My Story (Or Truth IS Stranger Than Fiction)(dated early 1998)

I was a single mother, working in a nightclub, raising 2 daughters, 1 of which has cerebral palsy. Part of this started because of an ongoing debate with Robin's pre-school (she was 4 at the time). I was adamant on treating Lisa (her older sister) & her the same. I didn't believe in treating Robin any differently. They, on the other hand, felt she deserved special care, & frequently treated Robin as if she were to be placed in a plastic bubble. Granted, Robin couldn't walk, but she was as cognizant & bright as any 4 year old, if not more so, & I fully believe that was due to how she was raised. Robin had come down the chicken pox 1 day, & I treated it at home with calamine lotion, oatmeal baths, & Childrens' Tylenol. Robin had been out of school for about a week. After she was past the contagious stage, I sent her back to school.... BIG mistake. They called CPS on me for medical neglect (because Robin had scratched her chicken pox like most kids have done). A worker was called to my home.

Let me go into what happened then:



Cinda Crum, the 1st worker, came to my home. At the time, I had 2 friends staying with me on vacation from Canada, who witnessed this scene. She asked me if Robin had seen a doctor & I told her no. I gave her the number to my pediatrician, my babysitter, my neighbors, landlord, etc. I also invited her to talk to my older daughter Lisa & check my amentities. Knowing the history of CPS, I was open & cooperative, seeing this nightmare happen to many friends of mine. She replied, "No, I'll just investigate." She spoke to ONE person, my pediatrician, & he said he hadn't seen Robin for chicken pox. Of course not, I had kept her home. So Cinda, based on her "investigation" of 24 hours & ONE phone call, took Robin into custody the next day while she was in school, & I was given a court date. Needless to say, I was furious. When the court date arrived, I went to court. They told me 30 days & Robin would be returned. I was relieved, but angry nonetheless. I was then told to go to a medical staffing for Robin. I explained to the worker (Cinda) that I had no transportation at the time. She said that she would call my beeper & page me at a particular time on that day to tell me she would come & take me to the staffing. It would be easier than to call her since she was in & out of her office all day long on different cases. I never got any such call, & right after the staffing took place she came over to my apartment & told me since I hadn't shown up Robin would be gone for6 MONTHS!I was LIVID. Especially since SHE told me she would pick me up. In court, she stated that she told me to call HER... now how could I do that when she was never in the office? HRM. So I go back to court, & all these other allegations come out, all of a sudden. For instance, bruises on Robin her school had noticed.. although all of them were either NOT DIAGNOSTIC OF ABUSE, or UNFOUNDED. These things were listed in CPS' case report, but the judge saw "bruises", not the "UNFOUNDED" or "NOT DIAGNOSTIC OF ABUSE". It seems he didn't read it thoroughly, & just plain didn't seem to care. For some reason these "bruises" still got listed, altho none of them were suspicious of anything derogatory. (she has an older sister & she has many friends, you moms know what it's like, kids get bumps & bruises all the time). Cinda also stated in her report that Robin had "empatigo" instead of "chicken pox", & she was being given antibiotics while in care. Strangely enough, Cinda was on leave for 2 weeks soon after because she had CAUGHT empatigo from Robin (those of you who know about empatigo know this is impossible to catch when a child is on antibiotics.)when not I, her sister, no one at school, none of her sitters, nor either of my houseguests caught this "empatigo". She also came back to work showing no scars or marks that I could see.. HRM. So this is how it started.



Cinda Crum got thrown off the case about 1 month later (I wonder why.. incompetence???) Prior to her departure, my daughter's godfather was with me when Cinda asked me to sign a document proclaiming I was guilty, & when I questioned her, she told me "don't worry about how it's written...", trying to get me to sign this document. Since then I have learned she is not the only one who writes leading or untrue things in their reports & when questioned gives the same excuse : "Oh it's just written that way, it doesn't mean anything." She also wrote in her report that Robin is paralyzed from the waist down, which is untrue, Robin has cerebral palsy ...not even a similar comparison. So these are just a few examples of how incompetently this case started off.



Dyanne Davis was assigned as Lisa's (Protective supervision) worker (she was still in my custody), & I had begun to fall apart mentally because I was going to a therapist assigned by CPS (at the court's request) & trying to arrange specialized parenting classes & fighting the accusations, & trying to survive financially & take care of Lisa, as well as be strong for her. Lisa missed her sister terribly. They were always so close, & Lisa was feeling the effects of her sister being gone, & I had tried so hard to make up for it. It was incredibly stressful, needless to say, especially as a single mother with a limited income. Dyanne came over one day & told me of a food & clothing bank her office offered. I told her we would be grateful for any help we could get our hands on. Nothing was ever brought up about it again from Dyanne. Not one more mention of it from that day forward. Surprised? I'm not, and you shouldn't be.



So this goes on till November. (I was dating my present husband by this time, so he can attest to this following account). The day in question, Lisa & I had gone to a cybercafe we frequented, & when we returned, the next door neighbors (a family of gypsies I had befriended) came over telling me 2 workers had come to their place knocking & poking & asking questions... they (my neighbors) didn't know what was going on & were scared (they homeschooled their children & the state looks down on that). I didn't think much of it, & told them I would take of it. I left for work at 7 pm, & left Lisa with them as usual (we lived in a duplex...the whole family took part in caring for Lisa). I came home with a friend at 3 am to find she was gone, & the family said CPS came & took her, telling them that Lisa was in an unfit environment. When I asked CPS why they said they had a call I had left Lisa alone (funny since CPS was there earlier in the day & the family was THERE when they took her). STRANGE???When it comes to CPS, hardly.



So when Lisa goes into custody, I absolutely lose it. I tried to get my older adoptive brother & sister-in-law to take them. They lived in New Jersey, & had once cared for the children before for 6 months while I was rebuilding my life after the devastation of Hurricane Andrew (and for that I will always be grateful to them) I was afraid Lisa would go into her grandfather's custody (paternal.. I'll explain in a minute). After the 6 month period, when I had gotten back on my feet, I got the girls back & all was well. They offered to help again this time. Out of the blue, this NEW worker (Irene, the one reassigned after Cinda was taken off) got a hold of my brother & sister-in-law. After talking to her, they changed their minds, all of a sudden, without much of an explanation, & we haven't spoken since. Why? I felt very hurt & angry that my own brother tended to believe an CPS worker whom he didn't know over his own sister when he had cared for my children before. I found that Irene lied to them telling them Robin "looked like an Ethiopian when she came into care" (I have pix to prove otherwise, like the one at the top of this page), that her hair was falling out, & she was malnourished. She THEN contacted my adoptive mother, & began telling HER things. I don't know why since my adoptive mother hadn't seen the girls in almost 2 years & wasn't being considered for custody. My adoptive family comes from a small sheltered town, & they believe the idea that the state portrays, the gov't wouldn't lie or exaggerate to anyone, & everything they do is right & just. My adoptive mother & I no longer speak & I'll soon tell you why.



So I break down, lose my apartment, & move into an efficiency with a friend. Mike & I became serious, only to find out that I was pregnant, in the midst of all this. These monsters had ripped apart my life with my girls, & I had nothing. All my life I had been such a strong person, stronger than anyone I had ever known. I had gone through a lot before I had the girls, & I even had a tough time when I was pregnant with the girls, but I made it, & we came out on top. Because I was a survivor.. until now. Everything I had done was for Lisa & Robin. Those girls were everything to me. To take away all I had, was pure hell. I didn't know what to do. So I decided to take some friends up on an invitation to go to Dallas & complete all my court tasks out there where I could concentrate, without interference from CPS (who was consistently harassing me) & be with UNBIASED parties, who CARED. I was there a month & a half, called my daughters consistently. It seems that Mike couldn't live without me so he asked me to marry him .He flew me home directly, & with his strength I felt renewed. I was NOT about to let my son be ripped apart like my girls by the state, so I decided on adoption. THEY are the reason I placed my son for adoption and no other reason. Makes me sick because I wanted my son more than anything in the world...CPS became suspicious of me (thank God I carried small) & during this, they decided to push me even harder (I assume to see how far I would go, & how much I could take). They had me go to counselor after counselor to try to get me to admit to all these heinous things they said I did. They also wanted me to attend 8 weeks of domestic violence counseling. Why?

Because an old police report of SEVEN years ago stated that I filed a complaint against an old landlord that hit on me. He hit on me, that was all. Isolated incident. Seven years ago. THIS is what they come up with.

They also, based on an allegation that I was using crack cocaine (made by Lisa's paternal grandfather) seven years ago, came up with putting me through 6 weeks of substance abuse counseling... EVEN THOUGH I HAD PROVED THE ALLEGATIONS WRONG 7 YEARS PRIOR!!!

So needless to say, the counseler which kept saying I was in denial, because I wouldn't admit to whatever CPS put on paper; the domestic violence & substance abuse counseling that I felt put undue stress on me because I didn't belong in; took a severe toll on me, especially being pregnant & knowing I wasn't able to keep my son, for fear of CPS The counselors for the domestic violence & subtsance abuse cancelled the counseling because the allegations were unfounded, but that mattered nothing to the court. They just moved on to whatever other dirt they could dig up.



So then the allegations came out about me regarding Lisa. What did they have?

A police report that Lisa was wandering away from home at age 5. Okay. We then lived in a duplex in a very residential, nice, quiet nieghborhood, & we had a 6-foot wooden fence surrounding the backyard. Lisa was playing in the backyard & I was in the house. Robin was on the floor playing. I went into my bedroom. Lisa heard some kids playing on the other side of the fence (another backyard) & somehow opened the gate to get over there. The mother called the police (dunno why). Minutes later cop knocks on my door, asking where my daughter is.. I go out in the backyard & she's not there. So the cop takes me AROUND THE WHOLE block, & writes in his report that Lisa was "wandering unsupervised several blocks away." & that Robin was "unsupervised" on the kitchen floor. So now because I'm not in the same room means she was unsupervised??? & how would he know if I was or wasn't in the same room with her? *shaking my head* So now I guess I should have kept Lisa chained to the house. So this is the entirety of what they had on Lisa.



Sounds crazy eh? Well it's all true & I can prove it. It gets beter. So because my adoptive brother backed out out of the blue (still baffles me wondering what this worker said to them to get them to back out of helping me out), Lisa goes into her grandfather's care. Why did that bother me? Because

when his son (Lisa's father) had to go to court for child support, his FATHER had to get 2 DNA tests to make sure Lisa was his...

HE filed allegations against me in 1991 saying I was doing crack, so I lost Lisa for 3 weeks while I proved I did no drugs...

& during Hurricane Andrew, he would NOT take Lisa since Robin was in the hospital. He (I swear to this but I can't find the paper) made me sign a document & have my then boyfriend witness it saying he would only have her for a couple hours.

He came very infrequently to pick up Lisa (for his son, since Dean Jr. never came to pick her up) & was VERY controlling with Lisa, ordering her around and such..

& also he asked my own adoptive MOTHER to take my daughter from me, after he made the "crack" allegations back in 1991.

So you can see some of the reasons I wasn't too keen on the idea of him having custody of my daughter.



Since Lisa went into Dean's (grandfather's) care, he said

she was underweight (not true, Robin's ex-foster mother knows this. She gained at most 2 pounds...)

He also tries to take credit for Lisa's grades in school, which are A's...(she was in advanced classes in my care),

and says she was afraid of men between the ages of 18-35 (except her father of course) (this isn't true because she adored all my male friends & Mike & they have testified).

He said she was timid & shy (HA) & that one time she grabbed her grandmother's breasts & when told it was inappropriate, she told them I let her do it all the time. That's just sick. To even SUGGEST such a thing makes me want to vomit.

He cut her hair (SHORT, when she loved her long hair) & he got her glasses(she never had a vision problem before).

My daughter was reading at age 3 & he tried to take credit for it. So you can imagine...

he also (still) listens in on every call Mike & I make to her.

He has made accusations that I picked scabs on her & her sister & made them cry & bleed with my long nails (I have never had long nails till about 6 months ago, as my husband can attest).

He said that she said I had her & Robin in a hotel room where a man put feathers on her & took pictures of me naked (WHAT???)

and also that she went to a store by herself one night because she was hungry & had no money for food & the guy told her to go home (yeah right like they wouldn't call the cops on me)..

On some papers in school Lisa put Lisa Sage (her dad's name) instead of Lisa Morris (her given name). That's not something that a child would do without some sort of provocation.

He has even gotten my adoptive mother under his control. She, although she has only seen the girls 3 times in their lifetime, wrote a letter to the judge, saying my daughters were "pale & listless" when they came to visit (the picture on this page shows the girls the last time my adoptive mother saw my daughters), & that she feared for them because I never fed them & was too harsh on them. She also lied & said that I had been engaged numerous times although she could not provide any names, so she doubted my wedding would happen. She also feared for the girls if anyone left me alone with them. This woman is also a self-proclaimed "Christian". If all this true, why did she wait one & a half years into the case to speak up? Why didn't she ask for custody? Why did she never say anything to anyone before? & strangely enough, Dean brought Lisa to visit my adoptive family right before this all happened. Coincidence??? (They live in New Jersey, as does some of Dean's family it seems)

Let me give you & idea of what kind of man has my little girl now: Dean Jr (Lisa's father, age 30)never goes anywhere without "Papa". He does not even BREATHE w/out asking "daddy". You call the house? It's DEAN SR on the answering machine saying that he's not in (not the family) & to leave HIM a message. No 1 can get close to Lisa w/out him around. The mailbox has HIS name, and HIS name alone. If Mike & I speak to Lisa's father about weekend plans with Lisa? He has to get back to us, because he can't make a firm decision on his own.

Even on Christmas before last, he wanted us to meet him somewhere with(they live 65 or so miles away from us)Lisa's presents so HE could give them to her. He was FURIOUS when we dropped her Christmas stocking off at their house when they weren't home. Oh I could go on but you get the idea.



So now Lisa is so "traumatized" by what I've done to her, but all the allegations come from one source. The judge likes this guy (don't ask me why) but may be starting to see him for what he is Why? Well after 2 failed Guardian Ad Litems on this case (Guardian Ad Litems are assigned to speak for the child, so we went all this time w/out one), the present one made a surprise visit to Dean's home (he HATED that & got very angry with her) & pulled Lisa aside away from everyone else to speak with her. She asked Lisa how she felt about me. Lisa told her "Well, Mommy's a liar" "Why do you say that Lisa?" "Because Grandpa says that Mommy lies so much that he can't keep them straight"... Lisa has also told people that Grandpa told her that I don't like him, among other things. I found recently that he was reprimanded because when she first went into his care, when she was 6 years old, he was giving her baths!! (THIS makes me FURIOUS!!!) ... the Guardian Ad Litem also sees this man for what he is (as does Robin's foster mother), & has presented this to the court, so there may be hope yet. Now I'm worried about what he's put into her head. Her ex-therapist thinks Dean's a saint, (well GRANDPA wouldn't lie, now would he?)and goes along w/ whatever he says. I was given a psychological avaluation that said I did not fit the profile of a child abuser, I was given an evaluation for family therapy with Lisa which was great.. Lisa is always happy to see me... & I have not seen Lisa in 6 months.. why? Because Lisa's therapist says that "according to reports" (from Dean maybe???)she manages an enormous amount of stress prior to seeing me.. (MAYBE BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO SEE ME???) He tried to say in court this past hearing that she is HYPER when I call. (I wonder why!!!!!!! HRM.) He cancelled visits between her & Robin FOUR TIMES IN A ROW.. he says they were sick, giving it to each other back & forth..) 4 WEEKS IN A ROW?? YEAH!! RIGHT!!! Anyway, now we have to cooridinate family therapy DOWN BY DEAN, because Lisa is comfortable in the BUILDING??? (they live 65 miles away, mind you)...Heaven forbid Dean DRIVE anywhere. Everything must be HIS way, it seems. & get this: DEAN wants to be involved in OUR family THERAPY!!! I am anxious & have been pushing for family therapy, & this is how that has gone...

It started with supervised visitation with Lisa. That was fine, except for the nitpicking by Dean of course. One thing that Mike witnessed that he thought that was major that seemed to get ignored was during one visit when we brought Robin to see Lisa (visits took place in the CPS building), & when we were about to leave, I brought Robin into the bathroom so she could go to the bathroom, & Lisa asked Grandpa if she could push Robin in her stroller to the car. He told her no & tried to make an exit, which Mike stopped. Robin then became agitated because Grandpa was trying to leave & she wanted to push Robin, so he began YANKING HER AROUND BY THE ARM (this was witnessed by Dyanne Davis, Lisa's worker who denies this). I didn't see this, Mike did, & this was dismissed by the court as though they never heard it.

After that Lisa's therapist recommended that supervised visits be replaced by family therapy. I was anxious to do this after what Lisa had been through. So Dean was required to give them the court order, which he never did, so it was delayed. When we went to court, the therapist blamed it not on Dean but on the fact that "they were slow to act"... so instead they wanted an evaluation to see if we were READY for family therapy (another ploy to delay things). So I jumped on that & the evaluation was very positive. So now what's the holdup? Got me. I haven't seen Lisa in over 6 months, sans the 2 evaluation sessions (which of course had to take place in the "building Lisa is comfortable with" down by Dean)

So why is this case taking so long?





Dean Sr (obviously) & why isn't Lisa's father speaking up? Because he's a puppet of Daddy since he's so manipulative & controlling. Funny since when Robin got taken I called Lisa's dad & asked him to take her for a couple of days so they didn't take her as well.. & he told me & I QUOTE:"I have no problem with the way you are raising Lisa"

And over 4 YEARS after all the times Dean Sr has picked Lisa up & such.. not a WORD was said about ANYTHING.. this is all after she went into his home... anyway, even thru those couple of days she was with him they kept asking me when she would be coming back to me .. *shaking my head*..

Irene (the new case worker) after talking to my adoptive mom & my adoptive mom writing that letter, continuously MISREPORTED incidents... our visitation with Robin got yanked when she was about to come home because of the following Misreports:





Mike & I took our 1 year anniversary trip for the weekend to New Orleans..we told Robin's foster mom (who isn't blind to this & has been fighting for us from day one) we would be happy to have another weekend with Robin before she returned home. We called everyone necessary to make arrangements. It got reported by Irene that we left contacting no one (which wasn't true) & we would rather go to New Orleans to a vampire booksigning then be with my daughter.

A very good friend drove me & Robin back to the foster mom (IN MY CAR)'s place at the end of one visit when Mike couldn't. It got taken as "a friend she met on the internet took Robin back"

Robin's bed here is maybe 6 inches from the ground with a plastic guardrail the length of the bed. She was here overnight one night, & in the morning before we woke up she managed to wiggle her way out of bed & crawl into our room to wake us up. We thought nothing of it. She got a small tiny scrape on her side, & we didn't notice it, she didn't tell us..she told her foster mother she "fell" out of bed. I told her that was impossible because of the height of the bed & the guardrail. I was called a liar in court .. but no one cared to come over to see the bed despite our numerous invitations (Robin has also said she's a cat & that she lived on the moon..this is what 5 year old children do).



This went on & on. This last hearing was a good hearing because

A new Guardian Ad Litem saw what Dean is truly like (she had Lisa alone when she told her what she did)..

my NEW therapist was on our side, after I had been through time & time again with the previous therapist. The previous therapist was more interested in getting some sort of confession out of me rather than deal with what my real issues were. This previous therapist was the reason CPS found out about my pregnancy with my son, & she leaked the information when I begged her not to tell anyone since it had nothing to do with the case. She broke my confidence, & when I confronted her, she claimed" They tricked me into telling them". I'm still tempted to go to her supervisor & getting her fired for breaking my trust.

The foster mother (who believes in us)vouching for us, & also the family therapy evaluator vouching for me & Lisa... the cons? well,

Dean INSISTS on being present in family therapy (which I will NOT let happen.. the evaluation says therapy for transition from their home to ours, to me that means it doesn't include him.. the court order says "when appropriate".

Lisa's therapist is ordered to give everything to the court that Lisa said to her in her therapy. Why does this worry me? Because Dean preps her before she goes in & the therapist likes him. & you know if you plant ideas in kids' heads, & keep at it, they're going to go with it, & she's been with him with no influence from me for 6 months. & also if you repeatedly ask kids leading questions, they're going to give you what you want to hear.

We have family therapy, but it s ALL the way down there... & w/ Robin's doc appts, parenting,therapy, & Mike's work, this should be FUN to schedule (NOT).. considering it's a 65 mile drive 1 way.

At least we get to see Lisa

We get supervised visitation again *rolling eyes* but who is it recommended by? Not by the evaluator that has observed me & Lisa together, but by .. who?? That's RIGHT!!Lisa's therapist...a woman who has never met any of us is going to recommned when visitation can start. So naturally I have the Guardian Ad Litem report, my therapists's reports, court orders, evaluator's reports, etc. & I'm going to be faxing 'em daily till something gets done (they're already kind of sick of me).. no way is she gonna tell us when we can & can't see my daughter when this therapist is in Dean's back pocket!!! I feel horrible and so helpless now that Dean is doing this to my daughter. It's like a cycle.. like my mother did to me growing up.. tried to get the "bad seed" of MY birthmother out of me.. now I see it happening with Lisa.....



so what do we have to do now?? seems since Dean has been found out & he doesn't look so saintly (THANK GOD) now I'm going to concentrate on being IN HIS FACE as much as possible... Robin is now starting overnights & weekends and the day before her sixth birthday on June 18th, if all goes well (as far as I'm concerned it will, doesn't seem to be in my hands though ), she will be HOME.. talk about the party of the century!!! & Mike & I will do whatever it takes to get Lisa away from that monster & get her home.. ok there it all is.. I know it sounds crazy but it's all true, & Mike has been objective seen it all The lack of justice here is SICK...he hates it, & is FURIOUS.. I mean Dean wouldn't even let Lisa participate in our WEDDING without even asking the court. *I still cry over that* We will re-do everything when Lisa comes home, no doubt about it (planning for Feb, I hear Lisa MAY be home by end of August (maybe).. anyway there it is...all the truth.. believe it or not... truth IS stranger than fiction.





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