"LITTER BOX LINGO"by Rocky

You like a clean litter box - people like things to be clean -
it's a good partnership!
To keep it that way follow these simple rules.
After your box has been cleaned and filled with fresh litter
let them enjoy the results of their labors before you jump in.

(Wait awhile - 5 or 10 minutes seems fair -
since people have some strange notion that things
should STAY clean!)
This is odd, since they would never say to a guest,
"Please don't use the toilet yet - I just cleaned it!"

Litter scatters very easily (with a little help)
and people love any excuse to drag out their "ear deafening, life threatening" vacuum cleaners!
For this reason you may want to keep scattering to a minimum!

However, to add a little excitement to an otherwise boring day,
you can try this. If you scratch vigorously enough
you can send more than just litter
flying over the sides of your box!
This allows you to get in a quick game of "Floor Hockey"
before someone scoops up your "puck"!

This last rule is very important.
A good time to rid yourself of all that extra food
you begged for is NOT just as guests arrive!
PEOPLE HATE THAT!

This is also strange considering all the obnoxious odors
they subject YOU to on a daily basis!
Hair spray, perfume, cleaning supplies,
those sprays that are supposed
to discourage you from clawing the furniture (yeah, right!),
and cigarette smoke - the list is endless!
And they complain about the one odor you produce!
(A "natural" one at that!)