-If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
-Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
-Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
-If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?
-If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
-When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?
-If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell her she has the right to remain silent?
-Why is the work abbreviation so long?
-If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?
-Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
-What do you do when you discover an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?
-Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
-Is it possible to be totally partial?
-What's another word for thesaurus?
-When companies ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
-If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
-Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
-Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream?
-Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
-How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
-Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
-When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
-Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
-Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
-If you shoot a mime, should you use silencer?
-What was the best thing before sliced bread?
-How can they tell that twin lobsters are really twins?
-How does a thermos know when to keep something hot, hot...and something cold, cold?
-What is th speed of dard?
-Why are there braille signs on drive-up ATM's?
-How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
-If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
-If someone with mulitple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
-Instead of talking to you plants, if you yelled at them, would they still grow?  Only to be troubled and insecure?
-Is there another word for synonym?
-Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
-When sig makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
-When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
-Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
-Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
-Why do they report power outages on TV?
-Why do they lock gas station bathrooms?  Are they afraid someone will clean them?
-Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
-If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
-Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
-If your cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?
-Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
-Why are there interstates in Hawaii?
-Why are there flotation devices uder airplane seats instead of parachutes?
-Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations where smoking is prohibited?
-Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
-How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?
-If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on its doors?
-If a cow laughs, does milk come out of its nose?
-If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan?
-If buttered toast lands butter side down and a cat always land on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast on the back of a cat and dropped it?
-If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn on you headlights, what happens?
-You know how most packages say, "Open Here"?  What should you do if the package says, "Open Somewhere Else"?
-Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
-Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
-You know that indestructible little black box that is used on airplanes, why can't they make the whole plane out of that same substance?
-Why is that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn the radio down?
-Why are the called apartments when they're all stuck together?
-What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
-If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?
-If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
-If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
-Why do noses run and feet smell?
-If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses, and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras?
-What is a "free" gift?  Aren't they all?
-After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
-If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
-Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
-How can there be self-help groups?
-Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
-Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
-What happened to Preparations A through G?
-Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?
-If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?
-When you pet bird sees you reading a newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting htere, staring at carpeting?
-What happened to the first 6 ups?
-If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called green or a lemon called a yellow?