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January 4, 2001
School Answering Machine
Hello! You have reached the automated answering
service of your school.
In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff
member, please listen to all options before making a
selection:
- To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1
- To make excuses for why your child did not do his
work - Press 2
- To complain about what we do - Press 3
- To cuss out staff members - Press 4
- To ask why you didn't get needed information that was
already enclosed in your newsletter and several
bulletins mailed to you - Press 5
- If you want us to raise your child - Press 6
- If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit
someone - Press 7
- To request another teacher for the third time this
year - Press 8
- To complain about bus transportation - Press 9
- To complain about school lunches - Press 0
If you realize this is the real world and your child
must be accountable/responsible for his/her own
behavior, class work, homework, and that it's NOT the
teacher's fault for your child(ren)'s lack of effort -
HANG UP and HAVE A NICE DAY!!!