IN YO FACE, ROCK-SOCKING, PINK EYE INFESTED, MOSQUITO FRIENDLY, REGURGITATIONIZING
GESSTWOOD CAMP 2000

Good Lord, the summer of 2000 was interesting!  Interesting like a fox.  But my favourite:) Exaaaactly.  Whaaaaazup!  But seriously, back off, get your own sandwich!  And while you do that, simmuh down now.  Don't wanna follow those rules?  You're cut, take a lap!  I don't make up the rules, I just follow them.  Word to your mother.  Daaa!  Gonna tie my "self" to a tree to a tree, gonna tie my "self" to a tree.  To a tree!  Fill my cup, up.... I just died in your arms tonight... Musta been something you said.  Hey, is that apple crisp good?  Can I try some?  Mmmm.  Peace out, yo.

THE BOSSES.  THE HEAD HONCHOS.  THE BIG KAHUNAS.

KATHY - THE DIRECTOR

An expert at the art of espionage, Kathy uses the skills she learned at the MI6 Academy in England to outsmart campers and site managers alike.  These skills were also put to good use during Mission Impossible nightgames, when Kathy completed her mission not once, but 3 times!  Just do it!

JANINNE - THE PROGRAM DIRECTOR

Janinne the Bean Queen.  She knows the value of a Veggie-Mite sandwich.  Though we had to tell her repeatedly, "no, a kiwi tree will not grow in this climate," and her mad dingo Wanda kept escaping from its coffee can, Janinne was a grade A rapper/drummer, and always friendly to animals (except for that mole she stepped on).

VERNA - THE COOK

Cheesy potatoes?  Cheesy potatoes?  Mmmm.  Cheesy potatoes.  Verna, when are we having Cheesy potatoes?  Speaking of cheese, are we having cheesecake tonight?  Verna was gracious enough to join us this summer all the way from the Royal Winnipeg Ballet in Manitoba to make us Cheesy potatoes.  Yummm.

THE KITCHEN WENCHES

Suck on the Gummie Bear!  (Or in this case, the pickle).  From left to right we have Melissa, Brian, and Annette.  They cooked things.  The things that they cooked tasted good.  Especially the Cheesy Potatoes.  All the kitchen people have special talents: Melissa's is dancing, Brian's is opening his eyes underwater, and Annette's is butt slapping.  They also cook Cheesy Potatoes.

THE TEMPS

Ah yes.  The lovely men and women that were such a help as either volunteers, counsellors for a week, or counsellors in training.  Left to right: Crystal, Cara (top), Sarah (bottom), Jonathan, Mark, and Travis.  Travis was my pick for the Desert Island.  I think the toga-thing was definitely a factor in that decision. 

THE PETS

Yes, that's right!  One day, Billie ran out of the forest and into the hearts of the GessTwood staff forever.  Ah, Billie, you were only with us for a few hours, but I shall treasure those hours for life.

I am very happy that the GessTwood pet this year was a goat, and not those cute little horsehair worms that always end up in the pool.

THE LEFTOVERS

In alphabetical order...

Left: Andrea, the counsellor/on-call chaplain lady.  It was fun to play Hearts and Euchre with her.  Andrea likes frogs, band, and getting a good night's sleep (something which she was sometimes denied at GessTwood).

And to the right we have Beef, one of the original regurgitators.  Beef also licks things off the floor.  I bet he sure makes his mama proud.  Beef follows a special health plan, and this includes lots of red meat.  He does know that Chicken McNuggets are bad for you.  Good God!

Left we have Chris, Beef's comrade in insanity.  Chris is best remembered for his meaningful portrayal of a trailer park dude during the best talent show ever.  His hobbies include "Whaazzzup," and keeping 30 centimetres distance between himself and other people.  Chris abides by the rules.

Right we have Jeff Cool.  You have to say his first and last names together, otherwise it's not the same.  Jeff Cool.  His loud voice came in useful, until he got sick from a regurgitation accident.  Jeff Cool was, though, the other original regugitator.  He helped gross out many a person - especially with a certain French Dressing incident.  Yum.

Left: Jen, (sometimes known as Happy Jen) was instrumental in encouraging the campers to celebrate their culture.  Jen is proud of her Chinese heritage, and not afraid to show it.  Jen also had a really pretty wreath to put on the cabin door.

Right: Jennie was in my cabin for approximately 7.5 weeks out of the 8 we were at camp, which was all fine and good until she stole my man.  Ah, Terree!  Oh well, I'm over him. Nadia ripped off his head and threw him in the garbage anyway.  Jennie is known for pink hair, and her array of wild pants.

Left: Katie, engaging in her nightly conversation with her boyfriend, Jay.  Man, that dude was out there enough to almost be on staff!  That's cool, though.  Katie likes swimming, being a Crazy Dolphin Lady, and band camp.  Heh heh.

That's me (Lacey) to the right.  I am eating a BBQ potato chip.  It tastes good.  Not as good as Cheesy Potatoes, however...

To the left is Mary.  Beef is touching her neck.  As you can see by the look on her face, she likes it.  Mary went around the whole summer saying "Will you touch my neck?  Will you touch my neck?"  We were all like, "Mary, I can't touch your neck right now, I have to chase this goat."  But anyway, enough about Mary, and back to me.

Look right to see Becky Pocock, also known just as Pocock.  This art of making faces has been passed down through the ages by Pocock's wise Tibetan ancestors.  That is why she is a master.  Now, Pocock is in New York, trying to make her way onto the Broadway Stage.  Good luck!

To the left we have Rachael, my sister and my assistant Lifeguard.  Can you believe my bad luck?  Not only do I have to work with this crumb, I have to live with her!  That's ok.  I was the Head Lifeguard, but she can kick my tail in any brawl.  Damn.

Lastly, we have Sarah the Craft/Nurse Lady (seen to your right).  She was nice.  She taught me Contract Rummy, and she let me drink her ice tea.  I didn't get that much, however, because Rachael would always steal it and hoard it for herself.  One time, though, Sarah trapped me in the washroom, and was trying to tickle me.  I tried to climb over the stalls to make my escape, but she whipped out some of her Offensive Tai Chi, captured me, and gave me 6 consecutive swirlies.

SO COOL, THAT SUMMER WAS.  THANKS ALL.  PEACE OUT!