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Headbangers vs Marc Mero and Goldust
A strong crowd involvement (mainly due to
Sable’s presence), coupled with some reasonable early action, succeeded in renewing my interest.
Sable, however, was sent to the back, as there was ‘only room for one beautiful woman at ringside’.
Luna stayed, Sable went. And that was that. Bye bye crowd heat.
With just five and a half minutes on the clock, Goldust dropped Thrasher head-first on the ring steps,
busting his head in the process. In what didn’t appear to be blading, Thrasher’s head resembled
Steve Austin at WrestleMania XIV. With the addition of blood, the match became more intense and
Thrasher was pummeled all over the show for the better part of six minutes, until maneuvering out of
a TKO and landing a DDT.
Mero tagged ‘Dust, Thrasher tagged Mosh, and The Headbangers gained the advantage, Until, that
is, Luna shoved Thrasher off the top rope. Down came a furious Sable, and tried to get at Luna.
Meanwhile, Mosh and Thrasher swapped over behind the referees back, and Mero was cradled for
a Headbangers win. After Sable and Luna were successfully split, Sable went bonkers again, and to
a huge pop, pushed ‘Marvelous’ Marc down to the canvas. Great stuff.
Taka Michinoku vs Pantera
An Owen Hart backstage interview was going well, but he mucked it up as usual. "Helmsley, when I
get in the ring, I’m gonna bust your legs!"
Sunny announced the two participants in the light heavyweight title match, and squashing all rumours
that Brian Christopher would be under Pantera’s mask, out strolled ‘Too Sexy’ and took his place
alongside Jim Ross and his daddy Jerry Lawler at ringside. Father and son, typically, were a riot.
Crowd heat was disappointing for this match, although the action was rather good. Excellent moves
such as Pantera’s plancha, and Taka’s springboard plancha all hit the mark, and unlike the vast
majority of WWF Mini matches, there were also some smooth exchanges, and at least a little in the
way of psychology.
Pantera utilised a hurracanrana from the ringpost to the apron to the floor, and followed it up with a
super tope through the buckles. He also used a tiger-backbreaker, a bow and arrow, a tope con
hilo and a walk-up moonsault which also landed. The crowd didn’t really give a damn about any of
this, which is not unexpected, as Pantera’s push is only three weeks old at the most. To wrap it up,
Taka nailed his Michinoku Driver for the three count. He then escaped Lawler and Lawler Jr.
Godwinns vs Quebecers
Pierre is one of the most
under-rated workers in the WWF, and Jacques is competent, despite his hideous bald patch, but
Henry and Phinnius are atrocious. the best move being Pierre’s
slingshot cannonball from the top rope, which the crowd didn’t pop for like they once did. Moments
later, Henry clotheslined Pierre and Phinnius covered him for the victory.
Jeff Jarrett vs Bradshaw
Justin/Blackjack Bradshaw is apparently now just called ‘Bradshaw’.
Bradshaw enjoyed several minutes dominating Jarrett, with his one-dimensional, but passable
offense until ‘Double J’ and Jim Cornette combined to chop the big man down. Eventually, this
painfully mediocre match was ended when Jarrett grabbed Cornette’s racket and waffled Bradshaw
causing himself to be disqualified and retain the NWA North American Heavyweight Title. Jarrett,
Windham, Cornette, Morton and Gibson then all kicked out of the faces until Hawk and
Animal made the save. Ahhh, just like old times.
Ken Shamrock, Ahmed Johnson, Chainz, Skull and Eight Ball vs Farooq, Rocky Maivia,
Mark Henry, D-Lo Brown and Kama Mustafa
After a backstage interview played host to another verbal disagreement between Rocky and
Farooq, it was time for the ‘War of Attrition’ match. Shamrock and D-Lo worked a sloppy minute
or two at the opening, but things got much worse when Kama and Chainz took centre stage. As if
that wasn’t bad enough, Mark Henry, entered the fray. Fortunately, he
decided to challenge Ahmed Johnson to a test of strength which at
least meant some heat. Johnson slammed the ‘Worlds strongest man’, but turned his back
on the Nation and found himself on the receiving end for a few minutes.
The first decent action of the match saw the best wrestlers on their respective teams, Rocky and
Shamrock locked up. Unfortunately, that didn’t last long either, and it wasn’t until thirteen minutes
has gone when the match picked up steam. All ten men brawled in the ring, and it all ended when
‘The Rock’ tapped out to Ken’s ankle lock. The closing moments were exciting.
The post-match arguing between The Nation was entertaining too, although I was hoping they would
split up, there and then. The WWF are sure dragging this one on a bit.
Kane vs Vader
Vader struck the moonsault and Kane got straight up from both that, and the powerbomb, and
struck a chokeslam, followed by a tombstone. 1-2-3. Vader couldn’t bring out any fire from this
extremely limited wrestler, let’s hope The Undertaker can, come March 29th.
After the match when Kane grabbed a wrench and clocked Vader over
the swede, apparently knocking him out in the process. Vader was stretchered out, and will be
taking some time off with the eye injury that he already had going into the match.
Steve Austin, Owen Hart, Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie vs Hunter Hearst Helmsley,
New Age Outlaws and ?
Who would the replacement for the irreplaceable Shawn Michaels be? Rumoured names were Sid,
Randy Savage, The Ultimate Warrior and King Kong Bundy, all of which were extremely unlikely.
Surely the WWF could pull something off though?
Savio Vega. Oh.
Vega isn’t a bad grappler.
The crowd impressed with Owen Hart, Cactus Jack, Chainsaw Charlie, and
especially Steve Austin, all of whom received strong ovations. Cactus and Chainsaw
were armed with a little skip filled with bin lids, chairs and other similar weapons.
‘Stonecold’ and BA opened the contest, but almost immediately, it became an eight man
brawl. This match was similar to the memorable ‘Chicago Streetfight’ at WrestleMania
13, but it was better. It was a foreign object-fest that took place inside and outside the ring, and
solid crowd heat was maintained throughout.
Highlights included … Billy Gunn slamming the steel steps on Cactus Jack … Savio Vega
wrapping Cactus up in barbed wire … And Steve Austin exploding on the opposition at the end and then stunning The Road
Dog for the pin.
Afterwards, Chyna got in Austin’s face. ‘Stonecold’ tried to walk away but Chyna was having none
of it, and flipped Austin the fingers. Austin stunned Chyna and ended the show with another huge
ovation.