Directness comes under a few names like being forthright, up front and open. By stating our desires and expectations clearly we open a channel for clear communication. Openness is a quality for any relationship. How else can two people from different planets connect and find common interest? Until individuals share honestly, their relationship is merely a fantasy in either or both of their imaginations.

You'll notice that the article titles in the Learning Love and Life library are very plain. I didn't come up with embellished titles because clarity--not creativity--is needed. Readers need to understand the content of each article at a glance, without having to pick through clever phrases.

The website purpose also has to be stated clearly. "The Learning Love and Life website and newsletter are designed to build relationships through scriptural principles, and to focus on issues that either nurture love or limit its growth." This lets you, the reader, know where I, the editor, am coming from.

Why host this website and newsletter for subscribers? What is my purpose? When my wife and I were dating, we have learned that there is so much that can be learned to enhance relationships. Many "common sense" assumptions about love seem to be wrong or based in false concepts. It would be interesting to address several of these misleading concepts as future topics. Sharing what we learn about love, we hope, can be helpful to many others.

The "Learning Love and Life" newsletter is free, and will continue to be free for as long as I have topics to discuss. Don't worry--I don't foresee that pool going dry. What do I have to gain? First of all, it's rewarding to be able to interact with a group of intelligent people who are interested in building the quality of their relationships. Secondly, the newsletter and website provide an efficient means to give exposure to other projects I'm developing. You've seen the ads for my CD, Ageless Love. In my spare time, I'm working on other music CDs, love stories and books. I'll let you know more about them as they become available. The Internet provides unprecedented opportunities to reach out to others.

Now back to the topic. It seems to be a part of being human to hide feelings. However, outside of suppressing anger for calmer reactions, I don't see what purpose it serves to conceal emotions. To feel one thing and say something else only puts barriers in the way of relationships. Let your yes mean yes and your no mean no. Clear messages need to convey real meanings.

When a wife says, "I'm okay," when she really means, "I'm mad at you, and you're supposed to figure out why," her husband hears, "I'm okay." Period. He literally discharges himself of the obligation to delve hidden meanings. In the same way, unspoken love does little to enrich a relationship. If you love them, tell them.

Relationships are made up of thousands of daily interactions over many years. Marriages are either built or eroded by the quality of open sharing. Togetherness, based on honest, loving communication, is a lifetime achievement.

 

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