March 19, 1998 -- Wood-Eye and Harelip

March 19, 1998
Wood-Eye and Harelip

There was a boy who lost his left eye in an accident. I think he shot it out with a BB gun. His parents were too poor to buy him a glass eye but found a doctor who could provide a wooden eye that was affordable. The wood eye looked less than realistic and the boy was very self-conscious about it and consequently didn't socialize much. The big school dance was coming up and his friends asked if he planned to attend. He said, "No I don't think so. I would be too embarrassed because of my wooden eye."

They finally reassured him that no one would pay any attention to his eye and convinced him to go to the dance. At the dance he remained off to the side, afraid to confront any of the girls and ask them to dance. His friends kept encouraging him but he would say, "I don't know what she would think about my wooden eye." After a while his friends noticed a girl across the room who was also shyly standing off to the side. Looking closer they noticed that she wasn't unattractive but did have a serious harelip.

They went to their friend and said "Look! There is a girl across the room with a harelip. She is obviously just as self conscious as you are and certainly won't be offended by your wooden eye. Go ask her to dance." After some apprehension he finally worked up his courage and took the long walk across the dance floor and approached the hare-lipped girl.

He said, "Would you like to dance with me?"
The girl excitedly replied, "Would I? Would I?"
The boy immediately screamed back, "Harelip! Harelip!"

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