Today would have been my Grandpa Ray's 86th birthday.   I still think of him everyday.  I wonder what he would think of me now?  What would he think of my family? 

I try not to dwell on his struggle  with Parkinson's Disease or the incredible sadness of his passing.  Once, toward the end of his life, he said, "I hope youse guys don't miss me too much when I'm gone."  I replied that of course we would miss him and that it wouldn't be the same without him.  He just said, "Don't miss me too much,"  That bothered me for a long time, but I finally realized what he was getting at.  He didn't want us to be stuck in grief forever.  He wanted us to carry on and live our lives to the fullest. 

So, to honor his wishes  I remember him as healthy and vital and loving life.  He was the only positive male role model in my life and I feel truly blessed to have had him for my Grandfather.  I try to live my life in a way that would make him proud.  I try to raise my children with the same values that he taught me. 

So, even though he won't see this, I wanted to say,  Happy Birthday Grandpa.  I love you from the bottom of my heart.