Adam and Brooke adored danger
In spite of the bruises and pains---
They loved judo and hockey
And scaling what's rocky
And merrily jumping from planes.
You should have seen their equipment---
They had rackets and balls by the slew,
They had snorkels and skis
And pads for their knees
And even a kyack or two.

But they did not have the same values
In spite of athletics galore---
They still did not have the same values
And soon love flew out of the door.
Values, values,
Please remember that---
Values, values--
That is where it's at.

Hannah and Lee loved to picket,
For them it was protest or die!
They were only too willing
To stop off-shore drilling
And cruelty to bears in Shanghai.
They spoke out on sexist harrassment
And films they considered obscene,
They got into fights
While dining out nights
With those who still smoked nicotine.

Yet they did not have the same values
No matter what both would endorse,
And since they didn't have the same values,
They split in a messy divorce.
Values, values,
Please remember that---
Values, values--
That is where it's at.

Tyler and Claire were like tigers
For sex was the ultimate thrill;
Their primary mission:
To try each position
And some they invented at will.
They couldn't keep their hands off each other,
No matter wherever they were---
By the shore on the rocks,
At a Jack-in-the-Box,
She'd attack him or he'd attack her.

But they did not have the same values---
Their love affair soon was a joke;
They discovered they lacked the same values
On the day that they finally spoke.
Values, values,
Please remember that---
Values, values--
That is where it's at.
 

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