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O.K., this is where pictures and anything else of interest goes.
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Do you see anything odd about
these pictures to the right?
An unusual and uncanny
resemblance maybe?
A truly weird experience isn't it?
These and many more photos
of Mr. Bush and Friends can
be found by clicking
HERE
Do you resemble an animal?
Can we see your photos?
We'd like to, we really would.
Wouldn't we readers?
E-mail them to the contact
address and if they truly are
as remarkable as these, they'll
be shown on this web site!
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What do you call a man with
3 bits of wood on his head?
"Ed Wood Wood Wood"
Sorry, read on :)
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Acebeerdrinker's Computing Law
1) When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to.
2) When you get to the point when you really understand your computer, it's probably obsolete.
3) The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual you least expect to find it.
4) When the going gets tough, upgrade.
5) For every action. there is an equal and opposite malfunction.
6) To err is human . . . to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, it's perfectly natural.
7) He who laughs last probably made a backup.
8) If at first you don't succeed, blame your computer.
9) A complex system that doesn't work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.
10) The number one computer problem is computer solutions.
11) A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want it to do.
12) Whatever . . . . .
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A man had left a set of bagpipes on the rear seat of his car, leaving the window rolled down and had gone shopping.
After a few hundred yards he realised his mistake and went rushing back, but it was too late . . . someone had already deposited another set of bagpies next to the first.
Would you like to listen to one of my favourite songs? Then click
HERE
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How many dyslexics does it change to bulb a take light? :)
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Do you want some Snoopy screensavers and themes,
or cartoons, memorabilia? Just click on the pic to the left!
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Answerphone Messages
Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.
Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.
Heaven, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day.
Hello, this is Nick's microwave. His answering machine just eloped with his tape deck, so I'm stuck taking his calls. Say, if you want anything cooked while you leave your message, just hold it up to the phone.
Hi! Nick's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
Hello. I'm Nicolas's answering machine. What are you?
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On the first day of university, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules:
"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined £20 the first time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined £60. Being caught a third time will cost you a fine of £180. Are there any questions?"
At this point, a male student in the crowd inquired: "How much for a season pass?" | |
Watch this space!
( I don't mean right now..... )
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