A COTTAGE LARGE
Years ago
Couples longed for
A cottage small
By a waterfall
Where they could nestle and cuddle---
And if no waterfall could complete their dream,
They’d make do with a lake or a stream
Or, if push came to shove, a puddle.
But oh, my heavens, how the world has changed---
And our priorities have all been rearranged.A cottage large
Beneath the stars
With a neat garage
For our antique cars.
A dining hall
Which extends and extends
And has quite enough room
For our CEO friends---
With a movie star here
And a sports figure there
And a cordon bleu chef
Who is always in charge---
And we’ll be content
In our cottage large.In our cottage grand
We’ll find romance
On a mile of land
With exotic plants.
Impressionist art---
Not a painting is fake---
And a screening room, too,
For the films we will make.
Plus a personal gym
With a trainer for you
And a trainer for me
And a bed built for four
If things should get out of hand---
And we’ll be content
In our cottage grand.A cottage swell
No one can spoil
Near a wishing well
Which is pumping oil.
And a stable, too,
Filled with bundles of hay
For the ponies we'll breed
For the polo we'll play.
An Olympic-size pool
Where we'll get in the swim
With an orgy or two
At which we both will excel---
And we'll be content
In our cottage swell.A cottage cool
By a sparkling bay---
With a brand new jewel
For each holiday.
All the folks around,
They will flatter and fuss
For the fame we'll achieve
Just because we are us.
We'll have lotions and balms,
We'll have vitamins, too,
And a little cocaine
To add some zip to the fuel---
And we'll be content
In our cottage cool.