The Rules For Sleep For Cats

From Harold Reynolds In order to have enough energy for playing, a Cat must get plenty of sleep. It is generally not difficult to find a comfortable place to curl up. Any place a human likes to sit is good, especially if it contrasts with your fur colour. If it's in a sunbeam or near a heating duct or radiator, so much the better. Of course, good places also exist outdoors, but have the disadvantages of being seasonal and dependent on current and previous weather conditions such as rain. Open windows are a good compromise.

A) Snoring is not a talent unique to humans - if the Cat is sharing a bed with two humans, the well skilled Cat can cause one of the humans to be blamed/swatted/smacked for the deed by the other.

B) If your humans don't let you into the bedroom at night, make them suffer for it. Even if they give you a nice warm room of your own to sleep in at night, with a Cat-door to the outside world, that just isn't good enough. There are several ways of registering your disapproval.

  1. Trash the room they give you to sleep in. After all, the humans don't sleep in it - so why should you?
  2. Fight noisily with other Cats in the neighbourhood, just outside their bedroom window. Make sure that you appear in the morning with as many fresh scars as possible. Spend some time perfecting an aggrieved "Well, I wouldn't have all these injuries if you only let me sleep in the bedroom at night" expression.
  3. When they finally rise and take a shower or a bath, locate the appropriate drainpipe and yowl up it. That amplified and disembodied "Meow" is sure to surprise them - as is the length of time you can do this without getting hoarse.
  4. When they finally come downstairs, and call for you, refuse to use the Cat-door to enter the house. There's a perfectly good front door they can open. Of course, if they should anticipate you by opening the front door and calling, ignore them. You should only appear by the front door and yowl once they've closed it

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