What is the future of our country? Do we have the brains to save the world? Can we inprove the ecomony? Or save the ozone layer? When you look at these test answers you won't think so?

These were test answers from real students. (I got it from "Dear Ann Landers".) They are pretty funny.

To collect fumes of sulfer, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube.
When you smell an ordorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.
Water is composed of two gins, oxygin and hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state.
When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not breathe, you expire.
Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes, and caterpillars.
Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative.
The moon is a planet just like Earth, only it is even deader.
The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molers and eight cuspidors.
A fossil is an extince animal. The older it is the more extinct it is.
For fainting: Rub the person's chest, or, if it's a lady, rub her arm above the hand. Or put her head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor.
Equator: a memagerie lion running around Earth through Africa.
Germinate: to become a naturalized German.
Rhubarb: a kind of celery gone bloodshot.
The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is so that there is something to hitch the meat to.
To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
To prevent contraception, wear a condominium.
The body consists of three parts-the brainium, the borax and abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain. The borax contains the heart and the lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowls, of which there are five-A, E, I, O and U