Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who
dispenses advice to
people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she
said that, as an
observant orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an
abomination according to
Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any
circumstance.
The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned
by a US resident, Jim,
which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as
well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people
regarding God's Law. I have
learned a great deal from your show, and try to
share that knowledge with as
many people as I can. When someone tries to defend
the homosexual lifestyle,
for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus
18:22 clearly states it to
be an abomination. End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding
some of the other
specific laws and how to follow them.
-
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I
know it creates a
pleasing odor for the Lord-Lev.1:9. The problem is
my neighbors. They claim
the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite
them?
-
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as
sanctioned in Exodus
21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would
be a fair price for her?
-
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman
while she is in her
period of menstrual cleanliness-Lev.15:19-24. The
problem is, how do I tell?
I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
-
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess
slaves, both male and
female, provided they are purchased from neighboring
nations. A friend of
mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not
Canadians. Can you
clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
-
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the
Sabbath. Exodus 35:2
clearly states he should be put to death. Am I
morally obligated to kill him
myself?
-
A friend of mine feels that even though eating
shellfish is an
abomination-Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination
than homosexuality. I
don't agree. Can you settle this?
-
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the
altar of God if I have a
defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear
reading glasses. Does my
vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle
room here?
-
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed,
including the hair around
their temples, even though this is expressly
forbidden by Lev.19:27. How
should they die?
-
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of
a dead pig makes me
unclean, but may I still play football if I wear
gloves?
-
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by
planting two different
crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing
garments made of two
different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend).
He also tends to curse
and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we
go to all the trouble of
getting the whole town together to stone them?
Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we
just burn them to death at a private family affair
like we do with people
who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so
I am confident you can
help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's
word is eternal and
unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim.
(copied without permission from an email forwarded by a friend)