The Story

Chapter 20

"Kyle Reeser, Where Are You?"

Bright and early the next morning, the Supercools piled back into their van and left for Indiana. In the back, Charles watched as Joe tried to get more information out of Kyle.
“And you say you ‘just beat him?’” Joe asked. “How is that possible. You don’t ‘just beat’ Graviton!”
“I don’t know, alright?” snapped Kyle. “Maybe it was my cosmic powers resurfacing!”
“Yeah, right, Kyle,” Joe snickered.
“It could be, though, couldn’t it?” asked Charles.
“I suppose,” Joe shrugged. “But I wouldn’t bet the farm.”

In the front seat, Milo and Rina had a heart-to-heart talk.
“I think you should go back to Kyle,” said Milo.
“What?” asked Rina, stunned. “But I thought- I mean, I sort of got the feeling that you- I mean I- Yeah, yes, I guess you’re right. I should try to patch things up with Kyle.” But it’s going to be hard when you keep doing sweet things like that.
“Good,” said Milo. “I just want you to be happy.” With me! Happy with me!
After thinking it over for several minutes, Rina said, “The next time we stop, I’ll talk to Kyle.”

They stopped for lunch in a small diner just outside of Indianapolis. Everyone ate in silence, waiting for the tense confronation. Once the table was cleared, Joe announced, “I’m going to go have a cigarette! Milo, do you smoke?”
“I do now,” said Milo.
“Ooh! I want to start!” said Charles. “I want to get cancer and die!” The three young men bustled quickly from the diner, leaving Rina and Kyle alone at the table.
“I suspect this was arranged,” Kyle said.
“Yeah, I think so,” Rina said. “I think we need to talk. No, don’t say anything. Let me finish. Yes, I know we rushed into a relationship. Maybe be ‘chronologically gifted’ makes me impatient. And yes, I know things have been tense recently. Especially with Milo here. I’ll even admit that when we first met, I sort of entertained ideas about him. But those feelings are gone now, Kyle. They’re gone. I want to make this work. I want us to work.”
“And what,” Kyle said, interrupting, “Makes you think I have any interest in you?”
“Kyle, please. I’m trying to tell you that-“
“No, you listen, you ignorant cow.” Kyle’s voice was cold and harsh. Rina’s lower lip began to tremble. “I am trying to tell you that I find you a vacuous distraction, and a poor excuse for a superheroine. You are airy and graceless. And even if I was interested in dealing romantically with a lesser being like you humans, I surely would never pick such a blithely dull as you.”
Tears were pouring down Rina’s face. ”Lesser human? Oh, Kyle. It’s those powers again, isn’t it? When are you going to face the fact that you’re not omnipotent? You can’t- Oh, nevermind.” Rina folded time around herself, and raced to the van at lightning speed.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” said Rina.
“Okay,” said Milo. He was heartbroken, but he knew better than to admit that to her.

“I don’t wish to speak of it,” said Kyle.
“Okay,” said Joe. He was really curious, but he knew better than to admit that to Kyle.

An hour later, the new Supercoolmobile pulled up in front of 5273 Comet Drive. It was on this spot that Joe’s home in this dimension should’ve been standing. But it wasn’t. In its place, a sprawling country home stretched back across several lots. A sign out front advertised “Baird’s Bed & Breakfast.”
“This seems like as good a place as any to stop for the night,” said Joe. The others agreed. They proceeded up the walkway to the front door, where a strangely familiar woman shuffled out to meet them.
“We’re closed,” said Talula.
“But we really wanted to see the place,” said Joe.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t risk any of y’all’s lives, okay?”
“Risk our lives?” asked Charles. “We’re the Supercools!”
“The whats?”
“We’re superheroes,” said Charles.
“We’re not- nevermind,” said Joe.
“Superheroes, eh? Yeah, you guys seem sort of familiar. I suppose I can trust y’all. Why don’cha come on in.” Talula moved her massive body from the doorway, and the five friends filed inside.
“I can fix you each up with your own room, on account of us being practically out of business, and give you some clothes to change into sos I can do your laundry. Then, we can sit down for the fried chicken I made, and have ourselves a nice chat, how’s that sound?”
“Wow, that’d be great!” said Charles.
“No kidding,” said Joe. “Laundry alone is worth the trip out here!” Several minutes later, Joe was regretting that statement.

The only clothes Talula had to offer the Supercools were discards from local charities and things left behind by previous guests. As a result, the first few minutes of the team’s regrouping in Talula’s kitchen were spent laughing at one another’s outfits.
Milo was wearing a white muscle t-shirt and blue jeans, with a red scarf tied around his throat. All things considered, he didn’t look too bad. Kyle didn’t look half bad either, in brown slacks and a green t-shirt. Charles wore an old workman’s jumpsuit. He was about average on the “bizarre scale.” Rina and Joe, however, kept each other in stitches for several minutes. Rina wore a skin-tight, purple dress with a lavender undershirt and matching stockings. Joe was left with one of Talula’s pull-over sweaters (bright orange), and a pair of burgundy shorts. The Supercools’ mini fashion show kept them all chuckling even as they sat down to dinner.
“So, Miss Baird,” Joe said over his mashed potatoes, “What’s this about danger?”
“The past few weeks, all my customers have been chased away by some sort of super-villain,” confessed Talula Baird. “Someone calling himself ‘Eric the Red.’”
“Um… oh damn?” said Kyle, quizzically.

Further discussion of Talula’s financial difficulties was interrupted by a knock on the door. All six of the house’s current residents went to answer the door.
“Oh, it’s you,” said an unenthusiastic Talula as she opened the door. A greasy man with a plaid coat and a bad toupee pushed his way inside.
“Yes,” said the man. “It’s me. Have you reconsidered my offer?”
“For the last time, Mr. Wes Weasselly, I will not sell you my Bed-And-Breakfast. I don’t care how badly I’m doing now, the place’s my family’s and we’re keeping it!”
“Fine! But you’ll regret saying ‘no,’ Talula! You mark my words!” Mr. Weasselly huffed out of the door.
“Well, he certainly was rude,” remarked Rina. They were her first words since the diner, and everyone was pleased to hear her voice again. Well, Kyle was indifferent, but Milo was ecstatic, so it averaged out to pleased.
“Yes, he certainly was,” said Talula. “But the sad thing is, he might well win in the end. If I can’t get rid of this Red fellow soon, I’m going to have to shut down!”
“Well, we can’t have that,” said Milo. “We’ll split up, and search the house, see what we can find.”
“Bless you,” said Talula Baird.

It was soon decided that the team would split into three groups: Milo with Rina, Charles with Kyle, and Joe (who best knew the house’s layout, having sort of lived there before) on his own. Once the dishes were put away, the Supercools set to their task.
Charles and Kyle began their search in the lower levels of the house, where Talula herself slept and bathed.
“Wow!” Charles gasped, marveling at the autographed pictures laid out in Talula’s study. “Miss Baird sure has had a lot of famous guests! Look, Don Knotts! Phyllis Diller! The Harlem Globetrotters!”
“Whatever,” said Kyle.

Milo and Rina had begun at the rear of the house, where most of the guests would’ve stayed. As she stepped through the nearest door, Rina tripped on a loose board, and tumbled onto the floor. Milo, following closely behind, fell over Rina and onto the bed. As Rina picked herself off the floor, the two companions found themselves both staring at one another.
“Uh…” said Milo.
“Milo,” said Rina.
“Rina, I-“ stammered Milo.
“Milo, look!” cried Rina, breaking the tension. She was pointing to a strange lump of fur in one corner of the room.
“Mr. Weasselly’s hairpiece!” said Milo. “He must be in some kind of danger! We’d better find the others!” He and Rina scrambled from the room.

Joe was working his way through the front of the house, that area which most resembled his ‘real’ home. I’ll probably never get back, thought Joe. As he continued searching, Joe found himself drawn to a bookcase which remarkable resembled one his family had at home. Leaning in for a closer look, Joe was startled as the bookcase turned into the wall, pitching Joe off-balance into a dimly-lit hallway.
A secret passage! thought Joe. He felt, on his hands and knees, in the faint light for his glasses, which had been knocked off his face during the fall.
“My glasses,” he said aloud, “I can’t see without my glasses!”
He continued to feel around on the floor, until a hand guided the glasses back to his face.
“Thanks,” said Joe, looking up to greet his savior. He was definitely surprised to see Eric the Red.

Milo and Rina had met up with Charles and Kyle, and were exchanging stories when Joe burst into the room.
“I just saw Eric the Red!” shouted Joe. “He waved his hands around, and I ran! And… and that makes me a big sissy, doesn’t it?” To their credit, his friends didn’t reply.
“Milo and I found Mr. Weasselly’s hairpiece!” said Rina.
“And look what we came across,” said Charles, holding up a scrap of plaid fabric.
“Jenkies!” cried Joe. “That looks just like Mr. Weasselly’s jacket! It must be a clue!”
“Let’s review what we know,” said Milo. “Someone is using the identity of ‘Eric the Red’ to drive away Miss Baird’s business.”
“Right,” said Rina. “And Mr. Weasselly wants to buy out the waning business, but Talula won’t sell.”
“We know that Eric the Red is a different identity every time he’s encountered,” Joe offered.
“Yeah,” said Charles. “And we’ve found these few bits of Mr. Weasselly’s things.”
“So whoever has a motive to hurt Talula and kidnap Mr. Weasselly must be Eric the Red!” said Kyle, triumphantly.
“Right,” said Joe. “We need to do a little more searching!”
“Okay,” stammered Kyle, his knees knocking. “Why don’t you guys search- I’ll just go wait in the van until it’s all over.”
“Come on, Kyle,” said Milo. “The least you could do is get involved ‘til the mystery is solved.”
“Booga-booga!” shouted Eric the Red, breaking his way suddenly into the gang’s conversation. The Supercools took off running, chased closely by Eric the Red.

The Supercools ran into the main hallway.
Eric the Red followed.
The Supercools ran into the middle of three doors on the left side of the hallway.
Eric the Red pursued.
Charles and Rina emerged from the farthest of three doors on the left side of the hallway.
Eric the Red was right behind them.
Joe and Milo came running from the closest of three doors on the right side of the hallway as Charles, Rina, and Eric the Red disappeared into the middle door on the right. Joe and Milo slipped into the closest door on the left.
Eric the Red slipped into the door as well.
Charles, Milo, Rina, and Eric the Red, burst from the farthest door on the right, and crossed through the farthest door on the left.
Joe was in hot pursuit.
Charles, Rina balanced on his shoulders and riding a unicycle, pedaled his way out of the middle door on the right, just passing Joe and Milo (on a tandem bike) wheeling into the farthest door on the left.
Eric the Red banged open the middle door on the left. He was greeted by the visage of a huge demonic dog. Frightened, Eric the Red stumbled backwards. While one foot found purchase, Eric the Red’s other foot landed on a single rollerskate. He pinwheeled his arms, but was unable to keep himself from bouncing down a flight of nearby stairs. He landed in a heap at the bottom.
Talula and the five Supercools ran to where Eric the Red lay defeated. “Now, we’ll see who Eric the Red really is,” said Rina, pulling off the villain’s red helmet.
“Mr. Weasselly!” gasped Talula.
“That’s right,” said Joe. “Mr. Weasselly wanted to buy out your property, so he could build a megamall. But when you wouldn’t sell, he knew his only chance was to drive away all of your business. So, he purchased an old set of red metal armor, and adopted the guise of Eric the Red. Using the secret passageways strewn throughout the house (which he’d discovered by reading the blueprints), he frightened away each of your customers. He knew if he could bankrupt you, you’d have to sell.”
“And I would’ve gotten away with it, too,” said Mr. Weasselly. “If it wasn’t for you meddling kids and your blasted dog!”
“Uh… we don’t have a dog,” said Charles.
Kyle’s eyes gleamed fiercely.


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