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Evils Immortal Realms! |
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- Support Capitol Punishment,
Flog a Politician Today - Legalizing Concealed Weapons
would be just fine if stupidity was outlawed - We're the largest street gang in
America. We're the POLICE - [Windows™ logo] ...and this is your
computer on drugs. Any questions? - Annoy a politician today - THINK - Anime-niac
* - There is no freedom OF religion
without freedom FROM religion - The more I
learn about terrorism, the better I understand the phone company - C code. C
code run. Run,
code, run! (please?) - Bad cop. Bad BAD cop. NO DONUT. - If you drink, don't park. Accidents
cause people! - Support the 28th Amendment: Convicted
felons shall not have the right to demand or expect better treatment or
conditions than the members of the public at large. - My job drives me to drink. If it wasn't for that, I'D QUIT! - If you can read this, I can hit my
brakes and sue you! - Information
Superhighway Official Roadkill - Grad School - It's not just a job, it's
an indenture! - Flush Rush - If ignorance is Bliss, Washington must
be Paradise! - I know that you have a thing for me,
but why is it so small and deformed? - Do Not Underestimate the Power of the
Chocolate Side of the Force! * - Save the whales! Trade them for
valuable prizes! - Nice front bumper you've got there.
Shame if something happened to it.... - "Gun
Control" isn't about guns. It's about control. * - A cat, by any other name, is still a
sneaky little furball that barfs on the furniture - This sticker has been discontinued. - Another Deadline, Another Miracle - Militant
Agnostic. I don't know, and you don't either! - Blessed be the censors, for they shall
truly inhibit the earth - Censorship? We don't have any
censorship. If we did, I couldn't say XXXX or XXXX.. - XXXXXX the censors! - He who hesitates IS LUNCH! - Creature of the
Night - The truth is out there. Trust
no one. Deny everything. - Death Before Dishonor Nothing
Before Coffee - Friends don't let friends boot OS/2™.
- [Windows™ logo] I Don't Do Windows - Balance the Budget. Declare
Politicians as Game and sell Hunting Stamps. - We are IBM™! Windows™ is
IRRELEVANT! You will be ASSIMILATED! * - Campus Crusade for Cthulhu: It Found
Me! - The Cat Philosophy of Life: If you
can't Eat it or Shred it, then Sleep on it. - Welcome to Middle Earth. NOW GO HOME. - Will litigate for food - The way to a man's heart is between the
fourth and fifth ribs - So many men, so little reason to sleep
with any of them - Happiness is the planet Earth in your
rear-view mirror - Be nice to me, or I just might develop psychokinetic powers and destroy Tokyo! * - When Cthulhu Calls, he calls
1-800-Collect™ - How long do I have to be a grad student
before I can petition for tenure? - The meek shall inherit the
Earth. The rest of us are going to the stars! - Dead men tell no tales...
unless you're in forensics - Next year, why not vacation
in the millions of worlds of a used book store? - Carpe DM: Seize the Dungeon
Master - Happy Happy Kill Kill - I didn't do it. You can't
prove it. Nobody saw me. The sheep are lying! - I have seen the truth, and it
makes no sense! - Remember when Windows were washed, mice
were trapped, and UNIX guarded the harem? - Once you pull the pin from
Mr. Grenade, he is no longer your friend. - 1.8 x 1012 furlongs per
fortnight. 'Tis a good Idea, and it doth be the Law. - Always forgive your enemies.
Nothing annoys them more! - I don't need a new religion.
I haven't used up the Old one. - Never trust a smiling GM! * (Ohh hentai!!!) - Why get real? Plastic is cheaper, It doesn't rot, It comes in prettier colors, and it's much easier to clean! - Will build thermonuclear devices for
food - Do Not Meddle
in the Affairs of Dragons, for You are Crunchy and Good with Ketchup. - Those who can, Teach. Those
who cannot teach ARE RUNNING THE SCHOOLS! - Weird Enough for Government
Work - If I could get a firm grip on
reality, I'd choke it! * (I am one!) - Unicorns aren't
mythical... virgins are! * (I have 15 cats!) - I love cats. Want
to trade recipes? - Cats make more sense than men - Men exist because cats won't mow the
lawn. Women exist because sheep can't cook. Neither of these things explain
children. - Abolish mornings! * - Jesus is coming! LOOK BUSY - She said "Harder!" I did
that. She said "Faster!" I did that. She said "Deeper!" I
philosophized. - Am I supposed to be impressed? - I love my country. It's my government I
fear. - Why should we
trust the government with automatic weapons? - Where there's a whip, there's
a way - My cat dislikes the term
"pet." It prefers "friend and confidante." - If guns cause crime, matches cause arson! - Caution Vampire in trunk! - If it isn't fattening, it isn't food! * - The real problem with Baptists is
that they never quite seem to hold them under long enough. - I am suffering from a Sexually
Transmitted Disease: Children! - I want to be Barbie™-- The bitch has
everything! - Cats don't want to own people. They
prefer to lease with an option. - Drive
defensively. Buy a tank. - Don't steal. The government
hates competition. - Fundamentalism means never
having to open your mind - Computers are vehicles for
the mind. They drive you crazy! - Stop the violins. Visualize whirled
peas. - We are Microsoft! Resistance is Futile!
You will be assimilated! - My kid swindled your honor student at
the Ferengi College of Business, where students learn to profit from more than
just mistakes. - My other vehicle was assimilated by the
Borg! - Nice little
planet you've got here. Shame if something happened to it. - Cats keep their claws sharp because
they know that just a purr may not be enough - Anything not nailed down is a cat toy! - Artificial
Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity - A chill in the air, a cat on the lap, a
mug of chocolate, and a good book. Ah, Paradise! - I think,
therefore I am dangerous - Usenet Cheaper than drugs,
just as addictive, but you have to know how to read! - It's worse than you think and
they ARE out to get you! - Trust me I'm a lawyer [picture of shark
] * - You found God? If nobody claims him
in 30 days, he's yours! - Who needs
drugs? I go broke buying books! - Weird Load
* - [pentagram] Give me that REAL
Old-Time Religion! - Book lovers never go to bed alone! - Grow your own dope! Plant a politician!
- Pro-Free Speech. Pro-Gun. Pro-Choice.
PRO-FREEDOM! - Sure you can trust the
Government! Just ask an Indian! - Is it too late to get the
Russians to nuke Washington? - Never shoot to kill. Always
shoot to live. * - [fish with legs] You keep
believing... we'll keep evolving! - Procrastinate Later - My ship finally came in, but it was the
Kobayashi Maru! - Alcohol and calculus don't
mix NEVER DRINK AND DERIVE! - An angry Dragon may eat you,
but an angry Woman is truly dangerous - My ex gave me a reason to
live -- I want Revenge! - Subvert the dominant paradigm! - I'm not nearly
as think as you confused I am! - Don't hate yourself in the
morning -- Sleep till noon! - Practice Safe Housing - Use Condos - Some mornings I
just don't feel like slaying dragons - Closet Extrovert - Babylon Express - When you absolutely
positively don't want anyone to know where it went or how it got there. * - I found Jesus. He was in my trunk
when I got back from Tijuana. - VOTE: REPUBLICAN, it's easier than
THINKING; DEMOCRAT, it's easier than WORKING; Libertarian, it's cheaper than
TAXES - If we are what we eat, I'm fast, cheap
and easy! - I don't deserve
self esteem - It's a control
freak thing. I won't let you understand! - System analysis is the
process of finding exactly the right wrench to pound in the required screw
- Proudly marching to the beat of a
different kettle of fish * - I'm doing my part to piss off the
Religious Reich - The best things in life aren't things - Ignore your rights and
they'll go away - The "New Right" is
fundamentally wrong - Pay no attention to the man behind the
curtain - First they burn books then they burn
people - Oh, no! I turned out just like my
mother! * (I want to be like my mother!) - Question Authority before it Questions You! - A Woman's Place is in the House... and
Senate! - Computers aren't intelligent.
They just think they are. - Civil Disobedience - It's not
just for revolutionaries anymore! - C:\COFFEE.EXE NOT FOUND <A>bort,
<R>etry, <B>rew another pot? - Vote Conservative! There's no mistake
like an old mistake! - Been there.
Done that. Went back for more. - Wu's Law: Never, EVER say "Here,
kitty, kitty" to a Kzin - Computers cut my work in half... and
the boss expects me to put it all back together! - I feel like a new man. Do you have one
I could use? - Murphy was an optimixt! * - Red meat isn't bad for you. Fuzzy,
green meat is bad for you! - I saw Elvis making crop circles - Where are we going? Why am I in this
handbasket? - Free Speech keeps Rush on the air. Free
Thought keeps me from believing him. - Power Corrupts
- Isn't that what it's for? - Real Psychics don't have 1-900 numbers.
They call you... collect! * - Downsizing is good, right? Then let's
fire Uncle Sam! - No thanks. I gave at the orifice. - Hang Up and Drive! - I did not
escape, I have a day pass! - Untie Dexlysics! - Some days, it's just not worth gnawing
through the straps - The problem with religious texts is
that the answers aren't in the back, either. - The fundies
keep telling me I'm going to Hell and they're going to Heaven. If they aren't
there, it won't be Hell, so I guess we're all going to the same place! - There's a sucker reborn every
minute - PT Robertson - Listen to Limbaugh? No thanks, my
parents weren't related * - Forget Love - I want to fall in
Chocolate - Do Not Meddle in the Affairs of
Witches... [picture of frog] * (I'm earning my B.Arts) - B.S. (Phys):
Why does it work? B.S. (Engr): How does it work? B.A. (Acctg): How much will it
cost? B.A. (Arts) You want fries with that? - Go Fascinate Someone Else * - He's YOUR God. They're YOUR rules.
YOU burn in Hell! - Animal testing is futile! The animals
always get nervous and give the wrong answers - B-5/DS9 - Boldly going in circles where
no TV shows have gone before (this week) - Computer
Literacy? You mean my computer is supposed to read? - The computer revolution is
over - the computers won! - I inhaled and I vote - Help! I've tripped and I can't come down! - I was abducted by space aliens and I
vote! - This vehicle leased to: American
Association for the Abolition of Acronym Abuse Regional Group Headquarters Staff
Transport Office Pool (AAAAARGH/STOP) - Will Write Code for Food - I got out of
bed for this? - EARTH FIRST! We can stripmine
the other planets later! - This isn't a life it's a forced March! - They're Lying - Ignore the propaganda. Focus on what
you see. - Life would be so much easier if we just
had the source code - Don't blame me- I'm just visiting this planet! * - Who are you to question why your god
doesn't want me to believe in him? - I am perfectly sane. The
little voices in my head told me so! - If all the world's a stage, I
want better lighting! - If you get any closer, you'd better
have a condom - No job too easy
- No fee too large - Dragons Rescued - Virgins Slain - You earthlings have such strange eating
habits - Put politicians in their place -
Landfills! - I'm disturbed.
I'm depressed. I'm inadequate. I've got it all! - Visualize Whirled Pizza - What we really need is a
moment of SCIENCE in the public schools! - Hukt on fonix reely wurkt for mee! - Some push the envelope, some just lick
it, and some can't find the flap! - [Dragon] Some things must be believed
before they can be seen - [Pegacorn] Some things must be believed
before they can be seen - Stop repeat
offenders Don't re-elect them! - Fundamentalism stops a thinking mind - Remember when conservatives protected
privacy and freedom? - Bobbitt's Tavern. Have a few too many
and we'll cut you off! - A world without war; a dream
to some, a nightmare to the arms manufacturers. - Victims and suspects and
clues, oh my! - Mystery readers are never
clueless (after chapter one) - A tisket, a tasket, a victim
in a casket - The four essential elements:
Means, Motive, Opportunity and Chocolate! - "When you have
eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the
truth." --S. Holmes - Mankind is the result of
millions of years of evolution desidned to produce a better Cat Servant - Cats humor us because they know that
their ancestors ate ours. - There's no Police like Holmes - My husband said he'd leave me if I
didn't stop reading mysteries all the time... Why didn't I start sooner? - Microsoft™: If you can't beat them,
buy them. Apple™: If you can't beat them, sue them. IBM™: If you can't beat
them, ignore them. - Dogs think men are gods. Cats are not
so easily deluded. - It's hard to
Soar with Dragons when you Work with Gargoyles - Bean me up, Scotty! They make lousy
coffee down here - Some days, the most interesting thing
on the TV is a sleeping cat! - Yes, I've heard of "decaf."
What's your point? - Everybody needs something to believe. I
believe I'll have another cup of coffee! - Just bring me the coffee and nobody
will get hurt - Are you sure
this isn't just a live-action roleplaying game? - "Get a life?" I'm a
gamer! I have lots of lives! - If space is a vacuum, who changes the
bag? - Different drummer? I'm my own band! - Forget world peace, visualize using your &+%?*$! Turn signals! - If a man's best friend is his dog,
don't give him your phone number! - Federal Espresso - When you absolutely,
positively have to have something that will get you going, no matter what you
were doing overnight! - Only lawyers get to be judges, and
that's the (F)LAW! - Inside every small problem is
a big one trying to get government funding - Friends let you hide at their
place. Real friends let you hide bodies. - Everything I really needed to
know, I learned in sniper school - Gun Exchange programs would
work great if they gave you a gun when you handed in a criminal! - Guns didn't make America
unsafe, Courts and Congress did! - Don't call us "gun
nuts"-- with a government like ours, we'd be nuts not to have guns! - If you try to get my gun,
don't expect to get my trust - REAL PROGRAMMERS DON'T DOCUMENT If it
was hard to write, it should be impossible to understand! - Always remember: Pillage
first, THEN burn! - My life may be weird, but at
least it's not boring! - User Surly - I am a mallaholic. Please do not give
me directions to the nearest shopping mall! - I like noise. I
need noise. When it's too quiet, I can hear my brain cells dying. - Always proofread. You might have
something out. - It never fails! You start having fun,
and they send in the lawyers. - If you hold a Unix shell up to your
ear, can you hear the C? - The First Amendment grants Freedom of
Speech THE SECOND GUARANTEES IT! - You don't need a pedigree to be a best
friend - ZenCrafters Total enlightenment in
about an hour! - Amateur Rocket Scientist My other
vehicle is in orbit - Witch Wagon - Tailgaters will be Toad - Do autoparanoid
schizophrenic agnostic dyslexic insomniacs lie awake at night wondering if they
might be the dog that's out to get them? - Evolution created anchovies - Man's
ignorance put them on pizza! - Had a life.
Traded it for a faster modem - Mean People Suck - I owe it all to
my boss - Ulcers, nausea, paranoia... - Smoking Cures Ham - Most men would respect a woman's mind
more if it bounced gently as she walked. - Sanity is a
state of mind ...but the taxes are so high, I had to move away. - Wizard Wagon - Tailgaters will be toad - Objects in mirror may have flunked
driver ed - Nine out of ten men who have tried
camels prefer women. - In space, your cat can't hear you open
the can - Miskatonic Summer Games - Fastest food
in Arkham - A closed mind
doesn't need drugs-- It's already wasted - Getting a free kitten proves that you
don't need money to get love - Life's a beach
- and we're just surfing time - Reunite Gondwanaland - You! Out of the
gene pool! * - REAL SCOTSMEN WEAR KILTS because
sheep can hear a zipper at 500 yards! - GO AHEAD, HONK If I can hear you,
you're in range - Driver carries no more than
$20 worth of ammunition - DO NOT DISTURB Occupant is
disturbed enough already - BEEN THERE, DONE THAT - Can't
remember why... - Cats are children that you don't have
to send to college - I'm a Woman, not a Womb! - Smoking is like sex-- It should always
be between consenting adults in private - Omnipotent
Omniscient Omnibenevolent - Pick two. - If we can put a man on the moon, why
not all of them? * (I don't wanna get rid of them! I wanna play with them! ^_^) - To a Cat, People are just Furniture
that does Tricks - WARNING: The Attorney General has determined that Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms can be dangerous to your health, and get away with it! - To a dog, you're one of the family. To
a cat, you're one of the help. - My kid sells term papers to your honor
student - No government
is better than NO GOVERNMENT! - Never trust a government that
doesn't trust YOU! - Give the anarchists an inch,
and the next thing you know, they want to be in charge! - REPEAL INHIBITION! - I'm only driving this because aliens
ate my Volvo * (No, It was a dodge) - Come out, come
out, whatever you are! * - People are more passionately opposed
to wearing fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than bikers.
- I can't go to work today. The
voices told me to stay home and clean the guns. - You'd be like this, too, if they
dropped a house on your sister! - Freedom of Religion means ALL Religions
- If a man's home is his castle, he can
learn to clean it! * - Learn from your parents' mistakes,
USE BIRTH CONTROL - We've got ENOUGH Youth, what
we NEED is a Fountain of SMART! - Where there's a will, I want
to be in it! - Out of mind - Back in 5
minutes - I get plenty of exercise just pushing my luck! - The more people I meet, the more I like
my dog! - The more people I meet, the better I
like my cat! - WARNING! Dates in calendar are closer
than they appear! - It's lonely at
the top... but you eat better. - WORK is for people who don't
know how to FISH - Work is for people who don't
SURF THE NET - Cats make great pets -- out of their
owners - Ask me about my
vow of silence - Why suffer from insanity when
you can revel in it? - "Normal" is a
setting on my washing machine. - Few women admit their age.
Fewer men act it. - Leave Earth Now - Ask Me How - Please don't honk - Driver
may go Postal if awakened - Reality is the Anchovy on the Pizza of
Life - i suport publik edjicashun - Support the Math Illiteracy Tax - Buy
Lottery Tickets - Reality is the Hairball in the Catnap
of Life - Cats are amazing! Cute, furry,
friendly, and only 140 calories per serving! - ALL MEN ARE ANIMALS! but if you can
train them, they make good pets... - In case of Rapture, can I have your
car? - Fight Organized Crime -- Don't Re-elect
ANYONE! - Will Genetically Engineer Organisms For
Food - I'm not lost,
I'm exploring! - Give a man a fish, and he will eat for
one day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat drinking beer every day! - I am getting so
tired of slitting the throats of people who say I'm a violent psychopath! - Political
Correctness is Intellectual Fascism - THANK GOD FOR ATHEISM -- Without that,
I'd have nothing to believe in! - POSTAL! (with graphic of speeding
bullet) - "NOT A MORNING PERSON" DOES NOT EVEN BEGIN TO DESCRIBE IT! - THIMK - A good university needs a football team
like a fish needs a bicycle. * - A Real Friend isn't someone that you
use once and throw away, a Real Friend is someone that you can use again and
again! - All right, who put the "Morning People" in charge? - When cryptography is outlawed,
7c%K@mp8T=;Rfs9bVhi*5xFwW/Q[uY - Beautiful women don't intimidate me,
but I sure wish they would try! - The first cup of coffee recapitulates
phylogeny - It's OUR money, not theIRS! * - FREE TIBET! -- with weapons
technology purchase - EARTH IS FULL!
GO HOME! - Tourist season is coming up!
Don't forget your license! - Those who dance are thought
mad by those who hear not the music. - Sona si Latine loqueris! [translation:
Honk if you speak Latin!] - Quantum materiae materietur marmota
monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? [Latin equivalent of the
infamous woodchuck question] - Illiud Latine dici non potest. [Latin
for "You can't say that in latin."] - Stand aside, plebians! I am on Imperial business! - There are two means of refuge from the
miseries of life - music and cats. -- Albert Schweitzer - 150 Million True Believers. 144,000
taken up in the Rapture. Do YOU feel LUCKY? - Some days, it's just not worth crawling
out of the primordial ooze. - Carpe Noctem - Anything worth
doing happens after dark! - I have NOT lost my mind. It's
backed up on the server. (and the network is down again...) - Seven out of ten voices in my
head say "Call in sick" - I get along with God just
fine. It's his fan clubs that I can't stand. - CHAOS - More than a theory,
it's the Way of Life - If I want to hear the pitter-patter of
little feet, I'LL PUT SHOES ON THE CAT! - All around me I see Chaos, Panic and Disorder. At last, my work here is done! - PARTY SKYCLAD! - Jesus loves you. I don't.
Now, BACK OFF! - Jesus loves you. Everyone
else thinks you're an asshole. - This space intentionally left blank - I'm not really a bitch. I've just had
PMS for 30 years. - Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I am a
Rocket Scientist! - Entropy was just a concept, until I got
a cat! - The fact that no one
understands you does NOT make you an Artist! - I don't know what your
problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. - WORK as if you don't need the
money. LOVE as if you've never been hurt. DANCE as if no one is watching. - Be reasonable. DO IT MY WAY! - Lingua mortua sola lingua bona est.
[translation: The only good language is a dead language.] - Old lawyers never die -- they just lose
their appeal! - How many roads must a man go down
before he'll admit that he's lost? - Question
Authority - Don't ask why, just DO IT! * - If the Rapture would rid us of some
of these idiots, it couldn't come soon enough! - If you believe you can tell me what to think, I believe I can tell you where to go. - CUSTER WORE ARROW SHIRTS - We do not
inherit the Earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children. - I'll "get a life"
when someone can prove that it's better than what I've got now. - Knowledge
is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be Evil.
- ALPHA FEMALE - CARPE BANDWIDTH! - Remember when this [Christian fish]
wasn't a WARNING LABEL? - Life's a Witch... and then you fly! - My other vehicle is a broom! - Save a horse, ride a cowboy - I'm not Duckin' Frunk! - Gun Control means using both
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