September 1, 2001
From : Kasie
E-mail kasieanne@yahoo.com

Hi. This is a first for me. I just discovered this website and I know the Lord brought me here. I think I have been depressed all my life but I always thought that it was just my personality. I am like my dad. I always just called myself an introverted, meloncholy person. Now I realize I have depression and probably always have.

It seemed to get worse when I was pregnant for the first time. My second child was just born 3 months ago and I have spiralled so low I feel like getting in the car and driving away and never coming back. I feel trapped. I have a feeling of needing to escape. I don't think I would ever have the courage to kill myself but I hate living.

And that makes me feel so ashamed. I have cut myself off from everyone and even my husband has about had enough of me. I finally went and talked to a counsellor about this. She said I can't see a Psychiatrist for 5 months and to go see my family Dr and have her prescribe some meds for me.

I just don't know what to do. And I don't have the willpower to pull myself out of this slump.

I am so grateful for this opportunity to write and maybe someone will have some advice for me. I have a very good relationship with the Lord but I have always wondered why I can't trust Him enough to get me better. I have always blamed it on lack of faith. Thanks for listening.

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