Things I Hate. I hate Ed from all the Vacation movies, especially when he says "I don't know if the cat likes it, but it's gooo-ooood". That just makes me want to kill him. I honestly have to leave the room. I hate people who don't like Monty Python because they don't get it. I hate people who argue with me about anything, especially when I'm right. I hate when this chick that you like starts to like you, and she tells her friends, so they tell your friends, so they tell you and you say "it's a bad time, with prom coming up and all, I don't want to go to prom" and then later your telling another friend, so somebody listens to your conversation, and she tells the chick that you liked that I don't want to go to prom with her, so her friend tells me "Michelle doesn't want to go to prom with you!!!" so you feel like you broke up and it's only one day after you found out, and you were on a field trip the hole day, so you just ignore it and hope it goes away, so the chick you liked doesn't even look at you for like three weeks. I hate when you driving home from and indoor soccer game with 3 friends in the car and you see this woman and yell "show us your tits" and then she gets behind you and wrights down your lisence plate number and calls the police so they pull you over and make you look like a jackass in front of your friends and ask the guy you yelled it to fess up, but nobody is going to fess up, because they're sissies, so he threatens to wright you two seatbelt tickets because mine is on wrong, and Jon is real smooth when he puts his on when the cop is right behind us, so Jon finally says "I did it, sir" and the cop says "why'd you lie to me? why don't you step behind the car?". I hate when two years ago you had an awesome computer, but now it's steam-driven, and your friends want you to play starcraft, but you say "no thanks, I'll play Doom 2". I hate when this kid at school you call pussyhead throws a milk at you, but it doesn't bust, so you pick it up and wing it at him, and it hits him, but sprays all over your other friend that you weren't even mad at. It was chocolate milk. I hate when there is a person in a class that gets made fun of so much that the teacher says "if anybody else makes fun of Donna anymore, they're going to the office". I hate it when you loan somebody money and a year later they get a job and they still won't pay you back. I hate it when you and your friend are making fun of each other, not seriously, just for fun, so he says something, so you say something, so he says something, so finally you bring up his ex-girlfriend and say "Yeah, Bree, she was a virgin!" and Mrs. Huttsell says "Chris, why don't you stay after class". I hate it when your walking to your refrigerator at night, and you about break your toe on a coffee table. I hate when people say "oung-yun" instead of onion, that really pisses me off, because I'm from Indiana and half of Indiana is rather hick-ish. I hate it when you meet somebody on the mud and they seem to talk with a funny accent so you say "where are you from? Sweden? Quebec?" and he says "Iowa". I hate work. I hate work especially when you have a manager you don't get along with very well, and he is trying to be funny, so he says "Chris, does your mother love you?" so I say "Not nearly as much as your mother does." and then he's pissed the rest of the night. I hate when after the whole "I don't want to go to prom" episode your trying to find the chicks number and apparently she doesn't exist so your going to your last resort and your last resorts sister answers his Email and starts to spread rumours so you Email her like "what the fxck do you think your doing you stupid bxtch" and so she Emails you and says "don't yell at me 'little junior'" so I Email her and say "If I'm a 'little junior' are you a 'fat senior'" and then she get's pissed off.
Things I hate so much you wouldn't belive how much I hate them: I hate when you have something you really hate to put on your webpage, and when you get there, you can't remember what it was. I hate when you are sitting in your chemistry class listening to Mr. Shukla talk and you didn't do you homework so your really hopeing he doesn't call on you but he does, so you say "I got the same thing she got" trying to weasel out of it, but he sees right through your little ploy and says "and what is that?" so you look foolish and say "Never mind, I didn't do it, I'm lazy." I hate it when it's 3 days before spring break and Mr. Shukla gives you a big assed assignment because he's going back to India to start his spring break early so you think "hell, I've got the whole spring break to do it" but you don't do it in class those 3 days, and your sure as hell not going to bring it home, so now your wondering what your going to tell him when he says "Chris, what did you get" because he always calls on you first and your pretty sure you don't want to say "I got what she got". I hate when the mud server goes down and your sick from work and you are about hobbited out because he won't tell you what the hell is going on with Sam and Frodo, but apparently the guys at the mud server don't give a damn about how you don't have a life so they're in no hurry to fix it. I hate it when your watching the VH1 top 100 artists of all time, and the Jackson 5 are in it, and so is that guy that plays the piano and says "woo-ooo-ooo" alot. You know, that guys that says "tudi fruty on rudy" or some crap. I hate it when you have a bunch of friends over to watch Wrestle Mania and most of them don't pay you, so you don't have any money a whole week of spring vacation. I hate it when people are suprised when I say "I'd do Chyna" from DX. I hate it when teachers get on my case because they keep saying I'm smart and I'm wasting it. I hate when you get fired from Hardee's for being sick over the weekend and calling in both days. I hate when you might have a chance to hook up with a chick from Brazil (foreign exchange student) and you might have to go to Prom with her. I've been doing all I can to get out of going to Prom, because I am against Prom. Prom is very chick-oriented. I don't dig it. I'm a revolutionist, you could say. Anyhow, I really dig this Brazilian chick (her name is Renada. Pronounced hey-NADA. Just like Royce Gracie) but if I have to go to Prom, I'm gonna be pissed.
Things I hate because it's the end of school, or things just suck. I hate when you finally get to see a movie that has been blown up by your friends (Boogie Nights) only to have it suck. It was a little bit funny, but nothing like I expected. I hate when your taking finals and you find yourself using the 'just guess "c"' method. More than is healthy. Like 10 c's in a row. I hate when you go to school on the last day, and your cleaning out your locker, then you get to History and remember that a 90 point assignment was in a notebook you threw away. Good time to remember that. I hate when the teachers lock the bathrooms in your school so people can't fill waterbaloons. I think that is against the law somehow. I hate when you fill up a waterbaloon only to have it bounce harmlessly off of the celing (sp) without popping. I hate when you take the first day of your Chemsitry test (using mostly the 'just pick "c"' method) and the second day you mean to study what you didn't know, so you 'just pick "c"' alot more than you would like. I hate when you see someone in a car and you think you know them, so you flip them off, only to find that you do not, in fact, know them and they try to start a fight with you. I hate when chicks tell secrets about you when your sitting right there (a girl whose name isn't to be mentioned). I hate to ride the bus to school when I'm a junior. I hate to be an incredible loser. Get this: (This is one of the things I've hated most in the last couple of weeks) This chick, she's an attractive girl. I'd sleep with her *shrug*. Anyhow, she's been attatched to this guy for a year or so. (as I understand it) This guy has been telling her how fat and ugly she is, so she won't realize that she's WAY too good for him, and leave him. They break up. She still runs back to him all the time because she doesn't realize that he's nothing good for her. I just don't get it. I hate it. I hate trying to catch ants. It's harder than you think to get any number of ants to be in any one place long enough to put them into an antfarm. I hate when my CD ROM drive breaks. I hate that I need a car. I hate the fact that I'll have to work alot this summer, and the chances of me getting a cool job (like one in construction) where you can just work, instead of smiling all the time and giving food to people, are slim. I hate being silenced on the MUD for talking about how the Pacers got SLAPPED by the Bulls last night. I hate when everyone complains when Michael Jordan pushes a little, but when Reggie Miller pulls out the 'Shoulder charge, get open for a three' move it's ok. I hate being so damn lazy. I hate having a cold in summer. I hate work. I hate when some 'Puff I'm a Homo Daddy' covers casmere (sp) by Led Zepplin. Everyone seems to like it. The dumb faggot keeps saying 'Come wit me' like some homo that doesn't know how to talk. I hate that. I hate when I have weird dreams about a friend's sister. (see below). I hate when some punk kid thinks he's going to 'Email Bomb' me. Like it's going to hurt my computer. What a homo. All it will suceed in doing is getting him kicked off the internet, and it will slow down the server for a couple of days. Woopy shit.
New things that I hate. I hate when I get grounded for wanting a computer. That's right, wanting a computer. The conversation went as follows:
Me: I'm glad we're getting a new car because now I can buy a computer.
Dad: Your mother and I decided you shouldn't get a computer.
Me: Then why did you tell me I could get a computer a couple days ago?
Dad: I don't know.
Me: Well, I'm not going to let you lie to me.
Dad: I won't have you calling me a lier!!!
Me: So, you admit that you lied, but you are mad that I called you a lier?
Dad: Shut up, just shut your mouth.
Me: ...
Dad: You know, you were going to get your mom's old car, but now your not!
Me: Ok (He was mad that that didn't piss me off, so he goes further)
Dad: And you can't drive anywhere.
Me: Fine.
Dad: And you can't drive to work anymore! (He was really pissed that I wasn't mad, so he was trying to make me mad)
Me: *laughter*
That was pretty much the end of it. I got grounded for two weeks, and then he said something like 'you can use the car again'. Kind of short lived. I hate all the nepotism at McDonalds. It's insane. Seems like everyone there is related. I especially hate this old chick who is like 'proud to be an employee' she's like: "I work at McDonalds AND KFC" like she is a brain sergion AND a mathemetician. Stupid ass. I hate when you happen to lock your keys in your car at Ozzfest (Don't do that). I hate it even more when it takes the 'locksmith' (really just a guy getting paid to break into peoples cars, who seems to be a little too good at what he does) an hour to help us. I especailly hate it when you can barely open your mouth without someone saying 'don't forget your keys' or something equally funny. Ever made yourself sick on a big fat cigar? I have. I hated it. I went into this cigar shop in Circle Center Mall and bought a $20 cigar, and a $7 cigar. I smoked the $7 cigar in under an hour. Bad idea. I got sick all over Steak and Shake's parking lot. The conversation was as follows:
Me: *open door* *heave*... *Heave*... *HEAVE*...
Mike: How ya doin?
Me: *heave*...
Mike: That good, huh?
Me: *Heave*... *spit*... feelin' good... *spit*
Now I'm looking into Pipes.
New things I hate! I hate all this Clinton hoopla. That's right, hoopla. I hate all this new shit music that is coming out. No one is trying to sound different, and whenever someone comes out with some descent metal, they put one good song on the album and the rest is "Type O Negative" shit. I hate losing a soccer game in the last 30 seconds of the match. Fuck me, man, we should have tied. I hate when you make a friend a bet that you can get this girl naked in your house by the end of the day, and he is very unconvinced, so he takes the bet, so I'm like "yeah, easy dollar" (we bet a dollar BTW) I could have done it too, but the bet was forfiet because she cut her head on something and I didn't end up giving her a ride home. I was in the BAG, man, easy. Your talking about disappointment. I was so pissed off that I didn't even call this other girl (who's name would not be safe to mention at this point in time due to the fact that I could lose insane amounts of hand) to ask her out Saturday night, instead I call this chick that I've had her number for a couple weeks and she turns out to be someone that I would much rather avoid than talk to. I was wondering "Who do you know from Monrovia?" she then shot my hopes and dreams out of the water with an answer like "Chris Jones, Donald Byrd, and Travis Hall." You don't understand the caliber of limp that I was. Limp is finite, and I was far past that. The people she named are people that I could do without to say the least. That SUCKED. Well, delving into the past (seeing as how I've not updated this page for a couple months) I hate getting sunburned badly. It wasn't just badly, it was aweful. I got tickets to the Brickyard 400, so I took Adam Weiss (if I go to a racing event, he's the one I take. Always.) and we're there and thinking "off the shirts" That was a silly decision. I was so sunburned it wasn't even funny. It was so bad that the top layer of my skin was dead so when I went to soccer practice the next day all my sweat stayed under my dead skin so it looked like I was from another planet or something. If you go to the Brickyard and you decide to take off your shirt (females aside) only do it for a little while. Don't do it for 6 hours. I should kick my own ass for that one. Guess what else I hate. Go ahead. You won't guess it. I hate when I'm leaving from Blimpy, drinking my Surge, and I look at the lids but think "I'll be allright" of coarse, when I sit down, and put my Surge in my cupholder I even said "I should have got a lid" then I pull out and spill the surge all over my crotch. Let me tell you, it was a regular riot for Jon, Derek and the lot, but for me it sucked. I had to go see "Deadman on Campus" with Surge-soaked underwear. I hate when you accidently steal 10 dollars in gas. After Deadman on Campus, I stop to get gas and I'm talking to Cooper. Mike comes out and is like "They don't have any condomns in there (the gas station) so I was like "Don't lie" and he was like "really" so we go in there, my intent was to proove him wrong, but try as I might I could not find any condomns either. In any case we can't find any condomn's so we leave. I get home and I'm thinking "How can I have this much money?" then it dawned on me that I forgot to pay for the gas. I really feel like a bastard, but I've not gone back to Avon, so I've not had a chance to pay it back. I think I spelled condomns wrong through that whole thing but I'm too damn tired to give a damn.
It's time for another hate list! I hate people. I just can't stand people. I must make it clear that I do not consider 'people' as 'the human race' I mean 'people' as in 'all those idiots I don't talk to' which could very well be exchanged with 'the human race' on most occasions. It's just that they're so damn stupid. I hate when the Indoor Soccer team I'm on is just playing for fun, and some team thinks they're accomplishing a great deal by beating us. I mean, we're just messing around and they think they're great. It makes me almost try, and I'll be damned if I try. I hate when I rip my favorite pair of jeans. I mean, you only have one favorite pair of jeans, right? A favorite pair of jeans is more important than love or money, as far as I'm concerned. I'm at an Indoor game, and a bunch of people are juggling, so I join the circle to juggle. After a bit I decide that I still have pants on, so I begin to take them off. I wear my jeans pretty large, I can take them off without taking off my shoes, and I'm wearing shorts underneath, so I have my pants around my ancles and the ball comes to me. Out of habit, I kick at it, only to hear a large rip. Damn, Damn, Damn, and damn again. My favorite pair of jeans. Damn. Now I sewed them up, so I guess their allright. I could be a seamstress. Well, I don't know about that, but you know those things you put on your fingers so you don't impale yourself with a needle? Thimbles? Well, I didn't use one of those. Kind of regreted that. I hate that, even if I explain myself to people, they still don't understand me. I am therefore making a page called "the rules I live by" to give you all a peak at the mentality that is me. I think you can dig it. I hate that I get like 8 hours sleep on the weekends. I get home about 1 am every friday, just home from messing around, I wake up at 5 to go to work, I get home from work, go mess around, go to a soccer game, usualy at 11 pm, get home about 1 am, and go to work at 5 am the next morning. It kind of sucks, but at least I have satruday nights off.
I HATE! That's all. I just hate. What I hate more though, is the fact that I updated my page with a very specific hate in mind, and now it escapes me. I hate that I should be studying for my pre-calc final right now, but instead I've put it off for two hours, and I think we all know that I'll not be losing any sleep over homework. I hate it when a small family of star fish explode all over my wall. Ok, that's never happend, but I'm trying to get the ball rolling, here. Sue me. I hate this new Metallica cover of Bob Segar. I'm not overly fond of Metallica, and I can't stand Bob Segar. If that hadn't come on the radio, I don't know what I'd be hating. I hate that I suck at bowling. I mean bad. If I had to bowl for a living, I'd starve. Have I ever mentioned that I hate bugs? Man, I can't stand them. No respect, those bugs. I hate when your parents don't think before they speak. I hate it even more when I decide to make them feel foolish, so that just hightens the fury on their part, and they refuse to reason. DOWN WITH LOGIC! I hate the fact that it is likely that I'll fail art. Yes, art. It may be because the teacher doesn't like me, or it may be because I was sick a great deal, or it could be because I lost a puppy that was close to my heart and lacked inspiration to do any assignments, but it's probly because I didn't do an assignment that encompassed over 5 weeks, because the first 3 aren't true. I hate that, even though I like the teacher, I can't bring myself to do math homework. I can't bring myself to do homework at all. As a matter of fact, If I don't study for my pre-calc final, I will fail, and that's not really very motivating. Today, I finished the book I was reading about 7 and then called people at random until 9-something when Jen had to get off the phone, and even then I didn't study. What I did was update my webpage. Man, I suck. I hate the fact that I'll probly have to move out of my house after I graduate. I was going to live here over the summer before I went into the navy, but apparently my father took some tough-pills or something and was really looking for an arguement, and I think I got the ass end of that deal. What else do I hate? Remember that whole "ignore it and it will go away" deal that I had working for a while? Big pile of shit, that was. I hate it. It doesn't even remotely work, and now my friends have decided to employ it, and refuse to take my advice that it doesn't help anything. I hate the fact that I'm wearing a shirt with a hole in it from "Fourth of July at the Criswell household" Basically the one day it's ok to play with fire. Good idea. Blah, Blah, Blah.
Hate is such a strong word... that it describes how I feel perfectly. I hate when you're getting ready to take a shower, and you can't get the radio station you want to tune in. There is very little I hate more than not being able to listen to the X when I'm in the shower. Further, I hate when you get into the shower, and immediately the radio goes to commercial. Man, I hate that. I don't care if it's been said, but I hate people. I hate when noone answers my Emails. Damn them! It's not as if I have a life, and they're thinking: He probly doesn't read them anyway. It's well known that I don't have a life, so they know I check my email every day. bastards. I hate men a lot more than I hate women, I've come to realize. Men must be the most odd creatures on earth, to women. They really think when they lie out their asses, that it impresses others. Odd, that is. I hate when people lie about me, and I hate it when people lie about those I associate myself with. I hate that I have to disreguard 90% of everything Jon says. See, Jon is one of those people that are very impressionable. He can like something more than life itself one day, and then be adamant in the opposit direction the next. He's an odd creature, himself. I hate how broke I am. I hate giving someone advice, whom I know very little. I think it's one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It really made me nervous, but it had to be done. I hate that I have very little to do over this christmas break. I havn’t even made a christmas list yet. That’s ok, I have 4 days. I hate how gay this whole “Donald” situation has gone. I really wish that I could get into a mood where I’m like “fuck it all” and see him somewhere so I could kick the living hell out of him. But if I fought him, that would be a sign of weakness, and I’d be pissed off at myself. The guy really needs friends, but he’s such an incredible loser, that he can’t seem to find any, and he’s really starting to piss me off. I just know that he’s going to say something to me, all his ‘friends’ are going to point and laugh at him (again) and it’s going to escelate from there. Oh, well, time will tell. I hate when I'm updateing my webpage, and something goes wrong, and I have to wait 4 hours before I can finish updating it. That sucked. I hate that neither of the libraries around here carry "The Innocents Abroad" by Mark Twain. I'm really looking forward to reading it again. I also hate that I can't find any books about Isaac Newton. I think the guy was cool, but all the books I'm finding are for little kids. Let's show some respect, shall we? I mean, the guy did invent the cat-door. Pure genius.
Things I Hate, because school starts tomorrow. I hate when I get snowed in my house. I like snow, but it has it's limits. There isn't a great deal to do around the house, quite honestly. I don't have any game systems, and I don't watch TV very much, so I just read. I hate when you take a drink of something, and you choke on it and cough and such. I feel like such an ass when I do that. Even if noone is around, I feel embarassed. Like 18 years isn't enough time to fully understand the fundamentals of the fine art of drinking, you know? UGH! That's how I feel. It's been such a wasted weekend because I've been stuck at home the whole weekend. My soccer game was cancelled, I couldn't make it to work, and I was bored out of my mind. I hate that I'll have to ride the bus to school tomorrow. I don't even know when the bus comes by my house. I'll have to wait down there and freeze my balls off waiting to be humiliated. I hate that my car got a flat tire, then it snowed a whole bunch, so I've got to wait for my dad to take it somewhere to get new tires, and now I'll have to ride the bus for a while. Jeeze, that sucks bad. I hate when I'm so bored on a Sunday (because I'm snowed in, and have been for 2 days already) that I decide I should call everyone I know. I literally spent 5 hours on the phone. Do you have any idea how much it sucks to spend 5 hours on the phone?!? If I could have found a blunt object, I'd have blugeouned myself with it repeatedly. I think I spelled blugeouned wrong. I'm sure of it, as a matter of fact. I hate that I havn't been able to go shopping since Christmas. I put it off for a long time, then it snowed way too much, so now I'll just have to wait longer. I'm going to hate going back to school tomorrow. I'll have to wake up at the ass crack of dawn, go to school, learn nothing, accomplish nothing, probly not even laugh very much, and then come home. What a wasted day. And I think we all know, that I hate people.
I think it's pretty well known that I hate. I hate a lot of things, just generally. I hate the fact that noone emails me regularly. I hate when I'm sick from school. Even going to school is better than being sick. I hate the fact that there isn't a movie that I would put in my top five favorite movies that isn't directed by Quentin Tarrantino. The man is a movie god. I hate math. A lot. Can't stand it. It's not that I don't like it so much, it's just that I'm too damned lazy to do it. I hate when girls parents don't like me. They don't even give me a chance. I think that if any parents got to know me they'd count their blessing just because they would know I'm not going to sleep with their daughter, but that isn't the case. They see me, and they think "bastard." Immediately. I just don't get it. I think I'm just going to start wearing a shirt with my webpage address on it, so people can read my rules, and stay the hell away from me. I'm not sure I like much of anything. I hate when I can't get ahold of the indoor soccer place, so I can't find out if I can get a team togeather for second session, so I can't give my friends an answer as to wether we're going to have a team or not. I'm sure I'm running out of time. I hate TV. There is never anything good on. I only know of three shows that I like. I like Pop Up Video, Win Ben Stein's Money, and Talk Soup. Everything else is shit. I hate when you get home from school and make some plans. Your plans are: Go eat at Zydeco's, then go kiss a pretty girl. Those seem like reasonable plans, do they not? Well, right before I leave the girl calls and says "sorry, my dad says you can't come over tonight" so I'm like "no problem, that's cool" when really I'm like "damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, and damn again!" so I'm pretty much hanging on eating at Zydeco's to bring me out of my horrendous loss of not kissing a pretty girl. Only, I go to pick up Cooper, because he's to eat at Zydeco's with me, and as I drive by Zydeco's is closed. What the hell? What have I done? Zydeco's is closed on mondays!?!? What is wrong with you people!?! If I could have found a building big enough that I would have been able to jump off of, I would have, but I figured I'd just sprain my ancle and be like "damn, that hurt, why the hell did I do that. Damn." Then Cooper and I go to Martinsville to China Buffet, which sucks, and my whole day is a waste. The only thing that got me through school that day was thinking that I could eat at Zydeco's, and then within 10 minutes I find out that I'm not going to kiss anyone, and I'm not going to eat at Zydeco's. Screw me. I hate clingy people. You clingy people suck. I think you know whom I'm speaking of. Those of you who should be going out with a lot of people, having fun, instead your attatched to the same person for half a year, and now you are far too attatched to that person to break it off even if your not happy. You're the kind of people that want to "make it work" rather than find someone with whom it works without having to be made. I don't get it. I hate people.