MTB Ranting

How to Suck Gracefully

"My name is Mark, and I suck." This is how the introduction goes at a meeting of SA (suckaholics anonymous). I've been going to those meetings more regularly in the last 10 months or so, and learning to cope with sucking. Some of you who've raced against me, or ridden with me, may be saying "Holy hoptoad, Batman, if he sucks, I must really suck!" Others who know me are probably saying "That's right, you do suck. In fact, you suck all the way. You're a shimmering paragon of eternal suck, and I could drop you with a beer in one hand." This is normal, and due to the fact that except for Cadel Evans and Miguel Martinez, everyone on earth sucks. Tinker sucks. Jason Moeschler (local pro hammer) sucks. Everyone except the guys at the very top suck.

The bad part for me, is that I seem to suck a little bit more this year. Last year I was pretty pleased with my riding in the spring. I won some cash, had some good finishes, even stood on the podium at the Big Bear NCS (at least i woulda stood there in the 5th place spot, except i left early to meet friends and drink beer). For a few weeks I had almost convinced myself that I didn't suck.

This spring has been a little different. Instead of constantly riding at the front, I'm struggling to break into the top 10 (in Vet class, fer chrissakes!). Luckily, I have some excuses (switch to roadie mode here): Not enough time to train, no riding partners, stress from moving and new job, buncha fast guys turned 35, tougher competition in the bay area, blah blah blah...

Beyond the  Excuses

Luckily for you, this isn't about why I suck, because I'm starting to discover that it doesn't really matter. I'm beginning to develop a new attitude about racing, sucking and everything. Oh, don't worry. I'm not one of these clowns that doesn't want to play unless he can win. I'm still taking racing seriously. But I'm probably having even more fun, and here's why.

Less Race, More Ride

In the last couple years, from the middle of March through September, I raced just about every weekend, plus on tuesday nights during the week. This means lots of traveling, lots of entry fees, lots of prizes, but not so much epic backcountry adventure. I'm not 100% sure how I got into that rut, but I suspect it was connected with turning 35, and suddenly being one of the big honches in my class at the races. I was one of the favorites in just about every NorCal race (in vet expert) because I left all the really fast guys behind when I got old. So I started thinking about racing to win, and going to all the races in a series so I could do well in the series. That meant I had to do some incredibly stupid and suck-filled races, like that Antioch Knobular (can you say fire-road and pavement?) On the other hand, travel wasn't all bad, because I lived in Sacramento, so anything that took me away from there was OK, unless it took me to Antioch.

These days, I'm only racing once or twice a month, and I'm picking out the real peaches on the circuit, as well as the local neighborhood races, like the Napa Dirt Classic, and Boggs. I'll still be traveling some, like to the mother of all races (Lemurian), the LaGrange Classic in Weaverville, the Leadville 100 and probably the Coyote Classic in Downieville, but now I have 2-3 weekends a month where I can just get on my bike and spend all day riding and whooping it up. While racing is fun, especially on some of the great courses we have in NorCal, there's nothing like going exploring for the day and discovering new trails.

Different Expectations, More Competition

While it's true I'm getting whupped on alot, I seem to be riding with, and competing against, more guys. The last couple years it seemed like it was mostly just me and Marty Cunningham, and if anyone else was near us, it meant I was having a disaster. Now there's 5-10 guys within a couple minutes at the finish. Unfortunately, several of them seem to be passing me in the last part of the race, but that'll change. At Boggs, there was only a 6 minute spread from 3rd to 16th. That gives me more to think about than just keying on one or two other fast guys. Furthermore, since we're not at the front with Rex and George, we're not racing for blood, so it's a little friendlier rivalry. At Napa and at Boggs, I was duking it out the whole way with Olaf Beckman and a couple others, and it was really, really fun.

See, racing is about alot more than just winning. All it means when you win, is that you finally sandbagged hard enough that there were no fast guys in your class. Racing means doing a little better than last time against the guys that normally ride close to you. When I finally hang on and beat Olaf, I'll probably still be nowhere near the front, but it will be a triumphant feeling anyway.

Ultra-Endurance

One of the great things about getting older is you also get stupider. You also tend to get married. Both of these conditions increase your tolerance to pain and suffering. This gives us vet class racers a bit of an advantage in ultra-endurance events. Even though I'm slow, I can stay on my bike for a long-ass time. How long? Who knows? That's part of what ultras are all about, finding (and surpassing) your own limits. This year I'm going to try to do it for 24 hours at Laguna Seca. Hopefully I'll see some of you there.

As a side-effect to my interest in Ultras, I now have more inspiration to do all-day epic backcountry rides. It's not just play anymore. Now I can call it training.

Don't be an Enabler

So now that I've come to grips with sucking, I can take steps to cope. If you're one of the lucky few who can clearly recognize your own suckulousness, congratulations. By following my 12-step program (ride, ride, ride, ride, ride, ride, ride, ride, ride, eat, sleep, ride) , you can have a rewarding life anyway. Be aware of codependence with others who have yet to admit that they suck. You owe it to your friends to look them in the eye and say "Dude, you suck. Let's ride."
 


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