This is a poem I made for Canela a few days after we gave her away.
A POEM FOR A GREAT DOG
Something has been bothering me
for the last few days.
Now, I seem to guess what’s wrong,
I know what’s hurting me.
You’re gone.
One day you were here, the next one, you had disappeared.
You’re gone.
I tried to be strong, to keep my tears inside,
but now this feeling threatens me to come out.
I remember you, I see you in every corner,
I can almost listen to the chain that held you captive.
I will never forgive myself for the hell I made you live in.
You were born to run, to jump,
and I took those gifts away from you,
and, yet, you still loved me...
I won’t forget that look in your eyes,
those eyes screaming at me, "Don’t leave me here!"
And the last words I heard from you,
were a sniff and a whine under the vet’s gray garage door...
I am missing you, more than ever,
I wonder if you feel the same...
I look at the place where you used to be.
I can almost listen to you talking to me through the window...
We did spend happy times together,
like when you were little and you slept beside my bed,
when we went for ice-cream together,
when we played with the Frisbee and the tennis ball,
when you were just a puppy and you came into my life.
This place is not the same without you.
Now there is no one to warn us that strangers have trespassed our yard,
no one to greet us with happy barks when we come from school or work.
I wish with all my heart that we hadn’t made another mistake,
I hope that giving you away was the smartest choice.
I was told that you were going to be free, as you should have always been,
and you would live happily in the company of those of your kind.
This makes me feel a little better,
and, with renewed hope, I wipe off my tears.
I look through the window, I can still see your broken doghouse from here.
I look at the sky, and say : "It’s going to rain, I’m glad Canela is not here."
You would have probably wetted in the rain
instead of using your little red shelter.
I wonder if you’ll ever forgive me,
because I remember the day we went on vacations
and you had to stay with the vet...
When we came back for you, you were really angry,
you didn’t lick me nor wag your tail !
And now, that we have sent you to another totally strange place...
Gee, perhaps you are having the time of your life,
and I am worrying too much, as I always do.
I hope you will remember me also,
with the same love I recall you.
There were several things I would have liked to tell you
before you left this place where you lived for two years.
I will write those things here, to put my heart at ease.
Canela,
Don’t forget the girl who used to play hide and seek with you!
Don’t forget the day I let you in the house without mom and dad knowing!
Don’t forget all the little bags of chocolate covered prunes I bought just for you!
Don’t forget that I was the one who fed you everyday!
Don’t forget Dad, who always gave you cornflakes and milk for breakfast!
Don’t forget Mom, who, even disliking animals, stroked you and played with you.
Don’t forget the Frisbee, the tennis ball, the old shoe and the wooden stick!
Don’t forget the times when you sat by the door and listened to me while I played the piano!
Don’t forget your training ! Sit, stay, down and gimme paw.
Don’t forget you will always have a very special place in my heart,
and, always remember that you were the smartest dog I have ever seen.
Canela, I love you.
