Sorry Grandma,
we just can't afford you
even at $2.50 a day
feeding you cuts into our profit
every pound you keep on your frame
means a dollar less in our wallet

Sorry Grandad,
but this is for your own good
everyone needs a kero bath now and then
(when overheads permit of course)
it's much more efficient than soap
and it doubles as a tasty cooking sauce

Sorry old folks,
we don't mean you no harm
but we can't afford a nursing home
so we're sending you to the farm
where they'll tether you
and you can eat the grass
you can work away your twilight years
instead of sitting on your arse

Maybe, just maybe
if you could secure a sponsorship
we might be able to afford your old age
perhaps you could hire out your wisdom
and advertise as 'rent-a-sage'?

We've got to save for our retirement
so you'll be off to the glue factory
where your tired bones can provide a return
we're looking forward to lives of luxury
why didn't you make such an investment?

Gotta top up our superannaution
so I can spend my twilighty years
cruising the Carribean on a yacht
I'm not really interested in your tears
or your complaints about inflammation

Sorry Mum, Sorry Dad
my lifestyle doesn't have room for you
and my career is on the up and up
my convertible can only carry two
I'm a success, I hope your glad