Leather strap matches, Indian Strap Matches, Texas Bull Rope matches, Russian Chain matches, and Dog Collar matches are all the same. The premise is the same, and the means of victory is the same. Two individuals are strapped together, usually because on e combatant has been running from the other during their previous matches. These two wrestlers do battle while strapped together, and the winner is the first individual who can drag his opponent around the ring and touch all four corner posts. The restraint device that binds the two athletes together is often used as an additional weapon during the match. These matches have been taking place since the days that Dusty Rhodes and Wahoo McDaniel were in their primes.This past Monday's Raw featured a Bhrama Bull Rope Match between Al Snow and The Rock. This match is supposed to be a specialty of The Rock, and he is supposed to unbeatable in them, but somehow he seems to keep winning them by pinfall. Since when does a pinfall, or a submission for that matter, decide a strap match of any kind.
This type of ending can only happen in the World Wrestling Federation. Remember that this is the organization that told us that the way to win a cage match is by escaping the cage. Isn't the cage supposed to keep the combatants together as well as interference out? Not the original WWF cages, with openings between their bars so wide, that a human head could fit through comfortably. These cages were also open at the top, so if your foreign object of choice wouldn't fit between the bars (and only a steel chair fits into this category), then you could just throw it over the top.
These are the same guys who conduct three-way or four-way matches where the winner doesn't have to defeat the champion to become champion, and the champion doesn't have to be defeated to lose his title. If you are going to steal an idea from ECW, then at least steal the rules as well. In a real Three-Way Dance, the winner is the last man standing, after all of the other combatants have been pinned or have submitted.
Gimmick matches are exciting, and are actually, at times, better than pure wrestling matches. But if the rules are softened, then they are pointless, wastes of time. One wonders, if Al Snow would have won the match anyway without the help of Degeneration X, but would he have been able to drag the 265 pound Rock around to touch all four corners without The Rock having something to say about it? I doubt it, but it would have been interesting to find out. Thanks a lot WWF, for ruining a perfectly good gimmick.
In the October 15, 1999 issue, I detailed my choices for the PWI Year End Awards. I knew that since wrestling fans chose the awards, and not by people involved in the sport, the choices would be a little strange, and they were. This week, we review my selections, and compare them to the actual choices.COMEBACK OF THE YEAR
PWI'S CHOICE: EDDIE GUERRERO
MY CHOICE: HARLEM HEAT (NOT LISTED AMONG VOTE GETTERS)I apologize for this selection. While it is true that the Harlem Heat got back together and were able to dominate the tag team ranks in WCW, Eddie Guerrero shouldn't even be alive. He was involved in a serious automobile accident, and at the very least, his wrestling career should have been over. But Eddie, warrior that he is, refused to let it end this way, and fought with all he had to return and continue running the family business. Eddie could actually have won the above award Inspirational Wrestler of the Year) as well, because there are many who give up when the going gets tough. Believe me, I know from when I speak, as I have had to endure a pretty rough last two years, the only bright light in my life being wrestling, this newsletter, and my readers. I have fully recovered from my issues, and people like Eddie Guerrero continue to show that as long as you are alive, you have a chance. If I had it to do over again, I would have at least given Eddie this award.
Memo to Tony Schiavone: Professional wrestling has gone well beyond the days when announcers were instructed to ignore the history of the sport outside of their own federation.Thursday, December 30, 1999, Schiavone was commenting on the challenge issued by Chris Benoit towards Jeff Jarrett for a best out of three match series at WCW Souled Out on January 16, 1999. Schiavone mentioned that this would be the first time that a wrestler would wrestle three times on the same card. I won't comment on the fact that multiple television shows are recorded on the same day, and often times, wrestlers are asked to compete on all of the shows, thereby wrestling multiple times on the same day. I won't comment on this, because that would be too easy.
Schiavone didn't, probably because he couldn't, mention the original format of the WWF's King of the Ring tournament. From 1993 through 1995, the eventual KOR champion had to wrestle three matches on the same day in order to be successful. In 1995, Savio Vega had to defeat Mike Rotundo (IRS) in order to qualify to replace an injured Razor Ramon. After defeating Rotundo, Vega would go all the way to the finals before losing to eventual KOR champion, Mabel. Unless my math is faulty, that would be FOUR matches in the same day. But that may not be what Schiavone meant.
Tony may have been meaning to ignore Starcade of 1991. In 1991, Starcade was the site for "The Lethal Lottery". In this format, tag partners were drawn at random (more on that later), these teams had to win a tag match in order to qualify for "Battle Bowl". Once in "Battle Bowl", the wrestlers had to compete in what amounted to a 20-man battle royal, with the method of elimination being throwing a man from one ring into an adjacent ring. Once inside the second ring, over the top rope to the floor was the way wrestlers were eliminated, leaving the winners of the two rings to compete in a battle royal style match for the "Battle Bowl" crown. Sting teamed with Abdullah the Butcher to defeat Brian Pillman and Bobby Eaton and qualify for the battle royal. He was eliminated from the first ring, but was victorious in the second, which earned him an encounter with Lex Luger for the overall title. Sting threw Luger over the top rope, and became "Battle Bowl" champion for 1991. A tag match, two battle royals, then a singles match, wouldn't that also be four matches on the same card? I guess not, maybe I should ask Schiavone, seeing as how this did take place in WCW.
If Tony doesn't want to remember any of these events, then maybe he can remember the classic feud between Cactus Jack and the late Eddie Gilbert. These two men battled in some of the most dangerous matches ever conceived, but their feud reached its zenith on August 31, 1991. On this date, in Philadelphia, Cactus and Gilbert competed in a 2-out-of-three match series which consisted of a Falls Count Anywhere Match, a Stretcher Match, and was concluded by a Cage Match. These three matches were all fought on August 31, 1991, with Cactus winning the first match, Gilbert winning the stretcher match, and a double DQ in the cage match. Maybe Schiavone doesn't even know that these matches took place, because they were contested under the banner of Tri-State Wrestling. Maybe this event doesn't qualify, even though both wrestlers wrestled each other three times.
If Tony Schiavone wants to rewrite history, I can't stop him. All I can do is make sure that the facts are accurate for anyone who cares to know the truth.
Memo to Tony Schiavone: Today's wrestling fans are a lot smarter than you care to give them credit for.
The UPN Network is advertising its newest phenomenon; a show entitled "I Dare You - The Ultimate Stunt Challenge". This show will feature stuntmen trying to be more daring than the last one another. Every stunt will be more death defying than the last one. The advertisements also mention that each stunt will come with a dare, and the dares will be for a grander stunt than the previous stunt.I mention this because I am concerned about these stuntmen. There may as well be a show entitled "Let's See who Will Die First", because this is where television, reality shows are headed. This, unfortunately, is where professional wrestling is heading.
ECW's Spike Dudley has a new gimmick. His gimmick surrounds the fact that he takes more, and takes more severe bumps than any other wrestler in the business, and he hasn't missed a show in 2 years. While this is an admirable achievement, it is also a foolhardy accomplishment. The severe bumps are a part of the game, but if a wrestler needs some time off, then he should take some time off. Spike Dudley is at the top of my list of wrestlers who are competing to see who will die in the ring, on live television, as the result of his own courage.
Before I get a lot of hate male regarding Owen Hart, let me explain. Owen died doing a stunt that did not involve actually competing in a match. It occurred before the match had even started. I also know that many other wrestlers have died in the ring as the result of maneuvers that were poorly executed. What I am talking about is the new breed of wrestlers. Acrobats who feel the need to perform more and more daring stunts for the sheer pleasure of hearing the crowd react.
Jeff Hardy is a prime example. His Sintan bomb from the top of the cage will eventually cripple him. For those who haven't seen it (where have you been?), it is a head first dive into the midsection of his prone opponent. Not like the flying headbutt of Chris Benoit (which I will mention later), this move has Jeff's body completely upside down diving headfirst towards the mat. Suppose he misses? He hits his head on the mat, compresses the vertebrae in his neck, and is permanently paralyzed, or worse.
Chris Benoit (see, I told you) performs his diving headbutt night after night. He dives off of the top rope, the top of a ladder, or the top of a cage, and lands face first on his prone opponent. His head snaps back when it makes contact with his opponent, and he experiences pain in his head and neck. Benoit doesn't have to miss to be paralyzed. All he needs is to have his head snap back a little harder, or at the wrong angle to rupture the vertebrae in his neck. Now, I am not a doctor, I just play one in Wrestling: In Your Face, and I know that disrupting the normal function of the neck and spine causes paralysis, and in some occasions, death.
Sean Waltman, X-Pac, is not the daredevil that he once was. Leg and neck injuries have changed his wrestling style from a daredevil to a martial artist who throws the occasional drop kick. His problem is that he is constantly being booked against the giants of the WWF, in an effort to show off his courage. Weighing 220 pounds, and being thrown around by 7-footers and 400-pounders has to shorten a career. What happens if lands wrong or lands in the wrong place? What if he is thrown outside of the ring and hits a guardrail headfirst? He breaks his neck and possibly dies.
Now, I like wrestling because it, like other sports, allows me to watch people doing things that I am not myself able to do. I don't, however, want to see someone die trying to impress me. Life is too short already.
This week's issue of The Globe (the supermarket paper) dated January 25, 2000 features a story regarding Bill Goldberg. The writer of the article mentions the fact that Bill Goldberg needed 48 stitches to close a serious gash in his arm. This is not news to most wrestling fans. What is news is the fact that the author labels the cut "Another Wrestling Tragedy, following those of Owen Hart & Steve Austin". HUH?Owen Hart died performing a stunt where he was being dropped by a wire from the ceiling of the Kemper Arena in Kansas City, Missouri. The device that was to lower him malfunctioned, and he fell to his death. This is a tragedy because it robbed his family of the opportunity to enjoy the company of Owen.
Steve Austin is undergoing surgery to repair an injury to his neck and spine (see above article) as the result of a accumulation of blows to the head, neck, and back. Austin may be forced to retire, and may be permanently injured. This is a tragedy because it robs the sport of wrestling of the opportunity of seeing one of its brightest starts perform. It also robs his family of the opportunity of enjoying Steve Austin in perfect health.
Bill Goldberg severely cut his arm. He got stitches, which will eventually be removed, and he will have a scar. This is not a tragedy. Goldberg can still wrestle, and he will have the use of his arm again soon. The writer of the article has a lot of nerve comparing this incident to the others. While I am sorry to hear about Goldberg's injury, I can't label it a tragedy, because it is not.
A tragedy is what is going on with Darren Drozdov. He may never walk again, and he didn't really have the opportunity to become a huge star in the sport. If he heals properly, and is able to return to wrestling, he will have that opportunity. But will he be the same Droz? If he doesn't heal, he may never walk again, and years from now, the wrestling public won't remember Darren Drozdov. Does anyone remember Charles Wright? Charles Wright was the wrestler paralyzed by the Rockers during a match by a move that wasn't executed properly. He sued the WWF for his injuries and won $26 million, but no one knows his name. This could happen to Droz.
These are tragedies. Bill Goldberg's arm, an unfortunate incident for sure, but far from a "wrestling tragedy".
At WCW' s latest Pay-per-view, Chris Benoit defeated Sid Vicious to become the WCW World Heavyweight Champion. The victory was long overdue for one of the best workers in the business. The next night, Chris Benoit was stripped of the title, and sent home, being given his release by WCW. This was because Benoit, along with Saturn, Dean Malenko, Shane Douglas, Billy Kidman, Eddie Guerrero, and perhaps many other wrestlers, were unhappy with the current creative force behind WCW.Vince Russo and Ed Ferrera, with help from Terry Taylor, were supposed to return WCW to prominence. The return of the New World Order, Madusa and Ed Ferrera as Cruiserweight Champion, the discontinuance of the television title, and a bogus tag title tournament lead to Russo being replaced within WCW. While this should have been seen as an improvement by the wrestlers, the introduction of Kevin Sullivan and Mike Graham as the new bookers, with help from Kevin Nash, lead to the uprising.
Many of the younger stars are against Sullivan being the primary creator of story lines, because just like everyone else, he favors the older talent to the younger talent. Kevin Nash's influence was already felt when he selected himself to compete for the vacated world title. The wrestlers are angry because the pushes that they are currently receiving are going to be put on hold while the new creative force places its own imprint on the federation. Benoit's situation is more complicated by the fact that he is currently married to Sullivan's ex-wife Nancy (formerly known as "Woman"). No doubt this will not endear it with the gentleman whose job it is to decide who becomes a star.
Billy Kidman was allowed to return and compete, but the loss of Konan, Saturn, Malenko, Douglas, and Eddie Guerrero can only help the competition, especially since both the WWF and ECW are planning to give their full attention to Light Heavyweight divisions. Malenko and Guerrero would be top contenders to become newly created Light Heavyweight titles in whichever federation they choose to work, and Shane Douglas gives any federation a bonafide world title contender, who can compete on equal ground with any wrestler in the world.
World Championship Wrestling may have the most money, but whenever a wrestler's issues are not related to the almighty dollar, WCW cannot compete with the other two federations. The atmosphere within the locker rooms of ECW and the WWF is a lot more conducive to a positive work environment. Rikishi Fatu is evidence that when given a chance, a talented performer can become a star. The problem with WCW is similar to getting credit: if you don't already have it, then you cannot get it. In WCW, if a wrestler not already a star (Nash, Hogan, Hart, Sid, etc.), then the wrestler must be content to flounder in the middle of the pack, waiting for an opportunity that may never come. In a situation like this, I don't know who the winner is, but the fans are the real losers.
When Ed Ferrera announced that he was vacating the WCW Cruiserweight Title, he cited the fact that he was too heavy as his main reason. He also mentioned that there was no real competition in the division. It was at this point that Madusa made her way to the ring to dispute Ferrera's claims, all the while proclaiming that her true intentions were to start a women's division. It was at this point that Sherri Martel attacked her, leading to an impromptu match, won by Madusa.The match between the former WWF, WCW and AWA World's Women's Champions might cause some wrestling matchmakers to drool over a women's division in WCW, but if they take a step back and look at the situation, they will see that they don't have much of a division.
The women of WCW are all either valets or dancers, and in some cases both. I hope that this doesn't sound sexist, but there are no real athletes in the WCW, as far as women are concerned. Asya might be the only woman who would be worthy competition for Madusa and Sherri, and possibly Mona as well. Kimberly, Daffney, and the Former Nitro Girls have no business in the wrestling ring.
The question then becomes; what kind of women's division does WCW want to feature? The World Wrestling Federation Women's Champion is Miss Kitty, the woman formerly known as Stacy Carter, live-in girlfriend of Jerry Lawler. Stacy is not now, nor has she ever been, a wrestler. She is, however, the prettiest (not the best built, just the prettiest) woman in the federation, but being pretty does not a champion make. The WWF would much rather see their women compete in swimsuit contests, evening gown matches, and matches in water, mud, pudding, or whatever other substance they can think of to get the women wet. This is all done for the purpose of showing as much skin as possible. While I don't have a problem with T&A, if there are some competent woman wrestlers in the federation, then why not let them wrestle. Jacqueline, Tori (Terri Power), Ivory, and Luna have all been champions in the past, and could have some very entertaining matches, if given the chance to WRESTLE.
Madusa has established a history of leaving federations whenever the women's division becomes a joke. As Alundra Blayze, Madusa was a three-time WWF Women's champion, but she was a female Psychosis. She would win the title, then lose it during her first or second defense. When the division became a joke, she dumped the WWF belt into a trash can during a broadcast of Nitro. She has already left WCW on more than one occasion after failed attempts to revive women's wrestling. This appears to be just one more attempt. When Madusa realizes that she is wasting her time by only wrestling Sherri, Sherri will become a manager (as she has in the past), and Madusa will take another prolonged vacation.
If you have been watching WCW programming, you probably have seen either Bret Hart or Buff Bagwell delivering a message regarding the dangers of backyard wrestling. These are just the first of many public services announcements that the three major wrestling federations will be filming in the near future. These messages try to impress upon the nation's youth that professional wrestlers are well trained and have years of experience, and their moves should not be duplicated in any way for any reason. This is a good message to send to the kids, but there is another problem that needs as much attention as the growing backyard wrestling phenomenon.Over the past couple of years, we have seen Brian Pillman, Louie Spicolli, and possibly Bobby Duncum, Jr. die from drug overdoses. We have also seen wrestlers like Scott Hall and Road Warrior Hawk fall victim to alcohol abuse. These men were able to recover, but the problem still exists, and is very real. Drug and alcohol abuse is a problem that could cause as much, if not more of a problem for a child as untrained wrestling.
Without actually interviewing each and every drug addict, we will probably never know what the reasons are for people becoming dependant on drugs and alcohol. But take it from a person who has close acquaintanceships with drug users, whatever the reasons are, once a persons inhabits a drug world, the exit signs are virtually invisible.
I would really love to see professional wrestlers speak publicly on the dangers of drugs and alcohol, because whether they like it or even know it, they are role models for the nation's youth, and there words and actions have a lot of power. Give the two issues equal time, and the results will be astounding, I guarantee it.
When Madusa defeated Evan Karagias for the WCW Cruiserweight Title, I thought that things couldn't get any worse, but they did. Ed "Oklahoma" Fererra, a man who has to weigh at least 250 pound, defeated Madusa for the title. Not only wasn't he a cruiserweight, he used a bottle of barbecue sauce to defeat a WOMAN! Things definitely couldn't get any worse, could they?This past Monday on Raw, the WWF held a "Snowbunny, Lumberjill match" for the WWF Woman's Title. The match was contested in a pit of man-made snow, and the pit was surrounded by all of the women of the WWF who were not competing in the match. The champion, Miss Kitty came to the ring adorned in a white bunny outfit, and left little to the imagination. Her opponent was a never before heard of "woman" named Hervina, who hailed from Intercourse, Pennsylvania, which is allegedly right near Blue Ball, Pennsylvania. For those of you that are under 15, when you ask your parents where these places are, don't blame when you get into trouble. I didn't make up these names, the writers at the WWF did.
Hervina defeated Kitty, and became the new woman's champion, only to be revealed to be former referee & manager Harvey Wippleman. It is bad enough that the WWF woman's title matches have been contested in water, pudding, mud, and any other slippery substance that the WWF can come up with, but Debra once defeated Sable for the title by LOSING an evening gown match. So now, in the year 2000, we have had a woman as WCW Cruiserweight champion, and a man as WWF Woman's champ. To borrow a line from Popeye the Sailor, "That's all I can stands, I can't stands no more!"
The WWF Woman's division is one of my favorite targets, because of all of the reasons that I mentioned before, and also because the "wrestlers" in the division (Jacqueline, Tori, & Luna) can't win the title, but The Fabulous Moolah & Harvey Wippleman can. The WWF Women's division is a joke, and I can't be any more polite than that. The only thing worse than this was the WWF Light Heavyweight division with Duane Gill as champion. Not only was this idiot winning all of his matches with the help of The Blue Meanie, he never defended the title.
It is time for the WWF to recognize that having a woman's champion is a waste of television time. They can show just as much T & A (once again, ask your parents, but don't blame me) as they need to without a championship belt. ECW manages to get their women plenty of airtime and "exposure" without a woman's wrestling division. This is because all of the women in the federation hate each other, and a fight is certain to break out whenever any two of the women of ECW are around the ring at the same time. The WWF has plenty of women, and plenty of wrestlers who could use a good manager or valet. Get the idea.
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