We all share the universal need to be accepted. No one is really searching for conditional love, judgment or arbitrary abandonment. An unknown author said, "The greatest happiness in life is the conviction that we are loved--loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves."

That is, of course, the real love that our Father in Heaven has for each of us. Acceptance and non-judgment are true gifts of friendship we can give our loved ones.

Misunderstanding, impatience and disappointment are usually products of misplaced expectations, and not so much subversive behaviors by a deliberate malefactor. The next time we lose patience with a child, relative or loved one, let's take a step back and examine our own hearts.

Judgmental reactions remove us from charitable love. Correction and guidance under the influence of the Spirit will have these vital traits: persuasion, patience, gentleness, genuine concern, kindness and understanding based on eternal principles.

Rather than searching for faults, pure love looks for potential. Alexander Pope said, "To err is human, to forgive, divine." Marvin J. Ashton said, "Perhaps the greatest charity comes when we are kind to each other, when we don't judge or categorize someone else, when we simply give each other the benefit of the doubt or remain quiet. Charity is accepting someone's differences, weaknesses and shortcomings; having patience with someone who has let us down; or resisting the impulse to become offended when someone doesn't handle something the way we might have hoped. Charity is refusing to take advantage of another's weakness and being willing to forgive someone who has hurt us."

And from Benjamin Franklin: "I will speak ill of no man, not even in matters of truth; but rather excuse the faults I hear charged upon others, and upon proper occasion speak all the good I know of everybody." Jawaharlal Nehru said, "It is far better to know our own weaknesses and failings than to point out those of others."

Appreciating Ourselves and Others

When my wife was teaching a class, she reminded, "We're all a little weird." A part of accepting the humanness of a loved one is to look to the imperfect masterpiece we are creating of ourselves. Let's learn to laugh at ourselves and appreciate one another's humanness. Joseph Addison said, "Human nature is capable of giving the mind one of the most delightful and most improving entertainments."

A.J. Marshall said, "Nature didn't make us perfect, so she did the next best thing--she made us blind to our faults." Here are some thoughts to get us started laughing at ourselves. To women: God invented man first as practice; To men: Good thing God didn't get it right the first time. Lucky for us, women see some reason to want us in their lives.

"The best humor is that which contains the most humanity, that which is flavored throughout with tenderness and kindness." --William Makepeace Thackery

The funniest people I know share uplifting humor rather than destructive comedy. Laughter should not be at anyone's expense. Rather it should make each of us look inward and see the folly inherent in being human. Kind humor enriches--it doesn't demean.

I love such mirth as does not make friends ashamed to look upon one another the next morning." --Izaak Walton

"Teach us delight in simple things, and mirth that has no bitter springs; forgiveness free of evil done, and love to all men 'neath the sun." --Rudyard Kipling

My best comebacks incubate about 24 hours. Arnold Glasow said, "The brightest things you ever say are those you think about the next day."

Babies teach us lessons in enjoying the delight of interaction. Let's follow their examples of laughter, and uncomplicated enjoyment. Let's appreciate the differences each of us brings into a dynamic world. "When everybody thinks alike," an unknown author said, "nobody thinks very much." We are surrounded by a wonderful diversity of characters. Being ourselves, liking who we are, and enjoying others, we can each do our part to enrich enjoyable living.

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