When I was in my younger days,
I weighed a few pounds less.
I needn't hold my tummy in
to wear a belted dress.

But now that I am older,
I've set my body free;
There's comfort of elastic
where once my waist would be.

Inventor of those high-heeled shoes
my feet have not forgiven;
I have to wear a nine now,
but used to wear a seven.

And how about those pantyhosE?
they're sized by weight, you see.
So how come when I put them on,
the crotch is at my knee?

I need to wear these glasses
as the print is getting smaller;
And it wasn't very long ago
I know that I was taller.

Though my hair has turned to silver
and my skin no longer fits;
On the inside, I'm the same old me,
just the outside's changed a bit.
 

What My Mother Taught Me
AUTHOR UNKNOWN TO ME

My mother taught me
TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
"If you're going to kill each other,
do it outside - I just finished cleaning!"

My mother taught me
RELIGION:
"You better pray
that will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me
about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up,
I'm going to knock you
into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me
LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me
FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear,
in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me
IRONY:
"Keep crying and I'll give you
something to cry about."

My mother taught me
about the science of OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me
about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you *look* at the dirt
on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me
about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there
'til all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me
about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a cyclone
swept through your room."

My mother taught me
how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled
because I saw a meteor coming toward you;
would you listen then?"

My mother taught me
about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once,
I've told you a million times
don't  exaggerate!"

My mother taught me
THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world,
and I can take you out."

My mother taught me
about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me
about ENVY:
"There are millions
of less fortunate children in this world
who don't have wonderful parents
like you do!"
 

BEAUTY AND LOVE
AUTHOR UNKNOWN TO ME

"Can I see my baby?"
the happy new mother asked.
When the bundle was nestled in her arms
and she moved the fold of cloth
to look upon his tiny face,
she gasped.
The doctor turned quickly
and looked out the tall hospital window.
The baby had been born without ears.
Time proved that
the baby's hearing was perfect.
It was only his appearance that was marred.
When he rushed home from school one day
and flung himself into his mother's arms,
she sighed,
knowing that his life was to be a succession
of heartbreaks.
He blurted out the tragedy. "A boy,
a big boy...called me a freak"

He grew up, handsome for his misfortune.
A favorite with his fellow students,
he might have been class president,
but for that.
He developed a gift
a talent for literature and music.
"You might mingle with other young people,"
his mother reproved him,
but felt a tenderness in her heart.

The boy's father had a session
with the family physician.
Could nothing be done?
"I believe I could graft on a pair of outer ears,
if they could be procured"
the doctor decided.
Whereupon the search began for a person
who would make such a sacrifice
for a young man.
Two years went by.

Then,
"You are going to the hospital,son.
Mother and I have someone
who will donate the ears you need.
But it's a secret" said the father.
The operation was a brilliant success,
and a new person emerged.
His talents blossomed into genius,
and school and college
became a series of triumphs.
Later he married
and entered the diplomatic service.

"But I must know!" He urged his father.
"Who gave so much for me?
I could never do enough for him."

"I do not believe you could," said the father,
"but the agreement was that
you are not to know...not yet."

The years passed,
their profound secret had  not been revealed,
but the day did come...
one of the darkest days
that ever passes through a son.

He stood with his father
over his mother's casket.
Slowly, tenderly,
the father stretched forth a hand
and raised the thick, reddish-brown hair
to reveal...
that the mother had no outer ears.
"Mother said she was glad she
never let her hair be cut,"
he whispered gently, "
and nobody
ever thought
mother less beautiful,
did they?"

Real beauty
lies not in the physical appearance,
but in the heart.

Real treasure
lies not in what can be seen,
but what cannot be seen.

Real love
lies not in what is done and known,
but in what is done but not known.
"Only in growth, reform, and change,
paradoxically enough,
is true security to be found."

* Anne Morrow Lindbergh
{American Author}

E V E R Y T H I N G
I   N E E D   T O   K N O W...
  I   L E A R N E D   F R O M
N O A H'S    A R K
(SENT TO ME BY AN ON-LINE FRIEND)
AUTHOR UNKNOWN TO ME

 ONE:
Dont miss the boat.
TWO:
Remember that we are all in the same boat.
 THREE:
Plan ahead.
It wasn't raining when Noah built  the Ark.
 FOUR:
Stay fit.
When youre 600 years old,
someone may  ask you
to do  something  really big.
 FIVE:
Dont listen to critics;
just get on with the  job that needs to be done.
SIX:
Build your future on high ground.
SEVEN:
For safety's sake, travel in pairs.
 EIGHT:
Speed isn't always an advantage.
The snails  were on board  with  the cheetahs.
 NINE:
When you're stressed, float a while.
TEN:
Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs;
the  Titanic by  professionals.
ELEVEN:
No matter the storm,
when you are with God,
 there's always a rainbow waiting.

END PAGE ONE
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