HIPPO ESCAPES

COLUMBUS ZOO

Columbus, Ohio. Today a hppopotamus (hippo-lesbo-obeseo) was seen parading up and down the main street after escaping from the Columbus Zoo. The Animal was apparently looking for something more to eat after devouring the zoo'z entire food budget for the next three years. The Animal Control Officers were called immediately. Their arrival frightened the lost animal who started running immediately. Luckily she decided to follow her nose, and after running in circles for two and a half hours and damaging several, parked cars, she began to tire.She spotted a pickup truck parked in the street, and climbed into the back to rest. She immediately spreas her legs wide, giving theAnimal Control officers the opportunity they needed. Rushing in, they secured her front and rear paws to the four corners of the truck bed. She immediately started to moan loudly, and as the truck pulled away to drive the beast back to the zoo she was heard moning in a sensuous way, " Ahhhhhh Whip me ! Beat me ! Spank me!,....... Lick me !" Upon arrival at the zoo, the hippo was reunited with a slimey giant lizzard(lizzy-lickity-split). They began acting obnoxious together in such a manner that they had to be isolated together in an area hidden from the view of patrons. However, before they were isolated, several of the children were heard inquiring, "Mommy, why do they call the lizzard LADY Q ?