OFFICE DARES
(Seems like a good Jim Carrey routine)
• One Point Office Dares:
- Run one lap around the office at top speed.
- Groan out loud in the bathroom cubicle (at least one other
"non-player" must be in the bathroom at the
time).
- Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning'
to you.
- Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name
and say "Just called to say I can't talk right now.
Bye."
- To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over
your ears and grimace.
- When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and
whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo
good!"
- Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out,
say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way."
- Walk sideways to the photocopier.
- While riding an elevator, gasp dramatically every time the
doors open.
• • • Three Point Office
Dares
- Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him
with double-barreled fingers.
- Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask "Did
you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat
it."
- Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your
voice).
- Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from
the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within
sight).
- Shout random numbers while someone is counting.
• • • • • Five
Point Office Dares
- At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be
nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra
points if you actually launch into it yourself).
- Walk into a very busy person's office and while they
watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on / off
10 times.
- For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as
"Bob."
- Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have
to go do a number two."
- After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad
Jamaican accent. As in, "the report's on your desk,
mon." Keep this up for one hour.
- While an office mate is out, move their chair into the
elevator.
- In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead
repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just
shut up!"
- At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce "As
God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again."
- In a colleagues day-planner, write in 10:00 A.M. - "See
how I look in tights."
- Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You
wanna trade?"
- Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same
person: "Do you hear that?" "What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
- Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why say, "I
can't talk about it. If I told you, then I'd have to kill
you."
- Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during
a very important conference call.
- Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of
your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it
out.
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