• If You Can Read This, I Can Slam On My Brakes And Sue You
  
  
• 1,000,000 Sperm And YOU Were The Fastest??
  
  
• Jesus Loves You, The Rest Of Us Think You're An Idiot.
  
  
• HANG UP AND DRIVE!
  
  
• Where There's A Will . . . I Want To Be In It!
  
  
• Ever Stop To Think, And Forget To Start Again?
  
  
• I Have The Body Of A God... Buddha
  
  
• This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To Me
  
  
• If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
  
  
• This Bumper Sticker Exploits Illiterates
  
  
• Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
  
  
• Honk If Anything Falls Off
  
  
• He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest
  
  
• He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost, But Miles From The Next Exit
  
  
• I Haven't Lost My Mind - It's Backed Up On Disk Somewhere
  
  
• Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
  
  
• I brake for no apparent reason.
  
  
• Forget World Peace -- visualize using your turn signal.
  
  
• Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
  
  
• Rehab is for quitters.
  
  
• Montana--at least our cows are sane!
  
  
• I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to become a vegetarian.
  
  
• Ok, who stopped payment on my reality check.
  
  
• Few women admit their age; fewer men act it.
  
  
• I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
  
  
• IRS: We have what it takes to take what you have.
  
  
• Dates on calendar are closer than they appear.
  
  
• Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  
  
• Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes.
  
  
• Caution: I drive like you.

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