The Literary Cat
THE CAT'S SONG
Mine, says the cat, putting out his paw of darkness.
Let us walk in the woods, says the cat.
You feed me, I try to feed you, we are friends,
Let us rub our bodies together and talk of touch.
Come I will teach you to dance as naturally
THE NAMING OF CATS
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
(from Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats)
WHERE THE DOG AND CAT CAME FROM
A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer "Where do pets come from?"
Adam said, "Lord, when I was in the garden, you walked with me every day. Now I do not see you anymore. I am lonesome here and it is difficult for me to remember how much you love me."
And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you forever and who will be reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of.
And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam. And it was a good animal. And God was pleased. And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and he wagged his tail. And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal."
And God said, "No problem! Because I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, "and you will call him Dog."
And Dog lived with Adam and was a companion to him and loved him. And Adam was comforted. And God was pleased. And Dog was content and wagged his tail.
After a while, it came to pass that Adam's guardian angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam has become filled with pride. He struts and preens like peacock and he believes he is worthy of adoration. Dog had indeed taught him that he is loved, but perhaps too well."
And God said, "No problem! I will create for him a companion who will be with him forever and who will see him as he is. The companion will remind him of his limitations, so he will know that he is not always worth of adoration."
And God created Cat to be a companion to Adam. And Cat would not obey Adam.
And when Adam gazed into Cat's eyes, he was reminded that he was not the supreme being. And Adam learned humility.
And God was pleased.
And Adam was greatly improved.
And Dog was happy.
And the Cat didn't give a shit one way or the other
author unknown
My lover, my friend, my slave, my toy, says
the cat making on your chest his gesture of drawing
milk from his mother's forgotten breasts.
I'll teach you to read the tabloid of scents,
to fade into shadow, wait like a trap, to hunt.
Now I lay this plump warm mouse on your mat.
says the cat, although I am more equal than you.
Can you leap twenty times the height of your body?
Can you run up and down trees? Jump between roofs?
My emotions are pure as salt crystals and as hard.
My lusts glow like my eyes. I sing to you in the mornings
walking round and round your bed and into your face.
as falling asleep and waking and stretching long, long.
I speak greed with my paws and fear with my whiskers.
Envy lashes my tail. Love speaks me entire, a word
of fur.
I will teach you to be still as an egg
and to slip like the ghost of wind through the grass.
by T.S. Eliot
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Billy Bailey -
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentlemen, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter -
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a cat needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep his tail perpendicular,
Or spread out his whiskers, or cherish his pride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum -
Names that never belong to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover -
But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.
author unknown; from a friend of mine at work
