now that they are together where they belong I should be able to keep them better organized and under control. "Now pants! Get yourselves up and on the hanger where you belong!" "Sweaters, don't you dare hang on that chair! Go back to your drawer where you live." "Okay, little ones, you need to get back to your rightful owner - BingoKid! I'm sure he can use you better than me."

Now on to greater things.

Allan brought Buddy Boy by for a visit today. Buddy Boy had to go to the ear doctor because of all the infections he has had this year. He will be getting tubes in his ears before long and then the doctor says that we will notice a lot more talking from him. Right now he is not talking all that much. So that is next on the little fellow's agenda...

August 26,1999 - An early morning phone call this morning and Ms. Jay offers to go with me to the dentist on this day. We get over there a little early and as office appointments often go, I had to wait a while. When I went to the throne to receive my new crown I was in for an unexpected surprise. The crown did not conform to the gum as well as the dentist thought it should, so the temporary went back in place and the crown went back to the laboratory for some remodeling. Next week we shall endeavor again.

We delayed for refueling ourselves at Chubby's in the tiny town of Cajah's Mountain with a chef's salad before a visit with Mother. I ordered a small pizza to take to Mother as a special surprise. She was more than happy to get it and wasted no time digging into a cheesy slice. What she didn't eat I enjoyed for my supper.

Allan has been mentioning that my floor seemed to be getting wet and the boards swelling under the linoleum. He said something about it last week and I had him to check to see if the heat pump was draining properly. When I had it serviced the man said to inspect and if it didn't drain properly he would come back and fix it. Everything looked dry. This evening he broached the topic again with how much worse the floor was getting and went down stairs to investigate round. He was back in a few minutes. The heat pump is not draining, but the water has been running down the back of it! Now I have to call first thing in the morning and get them out here to fix it. Also wonder if I am going to have to notify my homeowners' insurance? I hate to think what the apartment, rug and all may be like after all this time. I will have to walk around the house if I go down to see about it. At this point and time, I wonder if I really care all that much. Well, of course I do. I just don't relish the thoughts of what may need done to correct any damage.

I told Tbird I would be over and get her boys after school in the afternoon since she is leaving town for the weekend and Dad has an appointment. He will come by later and pluck them up here at the house. I had hoped to spend some time with my friends at the grand opening of Kohl's in Hickory. That looks like it will be put on hold.

August 27,1999 - An early call this morning to the Electrical Company that installed and service heat pump and I am put on alert for the day. They note that I will be gone for an hour this afternoon to get the boys from school. So-o-o-o-o, it can be anytime before I hear from them. The service date was May 31. That is a long time for the water to reap its damage as it has seeped who knows where as it went downward. I had thought of having Lady to vacuum down there and straighten up, but decided to spend her time up stairs with me instead. She would have seen what was happening if I had sent her down. From this day forth we are just going to have to make regular checks around the out of way corners of this rambling maze I refer to as home. Cordless phone in hand, guess I could make a round outside the house to check downstairs. There is also the space under Mother's room where the water heater is stationed. Bunches of places that need to have an eye on them.

So early in the day and yet it will be a long day

A long day it has been, INDEED! BingoKid, NascarKid and DynoKid in a pact together . . . best of friends wanting more time together. What is a dear, sweet, doting Grandmother to do? She makes them each promise to be on good behavior, listen, and sleep somewhere else besides HER BED!! They surely have grown another foot or so ... LOL. The computer is turned off at midnight.

The repairman came and spent such a short time undoing the problem causing all the water damage. Apparently, when the unit was serviced he pushed on the drain line and it was not draining as it should. A short section was taken out of it to give it a better draining angle and the line was blown clean with an air compressor. He left the new section so it could be opened to check it at times and make sure it works properly. In five or six years, I had never had a problem until now with it.

The carpet at the bottom of the stairs had to come up and the plywood under it will have to be replaced. The carpet in the den will have to be vacuumed to get out the water. The furniture is moldy and mildewed and will have to be cleaned. A call is made to get a man to come and clean the three rooms down there. Wes buys me a dehumidifier which I needed anyway. He had one when he lived there, but took it with him to his new house. He bought it because of BusyKid's asmtha problems anyway. I have him to place the new one on the kitchen counter and let it drain down the sink. That way I will not have to be bothered with keeping water emptied and it can run on automatic all the time.

While Wes runs along to the store, I have him detour on the way back and pick up pizzas I ordered for supper. That was the unqualified choice for suppertime.

I also learned this evening that BusyKid's blood work indicated that he has had Mono. That is why his spleen has been enlarged. The swelling in it is beginning to go down now. He will be okay once it returns to normal. Good news!!

August 28,1999 - It was really a good night last night. DynoKid slept with me (my choice). The other two chose the Sunken Room. One in the recliner and one on the couch. The TV stayed on all night. At some point in the early morning hours, BingoKid had turned on a few lights through the house which I had to turn off. At some point in time the two of them wandered into Mother's room and spent the rest of the night on her bed. It's lunch time before they decide they want breakfast. BingoKid calls his Mom to see if she will take the three of them uptown to the Bluegrass Festival today. If they go, it should be a lot of fun for them with all the music that will be playing and the other fun things to do. Before they leave, I plan to have them go through the house and put things in place.

Strange how I noticed things were different here in the house and simply did not think that there was a reason. Doors that were not closing easily. I wondered by the front door was not shutting as it had been; why the bathroom door was tight; why the dogs barked every time the unit came on during the night, or growled sort of. It was something they had not done until recently. They must have heard a difference which I didn't. The change in the floor. I had even mental thought of how cool the floor felt there when I walked over it. What we do about the floor is yet to be determined.. It will be the hardest damage to repair and the most costly. We really should have looked a little more thoroughly when we first noticed the damp smell.... Even today, my sinus are better than they had been in quite a while... it all points back to the water dripping into the basement instead of running outdoors as it should.

August 29,1999 - Wes brought over a rented carpet cleaner to get out what water he could last evening. He took out some pieces of the carpet and noted that some of the baseboard will have to be replaced. It will be Wednesday late afternoon before the man will be able to come and clean the carpet and furniture. That will leave us to get the walls and rest of it ... Meanwhile there is a box fan on and the dehumidifier is working hard. Guess I'll have to call the insurance company Monday morning.

I was pleasantly surprised when Allan and his crew came by with supper for the four of us. I was wondering what I could fix that was quick and easy and hadn't decided what was here that I wanted. Cooking is not my forte of choice any more. It is too difficult to cook for one. If I cook very much, I end up throwing out part of it. This morning I make a trip by Bojangle's for Mother a country ham biscuit and me an egg, cheese and bacon and coffee for two. That's the easy way to feed oneself.

Of course, I barely turned into the parking lot at Bojangle's and cars squeezed by to park while I toughed out the line to pickup at the window. About an hour later I walk into Mother's room with meal and coffee in hand. I told her if I had not promised to bring a Bojangle's Country Ham biscuit, I would have been able to spend more time with her. She was just getting out of bed, so timing must have been pretty good. We listened to our church service on TV as we ate.

Back home and after a brief rest, Wes runs in to check on the progress downstairs and soon afterward I am back to the Family Tree Maker and my phenomenal merging exercise. It's a grand method to learn and remember the family tree.

August 30,1999 - Some days are hard to think back on and remember exactly what it is that you did for the day. No, it is not a boring type day; nor especially exciting; not even a mediocre type. Just a day that seems to have come and gone on it's own, with little input from moi. It was much cooler, thanks to Hurricane Dennis. The wind blew all day steadily and strong for us. We got only the wind, cooler air and clouds off and on, but no rain or damage. Wind gusts were up to 30 mph at times.

I had phone calls through out the day and did a little of this and a little of that. I got my FTM merge completed and working. Now there are over three thousand names in the renegade of parentage through the years and over the miles. Allan calls checking on how things are perking in the basement. I tell him all is still working hard to rid us of all the extra water. I have to call in some refills at the pharmacy and finally manage to dress after 6 p.m. to leave long enough to pick them up and get a bite to eat.It's Allan's birthday and I haven't even a card for him. I did wish him happy birthday when he called. Maybe I'll give him money to take his wife out for dinner for the two of them.

A call to Alabama and there is bad news about Aunt Dolly. She is not doing well at all and has had two trips to the Emergency Room at the hospital there. They have decided that she has a hairline fracture of her hip. As of now she is unable to get out of bed. Her daughter is having all her things moved down there from her apartment in Hickory so she will keep her in Alabama at her home and care for her. Her Parkinson's medicine has been changed and on top of everything else, her elbow is draining from the incision area where the pin was inserted. She even sent word to her son up here to sell her car. All of this has Mother upset and worried, and for some reason we can not make a long distance call from her phone to let her talk with Dolly.

August 31,1999 - After going to bed after one a.m. I woke up bright and early. I feel better than I have in a pretty long time. I'm lying quietly, watching the wind still blowing in the trees out the window; thinking how I felt sort of like a butterfly just coming out of its cocoon. It struggles as it works itself free of its security and former self. The struggling makes it stronger and is important to its survival in the world outside of its cocoon. Without the struggle it would never survive in its new world. To help it would be to bring it failure in its struggle for continued life. Along about here, my train of thought is broken by the ringing of the phone. It is not yet 7 a.m. Imagine the surprise when I answer and on the other end, I hear, "Hello, is this Stormy? Stormy Jeanne?" I answer, "Yes." "Well, hello! This is Knightgale!" "Er.....?" "You know! Knightgale - email- ICQ- from South Alabama?"

She is on her yearly tour through the back roads of America riding her motorcycle - alone. Her husband has no desire to ride a motorcycle, so each summer she takes a month off from her nursing and leaving him at home seeks the contentment of facing new adventures on the road again and renewing herself for the coming year. This time she is 40 miles on the other side of Greensboro heading my way. When she gets closer she will call again.

Right after that call I turn around and call my neighbor out to join us. Before we can talk she mentions that she sees my son-in-law driving up with Giggles. Oh my goodness! I completely forgot that I was to keep her this morning for a few hours. She is sleeping so I call next door again and make arrangements for lunch.

Of all days, I put clothes in the washer and it decides it is time to spill its water on the kitchen floor again! Thank goodness, it was only set on prewash. I get a call in to the insurance company so an adjuster can come out and give us directions on what plans to make about the water damage. The floor upstairs is getting worse... the dampness is spreading longer and wider and higher. The oak boards under the covering are looking bad. A schoolteacher friend calls to touch base. Giggles needs to be fed. Some how I get dressed and some dishes in the wash and some blueberry muffins made.

I called Alle to see if she would like to come by. She has other things to do but gets here just as the muffins are coming out of the oven. We sit and enjoy the hot muffins and Armanilla coffee and actually just enjoyed talking with each other. She had to leave before anyone else came. I forgot! The other neighbor stopped by for the first time in ages. She was later than usual leaving this morning and saw Oreo out and stopped to see if I knew he was out.... while she was here she got to see Giggles for the first time and hold her a little.

It was near lunchtime when Knightgale called. She was already in Lenoir. I drove up to Burger King to meet her and let her follow us (Ms. Jay was with me) back to my house for lunch. While she was here Lady came to clean for me. She was earlier today than usual, but that was okay. Every thing seemed to go like clockwork, surprisingly.

After all were gone and I could rest, I thought, "Wow! This is almost like life way back when; before the stroke; while I was still working; when it all happened on a daily schedule. That was before I really started to rest. As I tried to relax, the spasms set in... both legs again along with the chills up and down my back. Now I am beginning to think maybe the two go together. My left foot would go into one if I shifted my back. I did not have to move my foot. Finally I got up and went to the computer to check my email for the day.

What was that I was thinking so very early this morning about the butterfly? Did I just emerge from a cocoon today? Is it one that I can stay emerged from, or will I be climbing back in on occasion? The cooler weather? The ejection of water from the house? A combination? What ever the reason. I am just elated to have had today. It was great.

Next month: September